I went on a date with this guy I’ve been talking to for a few weeks. At first, he seemed nice, and I was excited to finally meet in person. We went out for dinner, but from the moment we sat down, it felt like I was invisible. He spent most of the night glued to his phone, laughing at memes, texting his friends, and barely making eye contact with me. Whenever I tried to start a conversation, he would give one word answers or say, Hold on, let me finish this real quick. At one point, I realized I had been sitting there quietly for almost ten minutes while he scrolled. I asked him if he was even interested in the date, and he said, wait!, I’m just multitasking. Don’t be so needy. That was the last straw. I stood up, told him I wasn’t going to sit there and be ignored, and left in the middle of the date. After i went home he’s reaching out to me, that I embarrassed him on that date. Personally, I feel like if you’re on a date, you should at least pay attention to the person in front of you.
So, AITA for leaving in the middle of the date since he wasn’t paying attention to me?
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I went on a date with this guy I’ve been talking to for a few weeks. At first, he seemed nice, and I was excited to finally meet in person. We went out for dinner, but from the moment we sat down, it felt like I was invisible. He spent most of the night glued to his phone, laughing at memes, texting his friends, and barely making eye contact with me. Whenever I tried to start a conversation, he would give one word answers or say, Hold on, let me finish this real quick. At one point, I realized I had been sitting there quietly for almost ten minutes while he scrolled. I asked him if he was even interested in the date, and he said, wait!, I’m just multitasking. Don’t be so needy. That was the last straw. I stood up, told him I wasn’t going to sit there and be ignored, and left in the middle of the date. After i went home he’s reaching out to me, that I embarrassed him on that date. Personally, I feel like if you’re on a date, you should at least pay attention to the person in front of you.
So, AITA for leaving in the middle of the date since he wasn’t paying attention to me?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1. My date has been on his phone and not giving me an attention.
2. SO I went home in the middle of our date.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
Bravo! You teach people how to treat you an you did an amazing job standing up for yourself. Please accept this air hug! nta, not by a longshot.
NTA. He wasn’t multitasking, he was rude. You did well to stay for so long.
NTA, I would have walked out too.
NTA
And I applaud you for having some self-respect and leaving when you were being treated rudely.
NTA. What’s the point of going out together if you’re just scrolling through your phone?
Multitasking, 😂 what a load of dingo’s kidneys.
NTA at all. I would have given no more than thirty seconds grace, if faced with that behavior.
NTA. A first date is supposed to be more important than memes. If he were, like, an on call doctor or something, checking texts would be acceptable if he also excused himself from the table at the alert tone/vibrate. He put you off more than once then started with name calling.
Continuing contact is not worth the effort if he can’t talk about a conflict calmly, and only communicates through that messaging app when the opportunity for actual speech goes ignored.
NTA. Multitasking? On a date? A first date? Nope. Good for you for waking out.
NTA – you date to see if you’re compatible with someone. Clearly you guys aren’t (and he sounds awful so brava not wasting time)
NTA
His behaviour was unacceptable. If he messages again, respond that you’re not ever going to be willing to play second fiddle to a screen. Suggest that until he figures out how to behave on a date, he’ll be spending a lot of time with Rosie Palm and her five sisters.
NTA – imagine what life would be like with this guy!
NTA – welcome to a sneak peak of a future relationship with this man. Feel lucky he showed his colours early and didn’t waste any more of your time.
No phones at the dinner table.
That’s been a rule in my house since phones became a thing. Husband knows it. Kids know it.
As a male, you should of left no questions asked. That is so disrespectful. Multitasking is something you do at home, not on a date.
I feel like this is some made up story. Next
Does it matter if you’re the AH or not? You didn’t want a second date.
NTA
Absolutely awful the way you were treated. Ten whole minutes is a long time when the situation is as awkward as that.
But at least you got a glimpse of what life with him would be like, and had enough self-respect to bail
NTA, you were just multitasking dating and driving home. He ought to be impressed by your ingenuity.
NTA. He gave you enough red flags during a first date to catapult you out of the restaurant and away from him.
‘Don’t be so needy’? Wow.
It might have been fun to leave and not tell him you were going, just to see how long it took him to figure out you were gone.
Block him.
He showed you who he is. You have been warned.
NTA.
He said you embarrassed him??
“Shockingly it was more embarrassing for me to even be on a date with someone so rude and boring at the same time.”
NTA. Your date was the asshole
NTA you have the right to leave, he embarrassed himself.
“He spent most of the night glued to his phone, laughing at memes, texting his friends”
You could see his phone?
He invited you out then acted like his phone was the main event. You didn’t embarrass him, he embarrassed himself. Walking out was the right move; you don’t owe anyone your time if they can’t even look up from their screen. Nta
BLOCK
NTA, bravo! You did the absolute right thing! I can’t ever imagine having a woman sitting across from me and I’m acting like a teen boy scrolling tik tok or whatever junk instead. Don’t put up with sht like that!
NTA if first impressions are this bad, can you imagine actually dating him? Sounds to me like hes happy with his phone, so you left. No need to disturb. When he said “don’t be so needy’, i would’ve left too. Its a date, if you’re not interested, just stay home on your phone. No need to waste anyone elses time.
You did the right thing, although you waited to long to do it. His reaction tells you everything you need to know about him— instead of apologizing as he should have he turned his bad behavior back on you. He’s the AH, not you.
NTA NTA NTA! You did well to rid yourself of this self-absorbed, immature, incilonsiderate man.
You did not embarrass him, he did it all by himself. He should know better than to ignore you on a date. Good on you for walking out.
Edit: typo
Whoever invented the word embarrassed should just get royalties at this point.
When you’re on a date you shouldn’t be multitasking… You can do that shit at home.
He wasted your time by asking you out to look at him?
He embarrassed himself.
yeah, who wants to date a dude who’s more into his phone anyway?
NTA
Yay! Bravo for you!
NTA. “Don’t be so needy” he says as you’re asking him if he’s still interested in the date you’re currently on 🙄
Def nta he embarrassed himself