About a month ago, I saw a new guy I had never seen before sending her TikToks. I saw it in passing in her messages, asked who it was, and she said she had no idea what I was talking about. She showed me the messages and no one was there and I asked her straight up what she deleted and she still played dumb.
Fast forward to yesterday, me her and her parents are on a car ride to dinner and i see the same guy but now in her snapchat. I am sitting next to her and say “ooh lets open it” and she pulls away and hides it. She goes to the bathroom when we get to the restaurant and deletes half the chats and pictures. I finally question her that night and she breaks saying “he flirted with me but i didnt care so kept deleting the tiktok/snap messages so you wouldnt get angry like you are now”
I was appalled and the logic seemed backwards. Telling me a guy hit on you is fine, but hiding it and lying to my face for a month while deleting all pics/messages sent and saying it was so i wouldnt get upset? Backwards. I broke up with her right there. She tried to show me proof it was nothing on snap, but obviously it just shows a ton of “chat deleted”.
The next day her family and her and I sit down and talk about what happened and this makes me even more upset. Her parents argue she did nothing wrong and that its fine to have guy friends. I am confused as hell as to why all her other guy friends she has no problem texting in the open, but one guy she just has to delete every chat. On top of that, her dad tells her in private that “i was looking for an out” and then my gf proceeded to text the guy that i broke up with her and that I was looking for an out. Her mom is angry with me saying the same things, she did nothing wrong, but i just cant see that pov. Would this be grounds for breaking up?
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wtf. Y’all are adults. Why are you sitting with her parents. She’s immature. Just move on.
What the hell bro? Y’all are not 12. You two can handle this as adults.
You do not need the parents to be involved
She is immature and she is cheating. Move on with your life bro 💯.
Her parents suck and so does she. Let her be the other dudes problem from now on.
You made the best decision for yourself. You could have asked her to recover the deleted messages. Take the phone to a specialist who can do that, at least to see how she would have reacted.
Next! Great job taking a stand and respecting yourself. Clearly, her parents are enablers.
You dodged a bullet, good sir! Cheers! There are plenty of fish in the sea.
It’s going to tough but once trust is broken, there is no going back. You don’t want to continue with someone who is not respecting your relationship.
You made the right choice. If he was flirting with her and she wasn’t returning it, then there isn’t anything for her to hide. There would still be a problem with the fact that she let it go on for months, not to mention that she didn’t tell you, just doesn’t make any sense. She was flirting back, AT LEAST. If this is a guy that is around your area and they can meet in person, I would suspect that it is more than just flirting, especially after several months of this.
You made the correct move. She is cheater (emotionally at least) and she has been lying to you, and she likely has lied to her parents. That is what cheaters do. They lie to cover up their behaviors and then when cornered gaslight and DARVO (deny, attack, reverse victim and offender) to make the true victim (the betrayed) the villain. Guess what she has just done to you, my friend? She is using the cheater’s handbook step by step. For all these reasons, walk away and find a woman that is trustworthy. You will be much happier. If you go back, this won’t be the end of it.
Dude. Get the heck out of here! Yeah she’s cheating on you. She’s manipulative and her parents are enabling her bc of course she’s their little angel who can’t do anything wrong.
So even if she was cheating on you, you’ll never get the benefit of the doubt if there was ever any kind of dispute. Move on yesterday!
Nah, that’s too crazy of a shady behavior
You didn’t right thing for yourself, that’s what matters
You already broke up. And you were right to do so and nothing that has happened since has suggested you weren’t. Put this chapter behind you. The fact is that no guy meets a girl and says to himself “golly gee I’m so excited to make a friend!” He shot his shot at her and she gave him the “I have a boyfriend but we can be friends” which is not a rejection, she just placed him in the queue.
That is one crazy family, count your blessings
As a female, that’s cheating. If it was nothing then why lie about it from the get go? If it was nothing then why add him to snapchat where a lot of people cheat and still hide it? If it was nothing why not just show you the message(s) when it came in and you asked to open it? If it was nothing why go to the restroom and take the time to delete PICTURES and messages that were sent between them two? Then try and bs her way and say look at it now after she done deleted half the bs. She was cheating and doing shit she wasn’t supposed to and that’s why she deleted shit. No innocent person deletes things or hides things like she did PERIOD. Her parents are enablers and obvious shit people for saying she did nothing wrong when she did. You did right by breaking up with her. Shes a pos. You deserve better. Shes a liar and a cheater and those people cant be trusted. Obviously her parents cant be trusted either. They’d lie through their teeth and believe her side of her bs stories without question. Hell no. You did right. Yes she was cheating.
Let’s pretend she wasn’t entertaining the guy. Even if that were true the lack of transparency alone is enough to justify a breakup.
You shouldn’t have to wonder what your partner is doing with someone else.
If she was innocent she could have just showed the messages, and said, “He’s bothering me”, and if Snapchat is like every other platform it has a block option.
So you have grounds for breaking up just because of how she chose to handle it.
I hope this story is fake because otherwise she’s lying to her dad and pretending she doesn’t know what was wrong, and he’s willing to lie to her to enable her, when he knows what she did wasn’t ok.
How do you know what message she sent to the guy?
Well first off, your relationship is NOT a family discussion. It’s a discussion between you and her alone. If she isn’t adult enough for this conversation alone, I wouldn’t date her to begin with. Family doesn’t need to meddle.
IF he was flirting with her and IF it was bothering her, the block feature exists. She did not block him. She entertained it and deleted chats. She gaslit you about it. And now her family was trying to make you believe it was a “friend”.
If it’s truly just a friendship, you don’t need to hide the chats. She lied about messaging him and deleted chats. And then blamed you, lol.
I would have broke up too. She’s dishonest and untrustworthy.
Trashy woman with a trashy family.
Wow