I dont know if this is the right place to post this so sorry in advance. A few months ago one of my friends who ive known for about a year confessed to me that they have a crush on me, I didn’t reciprocate so I did my best to politely tell her that. We stayed friends and I hoped that we could move past it because I didn’t see why it needed to change anything.
but over the next few months she had said things that prompted me to reject her again (this happened twice within 2 months of the first time), then we had a real conversation about it probably around 3 months ago, and I thought we had come to an understanding and were able to continue being friends
but today she said that she still did feel that way about me and told me how she keeps having to clarify to her other friends that we’re not dating because of how we interact (we do a lot of things just me and her, we talk everyday normally until one of use goes to sleep). So now I’m worried that I have been leading her on or just giving her false hope, which is the last thing I want to do because I really do just see her as a friend. So what should I do now, I don’t want to potentially lead her on anymore but she is my best friend so I don’t want to just stop doing things with her
TLDR:I’m worried I’ve been accidently leading my friend on for the past couple of months and now I don’t know what to do.
Comments
It’s not possible for two people to be “just friends” while one of them has romantic feelings for the other.
If you ended up (for instance) dating someone else, this current girl would almost certainly be hurt, and if you tried talking to her about the person you were dating, you’d have no way of knowing whether she was giving you honest and helpful feedback, or was subtly (whether intending to or not) trying to give you bad advice as a way of breaking you up so that you would remain “available” (in her mind).
You have told her multiple times that you are not interested in her romantically, but she continues to persist in behaviors that show that she’s hoping that you will eventually have interest back. While that’s happening, she cannot actually be your friend.
So if she cannot be your friend, and you do not wish to be romantic with her, the only thing left to do is to part ways, so that when you do get into a relationship with someone, she won’t be hovering there at the edge of your relationship, hurting and/or trying to undermine it.