I’ve been with my partner for almost 2 years now. We recently moved to a new country and are living together for the first time. I’ve been having doubts about whether this is the right relationship for me. I’m aware that no relationship is perfect and moving in together is an adjustment but I’m wondering if it’s beyond that. I’m not interested in or entertaining the idea of being with anyone else and also not saying I no longer want to be with my partner. I’m just no longer feeling confident that this is the right choice or that we’re compatible long term. I’ve been in other long term relationships ending for different reasons and this is my partners first long term relationship. I do have family history of infidelity which has impacted myself and my view on relationships but has never come to being a reason for a breakup. I’ve also been going to therapy for the last few years as to try to resolve that conflict in myself and as not to bleed into my relationship. I suppose it’s been a gradually building feeling of uncertainty and I’m not sure if this is a normal amount of doubt and to be confident in my choice of relationship or if it means something else. We’ve had a few recurring fights having to do with differences in libido and affection, emotional needs, how we’ve been bringing up those issues, and so on. And as we work through these and talk about them I feel more discouraged for the future. I’m finding that I feel uncomfortable saying “I love you”. Goals and values wise we align in a lot of ways and want the same things.
Are these just normal doubts in longer term relationships? Any advice?
TLDR; doubts about relationship, unsure if they’re normal or mean more and how to tell
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Some doubts are normal but in the end, it’s basically if you’re happy with the person. If it’s not a quick yes then that’s not a good sign. It might have nothing to do with your partner.
I think it is normal to have doubts sometimes especially when you are adjusting to big changes like living together But if you notice that these feelings are persistent and making you uncomfortable it is worth paying attention It might help to keep talking with your partner and working with your therapist to understand whether this is just a phase or something more serious