Hi mom and dad.
I’m going to be direct in this post! My phone was dead so my sister let me use her Phone. When I opened a new browser tab in Safari, I saw that my sister had OnlyFans bookmarked in her favorites. I continued as if I didn’t see anything. I didn’t snoop through her phone; I gave her phone back right after I saw the bookmark.
I don’t know what to make of this, I really want to help her. I’m sure this counts as CP, I THINK both the consumer and the minor are punished in cases of CP if the minor is aware of what they’re doing, which is why I’ve stayed silent.
Now I’ve found myself in a conundrum. If I keep quiet my sister might get caught eventually, and if I speak up; my sister will hate me, and it’ll crush her emotionally. No matter what I do, it’s a lose-lose for her. My sister has already suffered plenty from childhood abuse, substance abuse, and several mental health disorders.
I truly thought she was doing better now but I was ignorant. I keep telling myself she might not be uploading to OF, but if she simply wanted to consume P*rn, it’s free on the internet, so why pay for it? What should I do? I’m 17 and I live in Maryland.
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If she’s using it to watch people, it’s a gray area because it’s possible she can actually talk to some of these people. If she’s spending money on them, that’s a problem for her age.
If she’s posting content, that’s a big problem. You could talk to her, but you might risk losing her trust since you saw on her phone.
Your relationship with your sister right now is less important than doing the right thing. You cannot let this go.
I’m scared to look up Maryland CP laws because I really don’t want that in my search history, BUT if it’s a choice between hurting her feelings versus her life being ruined…I think that’s an easy choice.
Hi I found this in my feed so I’m not exactly the parent you need but I can help you some. I tried OF for a little bit when I was strapped for cash and they verified my drivers license and made me fill out tax information. I highly doubt she is posting content on there.
Ask her what she was doing on it and prolly assure her she’s not cooked. If she was just snooping then it’s fine?
As someone who was groomed at a young age, please talk to her. Don’t involve your parents.
Just a you and her discussion. Say you aren’t mad, just concerned. You didn’t snoop, you just saw it in her bookmark while doing what you did.
Say you’re worried, and don’t want he getting taken advantage of. And that If she’s posting things, she’s putting herself at risk for greater issues. Be honest with her.
But don’t be mean. Be caring and loving. Say “I’ve seen you have only fans in your bookmark, and I’m really concerned about this. Now if you’re watching something that’s one thing, but are you making content on here? Are you sending these people money? I don’t want you getting hurt.”
Please, it’s important you be honest but nice.
My brother would see what was happening to me online and instead of even trying to help, he told my mom and I got my ass beat. No explanation to why it was wrong, nothing. I became sneakier.
If anything, show her that if something happens she can come to you immediately for help. And that only then will a parent be notified (as in, if someone asks for nudes or something from her). But even then? You can keep it between you and her until you deem important to add parents.
She would not be able to post content. OF verifies your driver’s license and face with pretty extensive photo verification. they wouldn’t let a minor post CP.
However she could be using it to subscribe to free creators etc. Idk. I feel like my older sister caught me looking at explicit stuff at 13-14 and didn’t tell our parents, but I also feel like that’s different from directly subscribing to creators, potentially having the opportunity to have chat conversations with them. I would personally say something if it was my younger sibling
Hi! Good news is she’s unable to post. Onlyfans has a very strict ID checking process.
She’s not posting. OF takes age verification very seriously. She might be consuming material. There’s also a decent chance she isn’t watching adult content. OF is known for this type of content, but there are creators who do post other kinds of content. One of my favorite celebrities made an OF for charity. He used it to chat and share exclusive behind the scenes videos and pics with people who paid his subscription fees, which he donated to the charity.
You should talk to your parents.
You should talk to your sister. (Ideally with a trusted adult, at least on standby, but I’m assuming you maybe don’t have that, which is why you’re here.) You weren’t snooping. This isn’t a trust violation. You were using her phone with permission. You can show her that you saw the bookmark by opening a new tab. (I would get her phone in your hands again, before you bring this up, so you can control the evidence. Emphasize that there’s nothing wrong with being interested in sex, but you are concerned for her – both legally and in terms of her safety – and want to make sure she is not messaging anyone, or uploading anything. Try to ask questions, instead of make statements, and stay calm.)
Whether she’s viewing or uploading, OF has age verification, but there have been cases of minors (or creeps grooming minors) getting around that, in various ways – I believe ID verification requirements vary by state, but I’m not sure on that.
Maryland has sexting laws that allow a minor to be charged with CP related crimes, even if they filmed it of themselves. Children have been convicted of creation and distribution based on filming themself + sending it to a group chat.
Hopefully she is just watching, which in itself isn’t great (developing brains are not ready to handle that kind of dopamine flooding, which it sounds like she’s already struggling with – this is linked to addiction and other disorders) but not as urgent as making sure she isn’t uploading or messaging.
Your sister may not react well to this, she may find it overwhelming, and it might make her angry, or sad, and she might take it out on you. It is not a lose-lose, though, there’s just some difficult terrain between her and the finish line. There’s difficult terrain in both directions, so she might as well be headed towards the side with a win at the end.
It’s much, much better for her to hate you (which will probably be temporary) then get caught as a creator, or worse. (Run away with someone she met via OF into a trafficking situation. Not to freak you out – the fact she hasn’t got it well hidden is a good sign that she’s not involved with someone who’s explaining how to hide it better – but to underline that this could get serious, if left unchecked.)
If you feel like you need more specific support (like if you find out she’s messaging with someone, or sending someone content to post on her behalf) I found the Human Trafficking Prevention Project, an initiative of the Maryland Volunteer Lawyer Service. I don’t know if links are allowed here, but that should be enough to get to get there via search engine. Their page has a number of organizations that might have relevant resources.
Good luck, this is an act of love, even if she doesn’t feel it right away, and I hope it all goes as peacefully as it can.
Edit to add: you are also a kid, and this is more than you should have to deal with. Be proud of yourself, no matter how it goes. I hope you also have a source of support – you deserve it. Your sisters struggles are big, but yours get space too. it’s great to be a helper, but you can’t give from an empty cup, and taking care of yourself needs to also be a priority.
They require ID and video facial scanning to post. Not all OF pages pay walled, many are free to view.
I’d be more worried if she was sending nudes to guys, they share and upload and websites profit regardless of proper identification and model releases.
Level with her…. Personally I’m confrontational so I would just talk to her about it like “hey, I stumbled upon this on your phone and I’m really concerned… It’s all well and fine for developed women to seek this type of attention, but for a girl your age its not only illegal but dangerous. Girls are often lured by predators and disappear from their families forever. People on the internet cannot be trusted, and it concerns me that I have found this on your phone because it means you’re vulnerable to exploitation by people who actually want to harm you even though they act nice”….. She may be young but she’s not inept, just speak with her and make her understand why it’s not a good idea for her to be engaging with that sort of thing.
Don’t shield her, EMPOWER HER.
There’s some crucial context missing, and you may need to talk to your sister to figure out how to handle the situation. If it’s as you described you didn’t see enough.
Your sister has only fans bookmarked on her phone. That’s all you know – why are you jumping to the conclusion that she’s creating content?? She’s 14 and your sister….
Ask her, tell her it makes you uncomfortable to know she is visiting an 18+ site. But that is it. You’re 17, she’s 14, you’re not the parent, and it may just be something to hand off to them. I think you’re sort of blowing it out of proportion by jumping to conclusions
As someone who his lived through something like this on her end, 1000% I wouldn’t say a thing. She’s not posting. Any action taken on your part, given her history, will only make it worse.
I’m more worried about the people she is interacting with tbh. They have more to lose here.
Also, there is other content besides erotic on OF. I know, that’s not what it’s known for, but still.
At the point where she is (if she is) taking riskier behaviors secretly, it’s because her parents have already betrayed her so much that she can’t trust them, and their involvement is only going to make it worse.