I (27M) am an office worker and must share a fridge with some co-workers. I label my containers so there is no mix-up. In the last few weeks, I have been noticing some of my food missing. At first, I thought that maybe I had just forgotten to pack it, or had lost track of the day for some reason
But the other day I walked into the break room and my co-worker (let’s call him Dan) was microwaving the very same lunch that I had brought for myself. I joked and said something along the lines of “Hey, I think that’s mine – it had my name on it.” He laughed and said “oh, I thought you wouldn’t mind, you always have extras anyway.”
I told him that I did mind and that I was portioning and planning for the week. He became defensive and said that it is “just food” and that I was being uptight about it.
The next day, I again left my lunch in the fridge with a big label. When I returned to eat it, half was gone. I spoke directly to Dan and told him he needed to stop eating my food. He rolled his eyes, waved me off, and told me I was making a big deal out of nothing and that it was “just food” and didn’t matter.
So AITA
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I (27M) am an office worker and must share a fridge with some co-workers. I label my containers so there is no mix-up. In the last few weeks, I have been noticing some of my food missing. At first, I thought that maybe I had just forgotten to pack it, or had lost track of the day for some reason
But the other day I walked into the break room and my co-worker (let’s call him Dan) was microwaving the very same lunch that I had brought for myself. I joked and said something along the lines of “Hey, I think that’s mine – it had my name on it.” He laughed and said “oh, I thought you wouldn’t mind, you always have extras anyway.”
I told him that I did mind and that I was portioning and planning for the week. He became defensive and said that it is “just food” and that I was being uptight about it.
The next day, I again left my lunch in the fridge with a big label. When I returned to eat it, half was gone. I spoke directly to Dan and told him he needed to stop eating my food. He rolled his eyes, waved me off, and told me I was making a big deal out of nothing and that it was “just food” and didn’t matter.
So AITA
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> I might be the asshole because I confronted my coworker directly about taking my food instead of going through HR or handling it in a more professional way. My approach could have made things more hostile in the workplace, and I know some people might see that as unnecessary or overreacting.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA. What is stopping Dan from bringing his own lunch in?
You have confronted him directly, he has dismissed you. Time to escalate to HR. This is why I keep my lunch in an insulated bag at my desk…
NTA. Label your lunch clearly, and the put laxatives and:or VERY hot sauce in it (obviously, also have a real lunch for yourself somewhere else). I bet after 1 bathroom trip he won’t do it again!
NTA. You labeled your food and asked him not to take it. Him eating it anyway is disrespectful. ‘Just food’ doesn’t give anyone the right to take what’s yours.
NTA. Go to HR about this.
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NTA. Go to HR or your boss. You have already tried speaking to him. He will never stop unless something causes it. Being fired or reprimanded should do that.
nah u ain’t the asshole bro, he’s straight up stealing. idc if it’s just food, it’s your food, u paid for it, u planned it, u labeled it. he’s not some starving college kid, he’s a grown dude acting entitled. set him straight or start spicing ur meals up with ghost pepper levels so he learns real quick.
Why on earth would you think you even could be the AH here?!
Someone is eating your food without your permission. It’s cut and dry, black and white.
Go to HR. (that and develop a sudden preference for Scotch Bonnet chillis, surströmming, or other vile foodstuffs/sauces…)
But to keep your nose squeaky clean, don’t tamper with your food, just go to your superiors.
nta at all man dudes literally jacking your lunch like it’s a free buffet. labels are there for a reason and he’s just being disrespectful. it ain’t just food when you bought it cooked it and planned it. he’s the one making it a problem not you.
Oh hell nah, no disrespect but off the title alone I’m saying not the asshole!
Go to your Human Resources and tell them! That foo getting fired.
NTA…It’s time to use stronger language or get management involved.
NTA that’s theft. You have two choices leave something to go off/spoil at home then use that as pretend lunch, lace stuff with laxatives till he takes the hint or report to HR
Your coworker is committing a theft and you should tell him in no uncertain term you’ll report him if he do it again. I will report him to HR and file a formal complaint if he did that to me.
NTA
may i suggest cat-food casserole with a 2mm layer of mustard in it- real ( english ) mustard ? the next day tell him to open his own cans in front of a room full of people , handing him a can of kitttynosh
This is what HR is for. Use it
NTA
He’s STEALING. Go to your boss or HR. You tried being nice and he basically flipped you off while eating your food.
Nta that’s so annoying and disrespectful. You should file a complaint with your manager and maybe even loop in HR.
Is he only eating yours and not the others? Does he not bring any food to work?
NTA- you need to tell HR, your manager, his manager… this is wrong. He is stealing from you.
If you don’t have an HR, tell him next time (in a place where your co-workers can hear) that he needs to stop stealing your food, this has gone on for x weeks/ months and you have asked and asked him to stop.
Lock your lunch bag. A cheap little lock through the zippers of mine created chaos for a minute, but worth it in the end
NTA, you need to take Dan’s theft of your food to your boss. You need to explain that it is no different than Dan stealing your car. If that does not work, then start bringing something awful to work and have a backup lunch at your desk.
NTA but whatever you do don’t lace it with laxatives or anything crazy. He could try to get you in trouble for trying to drug/hurt him. Make sure you have some type of paper trail too. Like maybe email him on the company email and ask him to stop eating your food. But definitely utilize HR or management if you don’t have HR there.
Send him an email and cc your line manager in. Point out you have asked him politely to stop eating your food and that what he is doing is theft.
Also, ask your manager to put it out in your next PLOW that stealing a colleague food is against the rules.
In my office, we put out a generic project wide email every few months when people’s food, coffee, or milk go missing.
Report him wtf? I don’t understand this lol. He took your property
NTA. Make a.complaint as Dave is never going to listen to you.
NTA. Escalate to his manager if you need to. He is being so inconsiderate.
Nta. Put either laxatives or something spicy in your food and he’ll stop. Or buy a mini fridge.
Capsaicin on your sandwich, it’ doesn’t smell , and pack a hell of a punch.
NTA this guy is ridiculous. Get him in trouble.
You need to go to HR. If for some reason you can’t, get a lunchbox with a lock on it. You can order one online.
Just buy a decent cooler bag, throw in an ice pack and don’t bother with the office petri dish/fridge. The office refrigerator is always nasty anyway.
NTA. Best way to make him stop (without violence) is public humiliation. In front of your coworkers start talking about what kind of person eats someone else’s labeled food. If he can’t be trusted with a simple fridge how can we trust him with anything else. Make him feel small.
NTA- you’re being bullied. Either take this to management, or bring a cooler with ice pack and keep it at your desk, and lock it. I use a “Playmate” cooler. Our fridges are always full of shit and I like my snacks. I also don’t like my food being next to whatever experiment 🧫 in the community fridge.
Exactly why I keep my lunch and such in my lunch box at my desk.
I’m gonna play devils advocate here for a second… my previous job, there was a girl who kept stealing people’s food. She would come up with lame excuses when confronted. It really baffled me, because she kept doing it.
Then I thought, what if she’s really hungry/food insecure and would rather be thought an asshole than admit it? So I went to my supervisor with that thought (supervisor had been aware of the lunch stealing but hadn’t dealt with it yet), and she agreed that might be the case. So she bought a loaf of bread, peanut butter, and jelly and put it in the break room and announced to the department that anyone who “forgot” or didn’t have lunch could help themselves. Solved the problem immediately, to the extent that when the owner heard about it, she started paying for the items, and milk as well, in the fridge. It’s been a policy ever since, even after the original food stealer got a better job at another company.
So maybe Dan isn’t just a jerk, but is hiding behind that attitude because he’s too embarrassed to say he can’t feed himself. Just something to think about.
NTA
Its not just food! It’s your food you paid for and put together!
Tell him its just your hands around his neck! Or it will just be a foot in his ass 🙄
What it is is not ok at all
Go to HR. NTA
NTA. I suggest reporting this issue to your Human Resources (HR) department. It is not just about the food, but also a form of petty theft and disrespect in the workplace. HR should handle it as a workplace conduct issue. Be sure to document each incident, including the fact that you label your food and that this has happened multiple times. You can also provide evidence such as footage from office cameras or co-workers who have seen it as well.
NTA. He is stealing from you. And it’s not just food. Food translates into money because you had to buy the ingredients. He might as well have just reached into your wallet to pull out a few bills. Food translates also to time and labor.
So drop a load of spooge in a sandwich one day and let him eat it
NTA. This is theft and workplace bullying. Straight to management with a formal complaint.
NTA Make an issue of it, go to HR, or start experimenting with Dan’s spice tolerance…
You’re NTA – Dan is. He’s a bully and a prick.
I read a story where someone put in laxatives in their food and the culprit has explosive diarrhea.
It’s that or hide chillies in the food.
No, kicking him in the nuts without explaining why would make yta, but barring that, he is.
Report. In the meantime cool bag with ice pack in your desc drawer rather then the fridge.
NTA. As he was caught, warned, and didn’t repent, it’s a legit HR issue now, and you should pursue it as such.
I’m finding a fair number of posts on Reddit that involve people (room mates, co workers, etc) just taking food belonging to others.
Typically, common sense dictates simply keeping lunches in a thermal bag at your desk. For room mates, a mini fridge and door locks et al in poster’s room should solve the problem. Yes, ain’t it funny how snarky people get when they are denied access to stuff that does not belong to them…making the “hoarder” aka rightful owner out to be selfish, petty and over reacting.
Me, no more Mr Nice Guy. Go all in and sabotage your marked lunch randomly. I won’t mention just what you could do, but hot peppers and various laxatives come to mind. Put a second note inside the lunch container saying, “Stay out of my lunch!” Be creative.
NTA
I would say go to HR but from recent experience, HR sucks so.. talk to your manager.
(please print out this thread to be included with the case against your food-swiping coworker)
Put your containers in a lunchbox with a lock. “Yes, its just food but it’s my food. You also get paid to work here use your money for your own food and prep for the week and see how happy you are when someone keeps helping themselves because it’s just food.”
You would have been an asshole if you had gone directly to your boss or HR without speaking to him, I feel.
Now NTA and get the aforementioned involved.
NTA Put a VERY generous load of chili in your food. I’m sure Dan will appreciate it.
NTA, Dan is an AH who is stealing your resources for supper and gaslighting you for dessert.
NTA, next time add extra chilli to your food, over spice it up, some people are like monkeys would only understand when they’ll receive the shock, Dan unfortunately is that monkey.
In the US, putting laxatives in someone’s food can land you in jail for quite some time. However, you’ve lately gotten a taste for super spicy food. Why would someone be eating food you brought for yourself?
Pimente ta bouffe. Tu peux aussi mettre un laxatif dedans (ne te fais pas prendre). Ou tu peux faire un truc vraiment pas bon. Ou mettre du métal dedans, le micro onde va aimer et ton collègue devra le remplacer. Ou tu récupères une jolie quantité de fiel que tu mets dedans. (Vérifie les lois de ton pays).
It’s insane to me that you even have to label it! People know what they brought or didn’t. If they didn’t bring it, it doesn’t belong to them. I spend a lot of time shopping, meal prepping, then washing and cleaning up. I even weigh my food! I would be so bothered by this! Go to HR! Also get a lock bc I don’t trust this guy not to tamper with your food if he gets a set down.
NTA
Time to talk to your boss or HR
What he is doing is plain and simple stealing
NTA…. According to Dan if it’s “just food” he can go and start bringing his own food. The audacity to even say that. SMH how dare him?! I don’t like ppl eating my portions of food! Period.
Throw the rest in his face and then wave off his reaction, “is just food. “
NTA. Why would you think you’re an AH for this??
NTA. You misspelled something though. You accidentally mistyped “stealing” as “eating”.
“Dan – if you steal my food one more time I will be taking this to HR!” is the polite response. I don’t think you should be this polite.
NTA – He is stealing food. Report it.
NTA… How is this even a question? Office fridge thieves, especially unashamed ones, are the worst. You can take this to HR, Dan needs to know this.
NTA obviously. You need to report him to HR.
If it was me I’d just bring my lunch in a little cooler. Avoid the work refrigerator all together.
He’s stealing. It’s not any different if he went in your purse and stole money out of your wallet. Unfortunately most human resource departments don’t care about this issue. I’d go to my boss about this. It’s STEALING. Dan’s a THIEF.
Keep your lunch in a cool bag with an ice pack. Problem solved
I think at this point I would use an ice pack in my lunch and keep it in my car or desk. People don’t take my lunch but I do this anyway for convenience. Not that anybody should be taking your stuff though.
NTA
Can you not get one of those lunchboxes with a lock or one with insulated sides so you can keep it in your desk and pull out when it’s lunch time?
NTA. Tell him he owes you money too.
He definitely shouldn’t be doing this, and you’re not wrong to ask him to stop.
Question though, he says “you always have extras” – are you bringing 5 meals in on Monday? Is there enough space in the fridge for everyone? We had someone try to claim a whole drawer for a week of food and there just wasn’t space. (Wouldn’t excuse him eating it though)
NTA. HR. That’s theft.
NTA. Obvious, why post here.
Next time it happens, all him off he ate it and if it’s a yes. Start giggling and say, I hope you enjoyed it.
He’ll become paranoid and hopefully will stop.
For extra impact, when he asks what you did, say it’s just bodily fluid. 😋
NTA.
Food costs money and time to make. Your time and your money. Dan is just a lazy jerk who obviously doesn’t care about basic office etiquette.
Since you’ve tried to be civil about it and he’s ignoring your absolutely reasonable request, you have 2 roads you can take. The high road, contacting HR. Or the low road, putting laxatives, ghost peppers or something equally vile in your lunch for him to eat. Personally, I’d go the low road.