How would you manage finances in my future marriage? Split? Joint?
I am make 200k, have 150k in student loans and have nothing to my name. My long term boyfriend makes over 500k, has 300k in student loans and owns a home in which his parents and younger siblings live in. The student loans and home were acquired before meeting each other. His parents are retired and have no retirement money. We will not be living in the home when we get married. He will be paying the home mortgage, even when we’re married. When we marry, should our finances be split, joint, or? Should our bills be 50/50 or be based on how much each person makes?
Thank you.
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I personally believe that if you know your partner well and trust them, all funds should be shared in a marriage. That’s how my parents did it, other people in my family, and that’s what I’ve been doing with my wife since we got married.
Dealing with constant and regular discussions about who pays for what and what the split is going to be is just an unnecessary burden in life that isn’t needed when two people trust each other. Everything goes to our mutual account and we pay for everything from it. I haven’t spent a second thinking who should pay what share of any expenditure for years and I wouldn’t give it up for anything.
Open a joint account that you each contribute the same percentage of your incomes into. Use that account to pay all of your joint bills such as a mortgage for a house you two live in together and has both of your names on the deed. Put the remaining percentage of your incomes into your own personal accounts. He should use his personal account to pay the mortgage on the house for his family.
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Joint account with % of pay going in after his mortgage and loans are paid and same with yours. This way your external debts get paid, your each contributing to your joint account. Everything should be in the open full disclosure.
You both make way too much money to still be sitting on that much student debt. Where is your money going?
Well, based on the debt you each have and his obligation, the salaries almost equal when it comes to what you each have.
Finances is a common, if not the top reasons, why couples dont last. With him having more student loans debt and a mortgage he’s paying for for his parents and siblings, his $500k a year is more like $300k (this is just taking into account taxes, student loans payments and mortgage payments along with the standard homeowner stuff to pay for).
My preference for living with someone is a joint account where a percentage of your paychecks go into. I say a percentage because with a wage difference, which god damn the two of you definitely will have a lavish lifestyle, you vant just set a number and then have it fair. I would say look at what your total monthly bills will be, then decide a percentage that will ensure you have enough money to cover your bills and any other recreational fun. Then, you each have your own accounts that the rest of the paycheck goes into. That money is strictly each of yours to do whatever you want with it. In theory this would make it so if you wanted to buy an expensive pair of shoes, you can with your own money and he cant say anything. As long as the bills are covered its yours to use at your discretion and vice versa
When your married, your income is his and his is yours, legally speaking.
But for peace of mind – I like this route
Decide what amount both need to contribute to shared expenses and what those expenses are. Each put in same monthly contribution, and that covers those base expenses. You’re each independent for the rest.
He makes a lot more than you? That’s fine. Do things based on your income budget. If I can afford $2000 towards living expenses each month, I don’t want to be legally bound to $10,000 even if I supposedly should only contribute 2k
And remember that future incurred debts of his are yours too once wed!
I think you need to have a legal arrangement about what you both have is your responsibility.
As to joint – are you living together ? What are you joint expenses and what are you joint financial goals and budget? If you want kids – you need to factor this in. Have you discussed this, if not discuss this.
You could have your income coming into a joint account from which you take fun money and a set amount for savings. Everything else comes out of joint – your loan payment and is including the mortgage. He earns considerably more and I would assume can cover his family’s mortgage as well as one for a family home.
50/50
A bilateral prenup is a good start. Then, as a suggestion, four (4) accounts, 2 of which are joint and proportional to earnings ..
Essentially, treat the household as an entity – funded proportionally by each component (you and your husband), the remainder of each going into each’s respective personal accounts, out of which you each pay off your student loans, etc.
Just food for thought.
Aren’t you supposed to combine the assets and debt and build a life together? It’s not a marriage but a partnership. Maybe it’s my thinking as I am an Indian and this is what I have seen in my family too.