TL;DR, I (20F) dont know if i am in a good relationship (M20)
The background here is i met this man in a month and decided to move in with him to leave a toxic family. I came here and automatically he put my name with his bank account so that any money i gain it also goes into our joint account. He also likes to have both our moneys into one account so that way its not like one of us is asking the other for money. He also does 50/50 on everything. He does get abusive sometimes and he will do things like take my phone away or make me do things he says to calm him down otherwise he would get worse.
When i first came here he was living with his step sister in an apartment splitting a 1400 dollar rent. I was only sharing with him his room and they expected me to go three ways with the rent. I just found it weird because if he was paying this 700 before me why should i have to split 700 with him to help him with rent when im only taking half a bed and all my clothes were still in suitcases. There is so much more but this is just a quick introduction.
Comments
You moved in way too fast. And yes everything you said is toxic. Can you leave?
Get out now or be fucked for life. Your choice. There are shelters. There is help.
You are in a toxic relationship with an abuser. Your next move would be to get out as soon as possible.
Do you have any friends or family you can stay with? If not, a women’s shelter.
Moving in with someone after 1 month is way too soon. You don’t know him. Not to assume but a lot of abusers do go after vulnerable isolated people so I would not be surprised if he was preying on you.
Get your own bank account. Do it now.
He has no right to take your phone or your belongings. You aren’t a child.
Don’t tell him you’re going. Find somewhere safe to go. Pack your essentials and just go.