Hi Reddit,
I (17M at the time, now 18) and my girlfriend (17F, now 18) have been in a relationship for over 2 years. This is a story not about heartbreak or betrayal, but about resilience, fear, love, and responsibility. I’m sharing this to remind others that sometimes, even in darkness, there is space for courage and movement forward.
In 2024, we lived in the industrial city of Dnipro, Ukraine — more than 100km from the front lines. We lived separately with our families. I was already aware of how serious things might get, and by February I began preparing for long blackouts, missile attacks, and drone strikes. None of this felt real to others yet, but I started saving, gathering basic supplies, and analyzing exit options. Quietly, over months, we began putting shared savings into a joint account.
Then came July. On July 2, 2024, my district was hit by ballistic missiles — over eight of them within 500 meters of my home. One struck just 400 meters from my building. A week later, the attack repeated with double the intensity. Around this time, my parents were going through a divorce — I had only seen my mother 4 weeks total in the last 3 years. My girlfriend was in Bulgaria on vacation with her mother. That first week of July broke me. One of the missiles hit the floor of my apartment building. I no longer felt safe at home. I no longer believed safety was possible there.
She returned on July 10. That same week we began working harder than ever, saving aggressively, planning, researching. The goal was to collect enough money to leave the country in a legal, safe, and prepared way. Over the course of 4 months, we managed to save €2,000 — not a fortune, but a significant amount considering we were both just 17 and living in Ukraine. We chose Norway. I prepared the route, mapped it to the smallest detail, ran different risk scenarios, including what to do if we had to return.
But her mother was absolutely against us leaving. Despite showing her detailed plans and all the risks of staying, she refused to allow the departure. She even took my girlfriend’s passport. From that moment, we began a month-long negotiation. During this month, we kept saving, planning, applying to universities, working part-time, training in the gym, and continuing to monitor the air raid threats and missile warnings. It was one of the most emotionally draining months of our lives. But we stood firm. And eventually, just before my girlfriend turned 18, her mother allowed it. She got her passport back. We left.
This marked the beginning of our emigration: I was 17M, she had just turned 18F. We arrived in Oslo and were treated with respect and kindness. Then we were relocated to temporary housing in the north — a former psychiatric hospital, where our room was roughly 2×2 meters with two beds and a tiny table. Then came the polar night. Around the same time, my best friend back in Ukraine was imprisoned. I started experiencing depression, fueled by PTSD from the July attacks and from the pressure of carrying all this responsibility — for myself, and for her.
In February, we received the chance to move to southern Norway into a temporary apartment, supported by local services. It was a major emotional shift. Two weeks ago, my 15-year-old brother came to visit me for 19 days — we hadn’t seen each other in a long time. I started training seriously again, and I feel like I’m finally returning to my best version.
We’ve made it through things many people our age never imagine. It wasn’t without conflict — we had many disagreements, and I (17M) admit I behaved like a complete idiot more than once. But despite the stress, trauma, losses, and uncertainty — we’re still together. We recently celebrated 2 years. We’re building small hobbies, slowly integrating into local society, and appreciating the calm we never had.
This was a path full of fear, pressure, responsibility, and unpredictability. We’re still walking it.
TL;DR:
17M and 17F from Dnipro, Ukraine — after experiencing ballistic missile attacks, separation, family breakdown, and PTSD — saved money and emigrated to Norway in 2024. Despite age, resistance from family, and overwhelming pressure, we stood firm. We’re now safe, stable, and still together after 2 years.