I used to work as an actor, and as a face to face fundraiser, for a long time. Between auditions and the constant rejection of asking strangers to stop for a cause, I’m really deeply accustomed to rejection. I get that there are escalating levels of rejection, but the regular, day to day social rejections, and especially refutations of romantic advances just…aren’t that bad. You get over it. If the person rejects you in a rude, unkind manner, that’s a them issue. And if you approach someone for a date and they aren’t interested, well, their choice! (And their loss, in some cases.) It’s also a blessing in that if you are getting constantly rejected, you can either take the opportunity to better yourself, or realise the group rejecting you is toxic and move on. So many people avoid risks because of fear of rejection, but embracing rejection has brought forth the best opportunities in my life.
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>but embracing rejection has brought forth the best opportunities in my life.
opportunities which promptly rejected you, I assume.
Rejection from strangers? Yeah? Rejections from those you like always hurts no matter what
If you ask, then you increase the probability that it could be yes. If you don’t ask at all, the probability of success is near zero.
Rejection can really take their toll on a person’s psyche and we’re even setting the effect of long term rejection affecting society. See (https://neurolaunch.com/psychological-effects-of-rejection/).
In turns of reality we can also emotional rejection through apps like tinder having lasting effects on our personality (https://www.ourmental.health/screen-time-sanity/the-dark-side-of-swiping-how-tinder-affects-your-self-esteem).
At the end of the day It’s not bad to you but it hurts like hell. While you may have been equipped to handle it others have a harder time and more serious effects on personality, behaviors, self-worth and mental health.
Great post. I remember a while back after becoming pretty demoralized from not really getting anywhere meaningful with dating, I gave myself a challenge one year to be rejected by 100 women. The results were similar to what you’re describing. Going in without fear of the outcome subconsciously changes how you come across somehow. I never got to 100 and I lost track, because I started getting too many dates 🤣
In turn I became much more selective, and it carried over into the rest of my social life too where I was able to find much more quality friendships as well. And periods when I was single, I was much happier. About 10 years after this little experiment, I married the best woman I’ve ever met! I met her 4 years earlier at a big Halloween party I threw, which probably never would’ve happened if I had remained living in fear.
You have a great superpower
I mean the first stage of grief is denial
Maybe we’ll see another post of OP in a Week saying:
REJECTION IS LITERALLY THE WORST THING EVER