Background: I live abroad(Europe) and will be visiting home (South Asia) next week. I work a semi stable job with decent pay, where I can make ends meet if I budget well.
My mum video called me and mid conversation asked if I’m getting anything for the cats. I told her that with all the gifts and things I’ve bought for my family (that she is well aware of), I am way over my monthly budget and it’s not like the cats are gonna remember it per se. I’m there for 3 weeks. She says that I’m coming home after a whole year. I told her no. I’m not getting anything for the cats. Then she turns to one of the cats and says in a baby voice, “Your sister (me) is not going to buy you anything. Claw her/Scratch her when she comes, yeah?”
I got mad. I don’t appreciate this. Ik they are cats but I don’t like this attitude. And I told her, asked her what the hell does she mean? That just because I’m not buying someone, even cats, they are not only allowed but encouraged to hurt me? She got really defensive, saying they are cats and they dont understand orders and she is just joking. I hung up on her and refused to answer further calls. Now she is sending me voice memos, asking why am I suddenly like this, getting mad at the smallest things and not understanding and over reacting. So AITA?
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Background: I live abroad(Europe) and will be visiting home (South Asia) next week. I work a semi stable job with decent pay, where I can make ends meet if I budget well.
My mum video called me and mid conversation asked if I’m getting anything for the cats. I told her that with all the gifts and things I’ve bought for my family (that she is well aware of), I am way over my monthly budget and it’s not like the cats are gonna remember it per se. I’m there for 3 weeks. She says that I’m coming home after a whole year. I told her no. I’m not getting anything for the cats. Then she turns to one of the cats and says in a baby voice, “Your sister (me) is not going to buy you anything. Claw her/Scratch her when she comes, yeah?”
I got mad. I don’t appreciate this. Ik they are cats but I don’t like this attitude. And I told her, asked her what the hell does she mean? That just because I’m not buying someone, even cats, they are not only allowed but encouraged to hurt me? She got really defensive, saying they are cats and they dont understand orders and she is just joking. I hung up on her and refused to answer further calls. Now she is sending me voice memos, asking why am I suddenly like this, getting mad at the smallest things and not understanding and over reacting. So AITA?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> (1) I got mad at my mother and hung up and refuse to answer her further calls. I might be the asshole because i overreacted what could simply have been just a joke.
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Is this about the claw/scratch jokes or about how it might feel like she treats those cats as above you?
Cats? No. No.
NTA.
I have two cats and love them like family. I would never expect anyome to bring them anything and your mother’s behavior is inacceptable. Not only the gifts thing, but calling you sister and making jokes about aggression. NTA
ESH. Your mom sucks for making the stupid joke. But it was a stupid joke. If a cat is gonna scratch you, it’s just going to do so. I give my cats commands all the time, never once do they listen. It was obviously a joke and you overreacted
They can have the boxes, tissue paper that the other gifts come in! My cats love receiving packaging from other people’s gifts more than anything else.
YTA, you way overreacted to a very small joke. Are you always this hypersensitive? The cats haven’t been ordered to attack you. Settle down.
ESH. Your mum for making a mean-spirited joke, you for WILDLY overreacting to said joke… are you quite sure this isn’t about a deeper conflict with your mum, because if it was just about her telling the cat, who doesn’t understand, to scratch you for not bringing a present then I’m with her in asking why are you like this?
Nta. Ya mum sounds like she’s trying to guilt you
YTA She was just joking.
Your mother is wrong!! I have a cat and would never expect my daughter to buy it a gift. Most of the time cats won’t play with the gift anyway. Their favorite gift is a empty box to jump into.
I mean, the comment was clearly just a joke? What are you so sensitive about? YTA.
Your mom is a fucking lunatic.