Me and my bf had a loss of pregnancy and I finally recovered physically from this and decided I need to take a step back and not have a baby. It was all very traumatic.
But recently my bf was acting unlike himself and was becoming sexually aggressive towards me.
One night he kept pressuring me into going to bed with him and started to cry so I slept in the same bed and he climbed on top of me I begged him not to finish in me and he did anyway.
I had one of my friends get me a plan b and I guess it didn’t work because I got a positive pregnancy test today. I am not happy even a little. I keep having panic attacks. I haven’t told him yet and I don’t know what to do.
My bf has never been aggressive with me before so all of this was very new and I’m still mentally processing this.
Just needed to vent
Comments
He may not have in the past, or you may have played off some… However, he just told you, and quite physically WHO he really is.
Good luck to you and whatever you decide with the pregnancy. As far as your bf… run!
Get it off your chest….just expect Reddit to point out how manipulative your bf is being. You’re with him because you love him surely?
Then why, if he loved you, would he ignore your traumatic physical recovery? Why would he disregard you when you asked him not to do something? It does become sexual assault. Sit him down. All the way down. Get support. Adult support because Reddit usually asks for ages….please lord don’t let him be 38 and you’re 19 but yall met when you were 15.
With your support adult in place. Ask him what his intentions are and then tell him he is wrong and attempting to abuse you. Can you raise a baby with him? You sure he won’t take the baby when you deny him a baby in the future?
This is not safe and you need to leave. If you decide to continue with your pregnancy, that’s your choice, but it cannot be the reason you stay. You make the decision that’s best for you, but when it comes to this relationship, you should get out while you still can.
OP, you’re saying he raped you. Is this who you want as thenoaremt of.your child? Even if so, you don’t have to stay there. GTFO of there! Leave that piece of shit. And make sure you file for child support
No sweetie, he raped you. Don’t tell him you are pregnant, get away from him and do what you have to do.
He raped you. Get an abortion and leave him
Honey he raped you. Don’t feel as though you have to have this baby if you don’t truly want to. Even if you are in a state where terminations are not available, do whatever you need to do to travel to get the medical care that you need.
No, my love, he didn’t baby trap you. He raped you. This is a felony offence. Are you in a state where you can still get an abortion? And do you have a safe place you can go to? There are a lot of us in here, and we can help you if you need it. But you have to get out. This is not a loving, healthy relationship. You have to get out.
That sounds lonely and exhausting.
Your boyfriend’s sexually aggressive behavior after your traumatic loss shows he’s prioritizing his baby agenda over your healing and consent.
If it helps, notice what this moment is asking you to acknowledge.
The answer is relatively simple. You don’t tell him. Have an abortion. Then you RUN. That is the ONLY answer. Do with it what you will. If your response to this comment is “well, it’s not that simple,” then girl. You are just making excuses to remain with an abuser, and nobody is going to be able to help you until you do so yourself.
Btw- this is rape.
Girl he RAPED YOU. You were sexually assaulted. Get an abortion and stay away from that creep
I wouldn’t tell him about the positive pregnancy test if you’re planning on getting an abortion. He might try to stop it or threaten to go to the police if he knows you’re planning on going out of state.
If it isn’t obvious, girl run. This man does not love you.
Oh my sweetie, he raped you. This makes my severely cruel and twisted mama bear come out, and you’re not even my child!! Idk, but if you’re in America, I believe you can travel to another state that allows abortions to get one. You have to get away from this man. Any man who does this sort of thing, doesn’t truly love or respect you at all. I’m so very sorry. Please get out and do whatever you need to do to be safe!!
https://www.plancpills.org
Abort and leave him
You don’t have to tell him. If you did just say it was another miscarriage and leave his ass
I’m so sorry you’re going through this what you described is deeply violating, and it makes sense you’re feeling panic and shock. It’s okay to not have the answers right now, just taking it one step at a time matters.
Something that’s helped me during overwhelming seasons was finding small moments of calm each day, even just five quiet minutes to breathe and feel safe again. I also read a little newsletter called The Quiet Hustle, it doesn’t try to fix everything, just gentle reminders that even small moments of awareness matter.
You don’t have to carry this alone. Sharing here was already a strong first step.
Please go online and order the pills you need to abort. Leave this man and never look back.
Get an abortion please. If it’s not for your sake then for the sake of the poor child who will be abused and used as a manipulation tool to hurt you for the next 18-19 years. If it’s a boy the father will make sure to raise him exactly like him and if it’s a girl. Well let’s just hope if you decide to keep the baby and it’s a girl that you have full custody.
You were assaulted. If possible get an abortion if that’s what you want because honestly…I would not want to be attached to this man for the rest of my life
Please go to the police, he raped you. Report it if not for yourself, then for anyone else he may victimize in the future.
My love, you were sexually assaulted. I am so sorry this has happened to you, you don’t deserve anything that’s happened. If you don’t know what to do, or the options are overwhelming, start small and work your way up. Do you know where your important documents/items are? A bank account only you can access? Do you have a safe space away from him/place to put these important documents and/or items? Can you make a doctor’s appointment to get the pregnancy confirmed? These steps will ensure you have the most options when you decide your next steps.
OP, he didn’t baby trap you. He raped you. He sexually assaulted you. Call this by it’s real name. Verbally softening what he did to you doesn’t lessen the fact that HE ASSAULTED YOU! The sooner you can admit this to yourself is the sooner you can leave him. And yes, please leave him asap.
Abort this, give is up for adoption, or drop it off in a safe box at a fire department nearby. You don’t have to have this baby in one way or another. Don’t let anyone guilt you into making poor life decisions.
You can take control of your situation right now, even if you don’t feel like it’s possible. I’m sorry this happened to you. I lived through something similar. I chose not to have the baby. But that was my choice that I made freely and with clarity in what that meant. You get to make some big tough decisions tight now. I believe in you.
You get a restraining order, leave him and get an abortion. I’m sorry he did this to you, no one should have to go through that, he is a disgusting rapist.
Hun he raped you. Get an abortion and dump him.
My friend, he raped you.
Make him your ex boyfriend and get an abortion immediately. You do NOT want to be tied to your rapist for the rest of your life.
He’ll rape you again, and again and again and over again because he’s pure filth. He’s an abuser, a rapist. Leave NOW.
AND DO NOT TELL HIM YOU’RE PREGNANT
So he raped you. Get the abortion and fuck that prick for doing that shit. I’ve recently through the abortion process myself with the pill, and the first few days were pretty bad, but the next 2-4 weeks of constant clots and then spotting really annoyed me, but wasn’t much of a big deal. This was a consensual decision between me and my partner too. I’m sorry you’re going through this.
dont tell him. flush it out. move on.
Please hide your positive pregnancy test!
Please report this.
Dont tell your bf anything. Just “plan a day out” with ur friend. Then get an abortion.
And leave him.
But report this asap if u can.
This is coming from a man’s perspective here: First off, I agree with everyone telling you that it was rape because it was, and you need to at least make a police report in hopes that they will file criminal charges against him for it. Secondly, while he’s hopefully in jail waiting for a bond hearing, you need to file a restraining order on him and get away to where he doesn’t think to look. Males like this, a real man won’t act this way, can be dangerous because you’re depriving him of the power he desires. If you’re in a state that allows for concealed carry, then I would even recommend you purchase a small caliber handgun, train with it, and carry it, but don’t let him know at all. Anyone who stoops as low as he did, thrives on their victim fearing them, and the mental power that it brings them, which makes them a dangerous person. OP, please listen to everyone and get out of this relationship and disappear from him while you still can.
PLS DO NOT LET HIM KNOW YOU ARE PREGNANT.
you need to make a plan to get away from him asap and surround yourself with people who you reallh trust. now’s the time to start creating space with from him to protect yourself and give yourself time to process your situation. find friends or family who would be willing to take you in for a minute, mostly to have someone who can stand as buffer for any possible situations.
you need time to process in a safe place and come to terms with your situation. you need time to get an abortion, depending are where you are I know that could be difficult.
You do know what to do.
Do NOT keep the baby. Do it silently and after leave the boyfriend. Also silently as he proved himself to be abusive. Because make no mistake – he raped you.
Your boyfriend is a violent bully who raped you. You don’t have to have a child with a rapist. Please end this relationship and seek medical support
He raped you. I would not give birth to a rape baby, and I would not continue a relationship with a rapist.
Do not tell this man you’re pregnant. Do not keep this fetus.
If you keep this man’s fetus know that you be forever tied to your rapist. He will use the child as a tether to abuse you further I guarantee you.
Tell a safe person (or the police/a lawyer honestly) silently get funds to plan the abortion if possible and get out! if he managed to did it once while you were conscious he’ll manage to do it while your asleep or another time by weaponizing your own body against you unconsensually with his sperm
Do what you have to do and get away from this man. What he did is beyond terrible
This is sexual assault and rape. I’m so sorry this happened to you. Run don’t walk from this disgusting man. Leaving you some info on abortion resources. Your body your choice!
https://www.ineedana.com
He didn’t baby trap you. He raped you
You should get yourself somewhere safe,
file a police report for sexual coercion and sexual assault,
and do what you feel is right about the pregnancy, not what you feel you should do because of external pressure from anyone else
Abortion time.
He raped you.
Thats not baby trapping, thats rape
That’s called rape. He raped you to baby trap you. And is continuing to be abusive. You need to get an escape plan together and leave. Maybe an abortion if that’s something you want and are able to do.
> I haven’t told him yet and I don’t know what to do.
Don’t tell him, get an abortion, and never speak to him ever again because he raped you.
op that’s rape
uuuhhhhh bc was an option
You talk to your friends and you get away from him. Don’t talk to him. Don’t have any further contact with him.
He sexually assaulted you.
Please do not tell him you’re pregnant. He will try to control you for at least the next 18 years
He is now into controlling you.
Run away and all the best with your baby.
This is rape.
Terminate the pregnancy and terminate the relationship. Lean on your friends right now.
Run as fast as you can to a state where you can get an abortion and do not return to your BF ever for any reason. You were raped.
Get an abortion, figure out adoption options or decide if you want to raise it. But definately leave him
Dump him, abort it, never look back. You’ll regret it the rest of your life if you keep it and stay with him.
I wonder if a woman has ever baby trapped a man?
You were raped. You didn’t consent to him finishing inside you, you told him this and he did it anyway, deliberately. That’s rape, or at the very least sexual assault.
I would suggest get an abortion, and consider calling the police to report the sexual assault.
At very least you should LEAVE this abusive man who’s treating you like an incubator not a person. Every time he cries and apologizes and begs for forgiveness, remember how powerless you felt with him on top of you inside you finishing as you were begging him not to.
Im sure others have said this but your partner raped you.
A cup of mugwort tea will take care of this. It won’t taste good but it will end a pregnancy.
Hi honey, if you are in the Midwest and want to be educated on your options please PM me. I have a list of resources 🩷
Get out of this situation entirely. Do not become linked with this man forever. That was borderline abuse and sexual coercion, you are not safe
https://aidaccess.org/en/i-need-an-abortion
This site is amazing and can help you with pills, information, even connect you with legal advice if you have questions.
I’m so sorry you’re going through this.
He raped you and impregnated you on purpose. I’m so sorry to say this. I went through similar situations. It’s hard.
What you can do is leave now, whether you choose to keep the baby or not you need to leave for your mental wellbeing before they are born and establish residency as far away as you’re comfortable with or is possible. It will be your choice if you tell him about the birth, file for child support or visitation rights but understand if you do you’ll be signing up for a life time of seeing your rapist. Let me tell you that is as unpleasant as it sounds. My ex still harasses me despite having court orders and tries to hold things over my head.
On the other hand you could never tell him you had a baby and raise them yourself. It’ll be just as hard but more peaceful mentally.
You need to do what’s right for you. A word of advice should you choose abortion please take a trusted person with you and have them stay with you overnight. I almost died from one my ex coerced me into and he left me at home to bleed out. Thankfully I had had the forethought to text my friend for help before I became thoughtless. I’m not saying that to scare you but to just have someone there in worst case scenario event
That was rape, you need to leave him. You deserve so much better than that. I would consider an abortion as well, depending on your beliefs, as you really don’t want anything permanently tying you to someone like this. Was this the first time you’ve not been regularly sleeping with him? This could be a sign of what he’s like when he doesn’t get what he feels entitled to.
“If someone shows you who they are, believe them.” – Maya Angelou