My immediate answer to him was “Don’t”. He looked baffled as it seems he was ready to go into details.
A little backstory, last month I had the flu, my period, and a UTI (2 antibiotics) all at the same 4 days span, it was exhausting and I was bedridden. I didn’t ask him for anything, at the time we were staying at a 5-star all inclusive resort (part of a 2 weeks holiday) and he was spending most of his time with our son.
I don’t ask him to do anything for me during my period, but he seems to dislike me expressing any human needs – I said to him he lacks empathy for me, and doesn’t view me as a human. He did not deny.
How would other women out there respond if their man said this to them, or made them feel like their monthly period is too much to handle?
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Sounds like you married a guy 20 years older than you for his money and he married you for your looks.
Imagine being nearly 50 and still being a whiney little sooky baba.
The problem with your post is that you contradict yourself.
I don’t expect him to do anything for me on my period.
Okay, he’s not doing anything for me and I dislike how I can’t express my needs to him.
Pick a side.
Do you want something out of him or not?
Because you can’t say you don’t want something, meanwhile expect something. That’s contradictory.
I am not saying this to grill you because I do believe he should be empathetic to your TOM and understand it. That’s absolutely a default IMO.
But to get from point A to point B… This beat around the bush, read my mind, cryptic communication is going to take you no where in situations like this.
Speak up… Directly (to him). If you expect change.
Tell him you can’t cope with his mediocre d***, but somehow, you manage to keep the comment to yourself.
All jokes aside, this is very serious that he doesn’t view you as a human who may get sick, and has a period that helped in the production of your child. Marriage is sickness and health. What if one day something serious happens to you. How would he even handle that? Would he leave you or hold some malice towards you if you had months or years of issues. That is not a good partner
You guys need to talk more about this. There is something wrong where he does not feel bad for you and what you’re dealing with, let alone while missing some of your vacation.
I would laugh in his face tbh. How weak is a man that thinks that way? This isn’t something happening to him, how does he think his child was possible? Just wow.
Is this new?
But I’ve long said that if you can’t handle everything that comes with being with someone that has a vagina, you don’t deserve the fun parts of being with someone with a vagina.
Is he normally so delicate and pathetic?
I just tell her to man up.
Im confused. You didn’t ask him for anything but he dislikes you expressing needs.
Did you ask or not? Were you just whining? Upset he didn’t read your mind and bring you things in his own so you didn’t have to ask?
Hey honey… C YA!
So your husband can’t deal with basic human woman functions? And you married him???
Tell him it seems like he’s not enough of a grown up to date humans with vaginas and uteruses.
Perhaps he should date women his own age who have finished menopause? Makes a lot more sense.
My first husband would say he could smell it and make me sleep on the couch. Why we women accept the crappiest of behavior from the one supposed to be our true partner. I stayed 12 years too long. My husband now actually shows kindness and compassion, we’ve been married 10 years now and it keeps getting better. I hope you find your way, you deserve better from a mate.
Please raise your son to be a better man that his shitty father.
So many jackass remarks from MEN.
If he can’t cope with your period how was he when you were pregnant and in labour…?
YEAH, I don’t like it EITHER, JOHN!
I married a man who would never say anything like that to me. I wouldn’t have married a man that was 18yo when I was born.
All women (well, unless they have had medical issues and possibly a procedure) have periods. At his age, surely he has dated other women. Did he get upset that they had a period too? I disliked having them myself and was delighted when I began menopause, but they were just something that I had to deal with. It certainly didn’t destroy my life. And there are many women who have it so much worse than I did. Mine were textbook normal in timing. I never dealt with heavy flow. My cramps were only difficult the first two days. All in all, I was very fortunate in comparison to the many painful difficulties that many women suffer.
What does your husband find so difficult about them? It isn’t happening to him, so why should it matter? You need to seriously think hard about your relationship with a man that thinks this way about a normal female function.
You married a man almost 20 years older than you and you’re surprised he’s an immature manbaby? There’s only one reason why a man would reach down in age almost 20 years to find a woman to marry — no woman his own age will have anything to do with him.
In fact, he PROVED IT TO YOU: “I said to him he lacks empathy for me, and doesn’t view me as a human. He did not deny.”
Is this really the simultaneously older man and manbaby you want to wake up next to for the rest of your life? Seriously OP you need to find your self respect. Don’t raise your son in a family where the male role model is such a worthless loser.
You married a man 18 years older than you who is the main breadwinner in your family and can’t cope with human biology.
Are you even ready to act on any advice, because it’s really simple:
Leave.
Please stop procreating with men two decades older than you! They’re single for a reason!
The reason he married you is because no woman his own age would tolerate his bullshit.
You need to start planning your exit. He is empathetically and emotionally damaged. Your love cannot fix him, he is broken and all you can do is RUN.
“A little backstory, last month I had the flu, my period, and a UTI (2 antibiotics) all at the same 4 days span, […] at the time we were staying at a 5-star all inclusive resort.”
No offense, but… Holy crap, did you also get stuck by lightning, attacked by a shark, and have a piano fall out a window and land on you? I think you should make the resort give you your money back.
“I’m about to get my period, so I’m checking in to The Four Seasons for the next few days. I’ll be back when I feel human.”
Then take the baby and leave. For good. After a few days at The Four Seasons.
>last month I had the flu, my period, and a UTI (2 antibiotics) all at the same 4 days span, it was exhausting and I was bedridden
Wow that sounds so difficult for him 🙄
Girl, you with the wrong man.
If my husband made me feel bad about periods, I never wouldve gotten with him to begin with. Your husband’s lack of maturity and understanding is unfortunate.
Let’s hope you never get seriously ill.
If he can’t handle a period, he’s never going to handle anything more complex.
What does he expect you to do about it though? Your husband needs to grow up or go be single elsewhere.
Poor baby he can’t cope with your period. And they call us the weaker sex! I hope your son is being raised to be a real man. Next time hubby sniffles with a little winter cold hand him a Kleenex and tell him to stuff it.
Yeah, he’s not meeting your emotional needs. If he’s going to be a sooky baba, maybe you need to stay apart one week a month. You wouldn’t mind another nice resort, would you?
He should have married someone older than him if he can’t deal with being aware of a period.
“Oh my gynobot is bugged and can’t achieve it’s usual tasks”
That is the most ignorant statement a man could ever make. I would tell him to go f himself.