EDIT : slapped not punched, didnt know there was two different words in english 😞
My sister was telling my dad how she didnt like her classmates and didnt have any friends in it (first school day) and seemed very sad.
She was overreacting and wallowing a bit in self-pity but at her age things get disproportionate easily and she clearly needed a hug.
Anyway, my dad started to get mad, telling her she shouldnt be in this state for such a little matter and that she should stop complaining. That didnt hit quite the mark, she started to cry.
He then yelled at her, telling her to stop crying and that what she was saying was dumb, she shouldnt condemn all her classmates because she didnt like some people in it (which i believe is true but should have never been said like that).
I was watching the scene from like 2 meters away and i decided to intervene because the situation was clearly out of hand and I had never seen my little sister cry like this.
I asked him to let her go to her room and not to talk to her like that. He got mad at me and asked me to go to mine and let them finish the ‘discussion’. I said no im major now you dont see youre doing more harm than good here? Let her go. He didnt want to so i said stop, youre clearly overreacting, talk with her in an hour now let go.
I saw anger boiling in him and he then said “youre gonna get one”. He stood up and approached me, and then slammed me in the face. I was so shocked and angry that i had to control myself not to hit him back, i do not believe violence is ever the solution, and i told him youll explain yourself with the police and i took my sister to my room.
We did the biggest hug we ever did, shes fine now, but im not. My dad had already threatened to slam me before, but he never did it.
Im going to uni in two days, and i wonder if i should ever get back. I love my mom, and my dad at times, but im not sure i can forgive him for what he did, and especially being so heartless with his children.
I dont know if hes got a mental problem, hes often very kind, but he also have said things to me that no child should ever hear from their parents.
Im lost, i dont know if i should go to the police (even though they will probably do nothing) ,if i should ever come back (and then never see my sister before shes major?), and im concerned about my sister being the only children home.
My parents are paying for uni which is very expensive, and im scared my dad will try to cut my rent and uni fee. He had already tried to cut my phone contract in the past (he was very angry too) and would have succeeded if my mom didnt stop him before he did it.
Also he was supposed to drive the car with all my things to my flat in two days and i dont want him to come now, but i dont have driver license 💀.
Anyway, im lost, any help is welcome.
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One and done. ONE act of physical violence needs to be the first AND LAST. Do not go back home. Please OP file a police report. What if he gets that angry at your little sister? He could put her in the hospital. File the report. Take photos of your face. This absolutely needs to be on record.
Your dad is 50 now. Based on your post it seems you’re surprised he was physically violent. I wonder if this violent personality change could be brought on by some kind of mental disorder like alzheimers.
Either way its never okay for him to hit you. I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this.
That’s really tough 💔. You did the right thing protecting your sister. Please know what happened is abuse — no parent should ever punch their child. Since you’re about to move to uni, reach out to your mom or another trusted adult to make a plan for your sister’s safety. If your dad controls money, consider speaking to your university about financial aid or emergency support. You don’t deserve to carry this alone 🙏
I would think you older enough to talk directly with your dad when you both have calmed down.
I’m sorry you’re in such a shitty situation. I guess only you can decide what price is worth the comforts your abusive father provides?
Your uni may have hardship supports and scholarships and housing for people fleeing abuse – maybe check on that? Then you’re free of that coercion to keep tolerating him.
Pray for help🙏❤️
When I was a child one slap when misbehaving was not considered abuse! Teenagers can be very overwhelmed, especially if they don’t have limits!
I believe the father was exhausted by her behaviour, and the son came in to make things even worse!
You should not say punch when your description of the event indicates that you were slapped!
Reporting your father to the police, whether you have a mark on your face or not, could at least mean that you might have your life and study expenses cut! You are no longer an adolescent!
PS: I am the father of a young child! My wife accuses me of being very soft to him cause he is really a tough case and she does the hard work for me! When I was 18 I fought with my father and punched his ribs! He told me to leave the house! He did not mean it and my mother soothed the scene! I regret it!
Do go to the police so there is a record. Even if they don’t do anything now, there will be a paper trail.
Call the police. When you leave, you won’t be there to protect your sister.
You deserve to feel safe and respected… no one should ever have to choose between their family and their well-being, please take steps to protect yourself by getting it on record with local authorities, because you’re stronger than this situation and deserve a future where you can thrive without fear.
Wtf! Just from the main title
The hard part here is your uni, if you push too far he may cut that off. You have to decide if you’re willing to risk that by pushing this or you back down, apologize and keep your head down till you graduate. Obviously I think you should go NC, mental illness doesn’t excuse physical violence because plenty of mental ill people don’t hurt anyone. You just have to decide what cost you’re willing to pay and if it’s worth it to just wait or not
Call cps (because this envolves your little sister) and report it to the police!!!
Please tell a safe adult.