Made this account just for this–
I’ve been isolated from my surroundings for the past two years. I just use Reddit mostly to read others’ stories or play games online. I never initiate conversations. But lately, I’ve been trying to break out of my shell and talk to people. I might not be great with words, but trust me—I want to talk. Sometimes I even use ChatGPT to come up with ideas just to keep a conversation going. Why? Because I just want to make connections.
Recently, a guy talked to me for two days. It was fun. He matched my crazy vibe. And then—suddenly—blocked me everywhere. Like, why? Did I do something wrong? Can someone just tell me? Why block me without even a word?
Lately, I’ve been feeling incredibly lonely. It gives me anxiety. I just want to be loved genuinely. I want someone to hold me in a tight hug while I cry everything out until I feel okay again. Honestly, I don’t even remember the last time I hugged anyone. Actually, I’ve never been hugged in my 19 years of life. That sh*t hurts. So bad. And I just can’t keep it all inside anymore—all i want to do is sit and cry into my pillow.
Comments
hugs
Hello there. I’m sorry to hear about your experience. Just know that you’re not alone and that you will find love and that person to hold you and hug you.
I recall moving to another town and although it was my hometown, it was new to me because I was in a totally different part of town and most of the people who I’d call friends had either moved away for college or had otherwise fallen off my radar. I lived in my grandparents condo and they were in Florida for the winter. So I was lonely AF. It was an awful time that I still recall vividly.
But why am I telling you this? Because since then I’ve met a fantastic person and have had many things I’m thankful for. While I know it hurts now, it won’t always. Have this e-hug from a fellow internaught.
That’s very rough.
It always sucks when people leave without any word, having no closure makes it doubly painful.
People do things that doesn’t make sense all the time, usually it has more to do with them than with us. I remember interacting with someone on facebook, and it seemed liek we were kinda connecting, but then they unfriended me, I was so confused, I thought maybe they accidentally hit the unfriend button, so I sent them a friend request, and they declined it, not sure why. Some people fear actually connecting with someone, because if that close connection happens to do something hurtful, it’s gonna hurt a lot, and so they avoid it entirely.
It sounds like you’re experiencing touch starve. You’re suffering and it’s hard, but not deadly.
I can’t do anything about the touch starve, I don’t think we live close by to give you a physical hug, but I don’t mind talking if you’d like to, I could also help you out with how to keep conversations going.