My marriage makes me feel like an awful person, I was happier being alone.

r/

I’ve been with my husband for around 4 years and only been married to him for 4 months. I’m the only one working right now. We’re waiting for a work permit for him to be able to start working legally. I made reservations while I was at work to go eat BBQ together in the afternoon. I woke up at 4AM this morning to get to work at 5AM. I came home excited to go eat when I smelled cat pee on our bed. I had laid down on the bed for a minute and felt my clothes becoming wet. I had laid right on the pee spot where one of our cats had peed. He hadn’t made the bed so that was one of the reasons he didn’t notice the spot. But the room smelled bad as soon as I entered. I hate this marriage. I want to scream at him for being home all day and not having the common sense to let the cats out to pee. He didn’t clean anything all day. I don’t ask him for much, but if I have to go to work at 5AM Monday-Friday, I EXPECT him to clean up. I’m not talking to him right now because I’m just going to blow up in his face. All I wanted to do today was relax and enjoy a meal together, but there’s always something with him and I’m tired of it.

Comments

  1. Normal_Ad6576 Avatar

    And you married him because?

  2. D-aug Avatar

    Girl exit stage left. Life is too short. Good luck.

  3. Purple_Hornet_9725 Avatar

    Talk to him just like you wrote it here. You’re absolutely right about everything, and I can totally relate. If nothing changes after that, and you don’t have kids or financial obligation, make a clean break. Don’t betray him. End it properly.

  4. SunshineBear100 Avatar

    Your husband sounds inconsiderate. Definitely leave him. He’s costing you more work and stress.

    No wonder you’re happier alone.

  5. ayshxsc Avatar

    You should run as fast as you can 😅

  6. Episkey88 Avatar

    Life is too short to be miserable sleeping next to someone. Either confront him on his lack of consideration or continue to wallow in misery.

  7. selfish_and_lovingit Avatar
    1. Why don’t you have a litter box? And if you do, then why are your cats peeing in the bed? 2. You’re not asking for enough and that’s the problem. You need to set boundaries and have expectations. He’s not a child. Tell him what to do and if he can’t handle that, then he needs to move out until he can. Plenty of people do small jobs until they get legal. Can he mow the lawn, detail cars or clean houses? If he’s not enterprising enough to make himself useful then, I can’t understand what you find so attractive about him. 
  8. Meeemsies Avatar

    Cat peeing on your bed is not your husbands fault, that’s a cat issue, I can pretty much guarantee he wouldn’t have been able to clean it properly anyway because that ish just doesn’t come out of something like a mattress. Get the cat to a vet to rule out health issues.

  9. AussieGirl27 Avatar

    If you feel this way after 4 months then its not going to get any better. He is not going to get any better. Just cut your losses and bail. Leave him with the cat piss sheets and go and live your best life

  10. februarytide- Avatar

    How have you been together 4 years and you’ve not noticed things like this?

  11. chextel Avatar

    Annul the marriage.