I’m 6 months pregnant, found out my boyfriend cheated on me 2 weeks ago. I’m wondering if anyone else has gone through this and how you dealt with it. I’m moved out and staying with family. I just feel so betrayed and I can’t understand why he did this. I’m trying my hardest to not speak to him at all. I think me not talking to him is starting to drive him crazy. He genuinely thinks I’ll take him back, and is taking zero accountability. I wish it was different of course I do that’s the saddest part to me. Anyways. Any advice?
6 months pregnant & he cheated
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I’m sorry you’re going through this. Stay strong, protect yourself and your baby, and lean on your family. You deserve honesty and respect
If you have family to lean on, I’d do that and leave him.
He’s not worthy of your time and energy.
Focus on you and your baby.
Hugs.
I would plan on him not being in the picture. Ultimately, if he proves he wants to be further down the line, that’s a plus for the baby. He essentially proved he’s unreliable, so you can’t build a future around that.
His cheating is one thing – it’s incredibly hard to come back from that and if I were you, there is no chance of staying in that relationship. But his “zero accountability” is the nail in the coffin.
He is showing you who he truly is and you need to believe it. Sort your future out for you and your child only. You do not need anyone in your life who can be so thoughtless and disrespectful to you especially when you’re just about to bring a baby into your world. One day, you will thank him for the opportunity to get out before you wasted anymore time.
Move on without him and do not ever look back.
I had a good friend go through this. She is extremely bitter, your best bet is let yourself acknowledge the sadness and begin building a good support network for your future child. The more help you can get the better mother you will be.
You will somehow find a way to blame yourself. This is stupid, your brain will do it anyway. Somehow you will think “if I was good enough he would have ____” but that is a toxic thought. Logically you know it’s not your fault, but your brain will try to find a way to blame yourself anyways. Acknowledge this in yourself and you will be much better off.
I’m so sorry for you. Some people are just absolutely freaking disgusting.
If he’s not doing anything to attempt to rebuild trust and make it up to you now, then this is a sign of how it will always be. Remember this feeling; this moment. It’s never going to change
I’m biased because I’ve never taken a cheater back. Although I’ve never been in your situation where I was pregnant. Once that trust is broken it is hard for me to even stay in the relationship. For the sake of my mental health, I move on and never look back. In your case, you have a child to think about. Do what’s best for you and the baby. Do you need that toxicity in your relationship? Are you best together co-parenting and not dating? If he’s taking zero accountability, I guarantee if you take him back, he’ll do it again and again. You don’t deserve that heartache until you become numb and stuck in a relationship you could have exited the first time you caught him cheating.
My advice: stay gone. He can get an email update about any baby appointments, but he’s not welcome to attend. He didn’t just cheat on you, he did this to your baby as well. So, now he gets to feel consequences and gets stonewalled. Put him on child support the second you can too.
Did it once while you’re pregnant what makes you think he won’t do it again.
I really dont understand why you get pregnant with a boyfriend? Where is his responsibility to you?! Your safety net?! And you wonder why he cheated? Because it was easy thats why! Im pissed when i see women that just believe that love is everything. It gets you fucked and fucked over. Thats the only place it gets you. Women need to use their brains and chain the SOBs before thinking of having kids. He just shakes his dick and moves over and you will remain with a kid to take care of. Even if he will pay some child support, your life is fucked. If you were married to him, you will get alimony and child support in divorce and half of his things if you didnt signed a prenup. And if got him cheating will get you a good alimony. But now, what?! Difficult to find a man to marry to help you raise someone else’s child. No matter how open minded and in love with you, trust me very few men like to raise someone’s elses child.
proud of you for leaving. that takes more courage than anyone talks about
Don’t go back. Get him set up for child support. You and your child deserve better.
If you take him back he will know you don’t respect yourself enough to stay away and will continue to cheat.
Just focus on you and the baby and then later setup child support
I read stories like Yours so often on Reddit there needs to be a sub credit just for cheating spouses on pregnant partners. One woman did something that I admire greatly and I wish that all of you and her in that position would do. She moved out yes, like you did. But she did more than that. She decided he had no part of her life. So, she left behind her cell phone and anything else that could be traced to her, moved to a different state used her middle name for her first name and started over. Completely started over. I don’t know if you wanna go that scorched. I certainly would. Neither he or his family had anything to do with that child. If you can afford it and if you can trust your own parents to keep your business quiet, you should do it.
So sorry this happened to you. Definitely don’t take him back. You’re about to have a child, and trying to deal with someone who cheated on you during such a sacred time could easily send you into depression.
If you can and want to, lean on family. But also start building a plan to care for your child on your own.
He may spiral once he realizes you’re not coming back.
That said, protect your child first. If he proves to be a fit parent, give him access to his child — not you.