I, (18F) and my girlfriend, (19F) have been dating for a year and a half. We recently went on a week long vacation with her family. Everything was going great, until we went to a candy shop. I wish we never went to that damn candy shop in the first place. I browsed a shelf full of odd candies, including lollipops with ants and a boxes of flavored crickets. I, somewhat jokingly, picked up a box of sour cream and onion flavored crickets. I showed them to her and she shuddered in disgust. I decided to buy them anyways with the hope that someone at the house would eat them with me. I bought them and my girlfriend kept telling me how gross it was, and I thought she was joking. I asked if she’d kiss me with cricket breath and she said “If you really do eat those crickets, never again!” Obviously I thought she was kidding. I wish she was kidding so bad. When we got home, I popped a cricket in my mouth— tossed it back just like a sunflower seed. Don’t get me wrong, it wasn’t the tastiest snack, but it still wasn’t too bad. My girlfriend gave a fake gag, and I washed the legs out of my mouth with a bottle of water. I then went to the bathroom to brush my teeth. I came back out and my girlfriend said “If you think just cause you brushed your teeth I’m gonna kiss you now, you’re wrong. I said never again”. It’s been two months, and she still hadn’t. She refuses to kiss me let alone get intimate. I’m not sure how to go about this, and I still do love her a lot. Advice would be helpful. Thanks!
my girlfriend hasn’t kissed me since i ate a cricket two months ago.
r/Advice
Comments
Break up with her? She’s punishing you for no good reason and frankly, she doesn’t seem worth it.
Nothing could ever come between you, but crickets.
If this isn’t a weirdly specific troll post, break up with your idiot girlfriend.
Bro dump this girl. If she’s willing to die on a hill so obviously stupid for the sake of controlling your actions, she’s not the one.
If someone can’t embrace the silly, playful parts of you, then your relationship is doomed.
Make eating gross things ur personality
At this point just see how far you can take it, go for the ants next, then scorpion, the fried lizard. Go all deep south on her
She’s dumped you and it seems you haven’t realized it, and she’s just using you for arm candy. Now I’m wondering why she’s sticking around. Hm.
I bet she regularly eats the carcasses of mammals and birds. Whats so bad about crickets?
I got nothing but crickets chirping on this one.
Uhm. I seriously don’t know. If she’s serious then there’s no point of trying to fix this. 😭 That’s just crazy of her. I mean, eating a cricket is pretty gross to a lot of people. But not enough to genuinely stop kissing you. I would sit down with her and ask her if she is that serious about what she said. If she, even now, says never again, don’t even attempt to save it. She should care for you enough to not be this angry over something ridiculous like this.
That cricket is considerably safer and more hygienic than other things she puts in her mouth.
Sometimes, even small experiments or jokes on your part can really affect your partner. Maybe she just needs a little time and space to get over it and feel comfortable with you again. What’s important is that both of you are clear about your feelings, and don’t force intimacy if one of you isn’t ready.
Gtfo with this shit
I think it is less about the crickets themselves and more about the fact that you decided to cross her clearly established boundaries just for shits and giggles. The same way I once told a guy that I don’t like gore horror movies and he lied and showed me one to purposely put me on edge because he thought it would be funny. Yeah, its inconsequential and doesn’t really hurt anyone. But still, I told you this makes me uncomfortable and then you use it as a punchline.
LOL this is funny as hell.
I’m so sorry to hear this happened but your girlfriend is acting like a clown. This is such a terribly silly hill for her to die on.
People eat meat all the time, bugs aren’t that wierd if you go to like half the countries on earth. And you’re not even making her eat them.
If you want to help her, there’s a book called “pure o” that explains cognitive fusion and how to diffuse the idea of something with the reality it is attached to. So in this case, it would walk your partner through how to separate the idea that you are tainted & gross with her disgust for bugs. And in a best case scenario, separate the idea that bugs are icky from the reality of touching or eating an insect. Because as of right now its the idea of grossness she doesn’t like, but that idea is currently fused to the reality of your personhood.
But if you can’t get her to unlearn it, unfortunately there’s not much else you can do and you’d probably have to break up with her.
You can’t make someone change if they don’t want to. And since the problem is with her and not you, you cant really force the solution on her.
Well you fucked that up.
You kiss her after she goes down on you? Then she has nothing to complain about.
I’m sorry to say this man but when I was younger, I used to go to the gas stations they used to have these these candies they have Prickett scorpions and all different kind of stuff on them. They’re actually lollipops and man oh man oh man there are delicious. I’m still looking for those things, but these things are harder and harder to find.
Why did you eat a cricket?
I mean, props to her for standing on business, but you should probably break up with her.
Gotta be ragebait
If it were me:
I’d give her every statistic as to why eating a flavored insect is cleaner and safer than using a smartphone. I’d make her feel like dirt for punishing me the way she did and point out every fallacy and fault in her childish demeanor about legitimate food, (people in other countries consider it delicacy) have her seeing the flaw in her judgement, then leave. If that’s at 18 years old, then by 20, she’ll think that ketchup sandwiches are a valuable lunch.
Wonder if she knows this fun fact:
The average person accidentally consumes one pound of bugs each year, according to the US Department of Agriculture (USDA). This is due to the consumption of fruits, vegetables, spices, and processed foods. According to sources such as the New York Times, Scientific American, and Wall Street Journal, the average person consumes up to one and a half pounds of insects annually through fruits and vegetables.
The average person ingests 15-18 insects each day, including flies, maggots, and other bugs, which can have a significant impact on their health. The idea that we swallow a certain number of spiders every lifetime/year/night is an urban legend, but Americans eat an average of “two pounds of flies, maggots, and other bugs each year”, according to a Scientific American blog.
Your girlfriend is an idiot. Even at only 18/19 she’s too old to be this stupid
What should you think about the things she has had in HER mouth?