I’ve been dating a woman 7 years older than me for about 2 months. She’s lovely and we have a great time. But I have some long term concerns.
I’ve asked her what she wants and she basically said she ‘likes what she sees so far but isn’t ready for commitment yet. We don’t know eachother well enough yet and it could/would go that way if we kept seeing eachother’.
And that’s fine. But I am looking for someone who wants to start a family now. Not next week. But maybe in the next 3-5 years. She said ‘if she finds the right guy she will think about kids but it’s not been a priority before’.
I guess maybe I’m worrying too much for someone who has more time than her. But I’m a bit worried about heartbreak down the line.
I dunno. Maybe I’m getting ahead of myself but… Thoughts?
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Oh my god dude your 29 years old and acting like a kid.
Grow up
Bro….its been 2 months. I think its perfectly understandable she hasn’t decided if she would like to create a human with you yet
It doesn’t sound like she’s just dating you for fun, it sounds like she’s being honest about not rushing into commitment after only 2 months. The real question is whether her timeline for kids/family lines up with yours. If not, better to find out now than 2 years in.
You’re two months in. Give it time
I don’t think there’s anything wrong with seeing if you’re on a similar page, even this early on. I understand she might not be ready to ‘commit’ as well nor have answers – because it hasn’t been very long. It might just take a little more time to discover if you’d both be compatible together.
That mindset that you will procreate with the first woman who agrees to it is honestly leaving me speechless and it’s a glaring reason to not become a parent… Kids need two parents who enthusiastically want them.
You’re being impatient. Don’t make her be the one who has to be patient with you just cuz you’re younger.
And it’s not for fun because you don’t seem fun.
i struggle with this, too. Like i don’t want to put in so much time with someone not knowing if they’re going to really want something real in the end. Like i just need confirmation that EVENTUALLY it will lead to something.
But the truth is people can say one thing and change their mind. I now just go with the flow. No sense in forcing anything.
She said she wasn’t sure from the sounds of it. So now it’s up to you to decide if this is something you want to keep doing.
Another truth is that it seems hard to find someone you click with in the dating world you run through a bunch of people before finding someone cool. So if you have that with her don’t mess it up and if you’re concerned, keep your pipeline open.