I (21f) was at my partner’s (21m) house the last couple of days. We are university students and I usually go to his home once a week during summer.
His mother will usually cook dinner once whilst I am at their house. She is a lovely lady and we get on well most of the time. However at the dinner table, she served me meat and I kindly refused and said that I had eaten beforehand but really appreciate being offered a meal. She knows I have been vegetarian for the last few months but tries to include me on family dinners which I do appreciate, but will decline as what she cooks will often contain meat.
I politely declined and reiterated I was grateful to be over at her house, yet I didn’t eat meat for personal reasons. She sighed, rolled her eyes and it made the dinner very uncomfortable. It was the most awkward 20 minutes ever, I honestly considered caving and just eating the meat to fix the horrible social situation but couldn’t bring myself to.
My boyfriend even seem annoyed with me and I feel quite terrible. I am vegetarian for animal welfare reasons and hope to move towards being more plant based someday. I feel terribly rude and wonder if I should have just sucked it up. AITA?
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I (21f) was at my partner’s (21m) house the last couple of days. We are university students and I usually go to his home once a week.
His mother will usually cook dinner once whilst I am at their house. She is a lovely lady and we get on well most of the time. However at the dinner table, she served me meat and I kindly refused and said that I had eaten beforehand but really appreciate being offered a meal. She knows I have been vegetarian for the last few months but tries to include me on family dinners which I do appreciate, but will decline as what she cooks will often contain meat.
I politely declined and reiterated I was grateful to be over at her house, yet I didn’t eat meat for personal reasons. She sighed, rolled her eyes and it made the dinner very uncomfortable. It was the most awkward 20 minutes ever, I honestly considered caving and just eating the meat to fix the horrible social situation but couldn’t bring myself to.
My boyfriend even seem annoyed with me and I feel quite terrible. I am vegetarian for animal welfare reasons and hope to move towards being more plant based someday. I feel terribly rude and wonder if I should have just sucked it up. AITA?
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> I didn’t eat the dinner my partner’s mother prepared, and I feel as if this may be viewed as ungrateful especially as I have done this in the past. I feel I may be the asshole as I may have made her feel burdened, judged, or unappreciated for her efforts.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA I don’t see the issue if I don’t want or like something at family dinners I won’t eat it either as long as you weren’t mean about it
NTA, your boyfriend and his mother seem pretty cruel tbh.
NTA. You’re an adult and she treated you as a child. Your food preferences are not hers to call out.
NTA. She knew you were vegetarian and served you meat. The rudeness is on her. Age, relationship status, everything else is irrelevant.
NTA and I would never treat a guest that way.
I would’ve walked out the door. That’s incredibly rude. She needs to grow up. And if your partner doesn’t back you up in situations like this then you need to seriously consider leaving. Not to mention the moral and ethical differences you have
NTA. She’s an asshole for trying to serve you meat when she KNOWS that you’re vegetarian. Your boyfriend is an asshole for not backing you up. His mother isn’t a lovely lady; she knows what she’s doing. She doesn’t like you, and apparently, neither does he. Do with that what you will.
Absolutely NTA. Fuck all of them.
You were not rude. Your partner and his family were very rude. They know you are vegetarian why try to force you to conform to their style of eating.
The partner’s mother deliberately made it uncomfortable for you as a form of social pressure.
You should tell them once and for all that you have decided not to eat meat. Make it clear that you don’t expect them to cater to your diary restrictions, but at the same time you don’t want them pressuring you to eat food you don’t want.
Consider bringing your own food when you go their place.
NTA but BF and his mom are AHs. The way you handled this was very polite and you reiterated your gratitude about being included in their family meal. But they, knowing full well that you don’t eat meat, tried to serve you meat, and when you (as expected) passed they behaved poorly (sighing, rolling eyes, whatever attitude they were emanating that made dinner so awkward). They don’t have to make a special meal for you, and you didn’t expect them to, but they do have to respect your personal dietary decisions which have absolutely no impact on them.
Don’t ever apologize for not wanting to eat anything. Be it meat, dairy, veg, fruit, etc. if you don’t want to put something in your mouth – Don’t. Fucking. Do. It.
And don’t apologize. “No, thank you” is a complete sentence. Anyone’s issue with your diet is THEIR issue. Not yours.
NTA-she’s the AH for not respecting your lifestyle.
“You’re vegetarian? I’ll make lamb!!”
No but seriously, you’re NTA. She chose to make a big deal out of this and ruin the dinner for everyone. And for literally no reason other than general pettiness. Your bf is also TA for letting her act like a petulant child. No one should ever feel like they have to eat when they don’t want to, no matter what the reason is.
NTA. Imagine if you said you were lactose intolerant and she gave you a heaping bowl of mac and cheese.
Stay strong. Don’t let them get to you.
NTA
As a good host she should have made something vegetarian.
Are you really asking if you should have compromised your own moral choices in order to ease a socially awkward situation?? NTA. You deflected as best as could be expected in the situation; you were polite and not “preachy” at all. If your boyfriend and his mother can’t handle that, they are being very disrespectful.
I will say, though, that framing your dietary choices (which you state are for reasons of animal welfare) as “personal reasons” is sort of undercutting your stance here. Saying it’s for “personal reasons” sounds like maybe you just don’t like meat, or it gives you gas sometimes, or maybe you’re just looking for an excuse to turn down her cooking. You’re vegetarian. Say, “I don’t eat meat, because I’m vegetarian.” You don’t have to start talking about animal ethics unless that’s a conversation they want to have, but using the V-word says this is a stance you’ve taken rather than just…vague “personal reasons.”
If she knows this and based on her reaction it sounds like she’s trying to push meat on you because she doesn’t respect your diet (or you, by extension). The fact your boyfriend is also annoyed makes me feel this feeling is mutual with him.
Sounds like you need to have a talk with him about this.
BF’s mother is a terrible host.
Whenever my husband and I invite dinner guests, I send a text or email requesting any dietary restrictions, etc. Then plan accordingly.
It’s a common courtesy and makes for great company.
I am a carnivore. So, no, you are not TA.
This woman pushed it even when you were polite.
You could have been more direct, “Just as some people don’t eat pork for strongly held moral reasons I don’t eat meat for strongly held ethical reasons.”
NTA.
You were beyond polite reiterating you don’t eat meat and made sure you ate before. They tried to use peer pressure figuring you’d cave. They’re being incredibly disrespectful. They already know your diet, they just don’t care.
You say his family is nice… but I have serious doubts. Eye rolling and forcing diets on people isn’t nice. Inviting someone over for a dinner that they can’t eat? That isn’t nice. How hard would it be once a week for a few weeks to not cook a meat based dish or to have sides that were vegetarian friendly? They either don’t like you or don’t respect you. Or they’re terrible hosts.
You’re NTA and she’s not “a lovely lady.” What she did was very rude and your partner should have backed you up instead of being annoyed.
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NTA, you told them you were a vegetarian and that’s all there is to it. My ex’s mother, even though I told her I never expected dinner from her and that she didn’t have to go out of her way ever, would always still make sure I had something I could eat in the fridge if she couldn’t make part of the meal itself vegetarian for me. Never settle for less than even just basic understanding
If you are a vegetarian and your partner and this family does not respect you enough to fix meals you can eat then I wouldn’t eat there either and maybe you should not be in that relationship. Do you honestly think they’ll ever honor your wishes?
NTA at all… why didnt your boyfriend stand up for you? Dump them all. The good ones do exist
NTA. Maybe dump this bf if he’s going to get annoyed at you because of your dietary restrictions. You were not being rude at all and were, in fact, very polite, and you were right to not just suck it up. By the way, his mom isn’t really that lovely if she’s going to act rudely toward you for being vegetarian.
NTA. She knew you were a vegetarian, and she tried to force you to eat meat anyway. As the hostess, she should have accommodated you. At least have vegetables as a side dish. She’s the AH.
You’re NTA. A decent host accommodates a guest’s preferences as much as possible. A shitty host tries to shove his/her preferences into the face of a guest.
And a decent partner backs you up, rather than siding with his bulldozer of a mommy.
NTA. You’re 20. This is enough of a reason to break up.
NTA.. you politely declined.
The fact that she keeps offering KNOWING how you feel… well that’s rude , as well as eye rolling. BF getting mad would be the end for me….he doesn’t respect your choices.
NTA. Do not compromise your principles and knowledge of what is right because someone is being mean to you. The problem lies with your boyfriend and his mother. They are not good hosts.
You … find yourself a new boy friend . Run !!!
NTA –
I hate how many people can’t let me be vegetarian in peace, but it also acts as a litmus test for who actually cares about me as a human being vs who is ego driven or problematic/toxic.
I guarantee this is not the first time you gave up on something dear to you in this relationship because you doubted yourself and it will eat at your confidence and soul. That woman should feel terrible for being such an awful host. You don’t insist on cooking for someone and then make them feel like shit because you didn’t actually care about their experience in your home.
Also, where the heck is your boyfriend in all this? WHat is he doing? Does he not care about what is important to you either? Come on now.
NTA. After not eating meat for so long, if you do so now, you can get violently ill. Don’t make yourself sick just to placate assholes who want to act offended over nothing. His mom is not lovely at all, and your boyfriend should have stuck up for you the second his mom acted up.
She could have made a filling side dish everyone could eat that was vegetarian. Maybe next time you could bring a favorite dish to share.
I’m gonna go with ESH.
Your bfs mom is absolutely an AH, for appearing to be pushing meat on you, and making passive aggressive actions. She needs to respect the fact that you’re a vegetarian. The reason why and how long doesn’t matter. You don’t eat meat and that’s okay.
But, you’re kind of the AH a little bit by coming over during dinner all the time and not eating. You’re the one making it awkward.
Lots of people would be a little uncomfortable with someone who comes over during dinner time yet doesn’t eat, and just sits there while you all do.
That’s awkward.
So IMO, maybe come over at different times. Either take off before dinner or stop by after they’ve eaten. Your bf can let you know if his mom is making a vegetarian dish and can invite you over specifically for dinner for it.
Absolutely NTA. You politely declined. It sounds like she took it personally, even though it absolutely wasn’t.
This should not be a question you need to come to the internet for. This signals that you’re a people pleaser with unreasonable boundaries for yourself and you need to learn what reasonable boundaries look like BEFORE making any long term decisions for your life.
People pleasers get manipulated by withheld approval constantly and it looks like both your boyfriend and his mom are using that manipulation against you strongly and successfully. Beware!
NTA and I realize you’re young, but I really wish we could normalize women having a modicum of self respect. It isn’t rude to not eat meat if you’re a vegetarian – it’s rude to OFFER meat to someone you know is a vegetarian. They were rude and you basically DARVO’d yourself into thinking YOU’RE the asshole? C’mon
NTA It’s incredibly rude to make a guest in your home feel unwelcome. It’s also incredibly rude to try to force someone to eat something they have politely declined. Rolling one’s eyes is the epitome of rude behavior.
That’s a rudeness hat trick right there. I wouldn’t go back to their home.
NTA, but this is probably your life now tbh. I usually get shit from at least a couple of people at gatherings, mostly as it gets less funny over time because it’s just the same jokes on repeat. I dunno why people are weird about it. If there’s places I go more often, I’ll leave an easy cook fake meat type thing in their freezer so everyone can just calm down about it if that helps.
NTA- You already explained the “why” behind your preference to not eat meat.
I would suggest you start making them as uncomfortable as they have made you. How?
Next time say “I’m sorry, but if I eat that then I’ll be on the toilet for the next hour!” Or, “My doctor advised me that I’ll have really bad gas if I eat that, due to my irritable bowel condition.”
The difference between your discomfort and theirs will change real quick.
NTA. I have been vegetarian for the last 12 years, since I was 13. My boyfriend’s family always makes extra food for me, his uncle makes whole different dishes because the main dishes they make always have meat. They have never once shamed me or gotten upset with me because I wouldn’t eat meat. It doesn’t matter if you decided three months ago or three years ago. It is your body, your choice, and the fact that you still go to a meal they’re unwilling to accommodate you at is enough effort on your part. And I have to be honest with you, your boyfriend being annoyed with you is a red flag to me. You deserve someone who stands up to their mother for you. All the love.
NTA. IMO being a vegetarian makes YTA but the BF and the mom suck because they should honor your choices that don’t affect them.
IF you guys stay together, I would say, bring your own entree and just eat the sides mom makes.
NTA. I think most people would be embarrassed to know that they forgot or didn’t know about a guest’s dietary need, and try to offer them something anyway! The fact that she didn’t, and that it seems like she should already know… cringe. Red flag. If my brother was dating a woman who was vegetarian, kosher, vegan, you name it, my mother would be like “GUESS WHAT WE’RE ALL VEGETARIAN NOW KIDS!”
NTA – I would say your bf needs to grow up, but he seems to come by his childishness naturally
It sounds like you very politely deferred and she kept trying beyond the bounds of politeness. NTAH. Do they have vegetables or any sides that you could eat instead, or is it meat or nothing?
NTA- I changed the meats I could eat for religious reasons, and it took years for my family to accept it. Some people don’t understand, and have a hard time being/respecting other’s differences. Other times, they forget, they feel bad that they can not properly host, and because they dont like feeling bad, they get angry at the other person.
Look and see if there are other boundries you have set, and see if they are belittling those, if your partner doesn’t stand up for you, ask yourself if you want that person – if they consistently choose their mother “for peace” it won’t end there.
NTA. As an aside, when you say your boyfriend “seemed annoyed” you should probably clarify this with him, and are you sure he was annoyed with you and not his mom?
NTA look you were polite and respectful. You’re not wrong for sticking to your values, especially when she already knew you’re vegetarian
Brief perusal of the comments reveals that rudeness seems to be the general consensus.
I think it’s about control–the rudeness is a result of her addiction to Control Dopamine. She wants to control you and/or the situation (common with in-laws or potential in-laws.)
Don’t. Let. Her.
INFO: were there sides you could eat if served on a different plate? Or was it something like curry or pie with meat in it?
Either way you don’t have to eat anything you don’t want to, ever. But that was the compromise my mum picked sometimes.
I have had trouble adjusting to people I know changing diets so if this is the first time you’ve eaten there since becoming vegetarian I’m leaning towards giving her the benefit of the doubt. But usually I would correct by searching the fridge for something appropriate immediately and at the very least offering a drink and a snack.
One of my sons brought home a vegetarian GF once. I cooked sweet and sour tofu with rice and a cucumber salad. Didn’t make a big deal out of it. It’s perfectly doable. And polite.
Nta. I’m also a vegetarian. My husband grew up on a homestead where they raised and butchered their own animals. The first time I met his family my husband told them I was a vegetarian. After explaining what that was to his father his family made sure to include something I could eat at every meal. They were nothing but polite and considerate. If anyone were to make a comment my husband would stand up for me.
You deserve better than a man that doesn’t respect you and also allows his family to disrespect you. Don’t give in and eat something you aren’t comfortable with to make someone who doesn’t respect you happy. You deserve someone that will not only except you for how you are but will also defend and protect you.
NTA. People need to just accept your no. You’re not asking her to make you a special meal. Food pushers are the ones being rude.
You politely declined, and you remained at the table to be social.
I would even go so far as to say that his mom is being the AH for sighing and rolling her eyes, and not having a salad along with the meal, or some sort of vegetarian side-dish. Or even making a vegetarian main dish and meat on the side/as an add on. It’s really NOT hard in the year 2025 to find some great plant-based dishes that everyone is going to find enjoyable.
When you know that there’s someone who has a dietary restriction/preference, even if you don’t share it, a good hostess takes that into consideration and makes sure you’re not going to starve. Exceptions for situations like keeping a kosher kitchen or gluten free kitchen, which would be difficult for someone who normally doesn’t have those practices in place.
Your boyfriend’s “annoyance” is a red flag. Is he as rude as your mom is about your dietary preferences?
She KNOWS you’re a vegetarian and keeps trying to make you eat meat. IMO that is kind of rude. I know she’s just being nice, but, how many times do you have to say it?
I agree with others who say to bring a vegetarian dish to share.
NTA… i may not be a vegan or vegatarian but i would always respect a guest who is (as long as i knew in advace to make appropriate food) and would never throw a tantrum because they did not eat a meat dish when i had unexpected guests or did not know.
I would actually feel bad if i ever forgot and likely delay dinner for all to make something additional for the persom with reatricted diet.
NTA. I was vegetarian for a while in college. When I started eating meat again, there was a period where I was so sick because the body really does lose the ability to digest meat well. It can be gained back, but not in a single night. The idea you should’ve eaten something that can make you sick for some else’s feelings is kinda messed up.
She is not a lovely lady. Lovely people don’t act like this.
Nta youre polite and respectful. But if im honest with you.
If youre in the lifestyle for moral reasons and want to go vegan. Id move on from the boyfriend. Find someone more similar to you and your dietary needs.
He doesnt sound like hes vegetarian and wont give up eating meat. If thats what hes raised on. He will also then ask you to cook meat. You’ll refuse tell him to cook his own, then resentment, arguments ect will follow.
Im a carnivore so is my spouse. But ive had friends try and go vegan and they get push back from their partners.
Engage the Mom alone and in a neutral setting – like a coffee shop. Have a conversation. Be a grown up. If this doesn’t work than NTAH, otherwise you are a bit of an AH. Many people see food as love, and you are rejecting her love.
I’m not suggesting you eat meat, just explain ahead of time what you can and can’t eat. Offer to bring a dish, offer to cook it with her. If you want a happy life with the dude, solve this problem now.
Hard STOP Dump your BF! He should have had this straight before you arrived and then spoken up when his Mom keep offering. Respect on ones food choices has to go both ways and you do not have to eat something to keep the peace. It is not torture.
NTA, but you need to talk to your boyfriend. He should have supported you and his frustration is a bad omen.
NTA. To a certain type of person, a vegetarian is a picky eater with some self righteousness thrown in. You won’t change their mind, all you can do is stay rigid in your stance.
NTA. It’s unreasonable of her to expect you to eat meat. However, it might have been kind to mention that you ate before you came before she had already finished cooking and put together a plate for you.
I honestly feel bad for people who are vegetarians people who aren’t vegetarians think you can turn it off just like a light switch and eat eat meat like there’s not gonna be any consequences to you. Gluten-free people tend to have the same problem with the judgment. Just remember this one red flag that shows they don’t respect your choice.
NTA. However, you would have been better off reminding her that you’re vegetarian. You didn’t reinforce the boundary that you are vegetarian.
NTA. I know food can be really important to people and hold cultural significance but I also don’t understand why not liking or wanting something is such a big fucking deal sometimes. I am very picky and a lot of people hate it, think it’s childish, etc and I do feel bad and try not to be a burden but I just can’t bring myself to eat certain things. My boyfriend is from a culture where food is very important and cooking for family is a way to show love. A few years ago we went to stay with his family in the country he is from – when we arrived, after midnight, some of his family weren’t home because they were out buying chicken (the only meat I eat) for me, and I didn’t even ask. Throughout the whole trip they willingly made me special meals (without me asking) and seemed genuinely happy to do so. I did try a few new things to be respectful. I had been really nervous before the trip because pork and beef are more common in his culture but they made me feel so welcome and not like a burden and I just don’t see why some people are so harsh about someone not liking or wanting certain foods if they’re not rude about it.
NTA, I have teased my vegetarian friends by offering them bites of my meat based meal but never acted like they were insulting me by declining.
Your boyfriend’s mom can get over it.
Maybe start bringing a vegetarian dish to share?
NTA. Neither your boyfriend nor his mother respect you or take your reasons for being a vegetarian seriously
You have every right to choose your own diet and not eat meat, obviously. But it is also rude to accept an invitation and then not eat what you are served. I do think it would be better to decline invitations when someone is clearly not equipped to cook for you. They are not vegetarian and they don’t have vegetarian recipes in their cooking repertoire, and you know this because you have been going for some time now. It is possible to stick to your principles and also be a courteous guest, which in this case I feel means not being there at meal times.
NTA
A lovely lady would not be rolling her eyes at a guest politely refusing food for a solid reason she already knew about. A lovely lady would be someone who would have bought or prepared vegetarian friendly options. It’s also a red flag that your BF wasn’t backing you up. At the very least you should sit down and have a conversation with him. But why would you stay with someone who potentially is going to act this way every time his family disapproves of something you do?
(Saying all that as a non-vegetarian.)
NTA. Eat everything except the meat.
NTA.
Ugh I hate this kind of scenario. Been vegetarian for 30 years and I’ve dealt with this situation before. I really don’t care if people get mad, uncomfortable or don’t like it. People get weird when you don’t eat meat and they jump to the conclusion that you are judging them and they get preemptively mad about it. I’ve never given anyone trouble about eating meat but had people be absolutely awful to me about not eating meat many times. Their issues are not my problem.
I just tell people that I don’t expect them to go out of their way for me. I’ll eat what I can, or I’ll eat before I visit and I encourage them to enjoy their meal. When you’re chill about it they get over it pretty quickly. In short, be polite, don’t make a big deal and they’ll get over it soon enough and meals won’t be so awkward.
Stop second-guessing yourself. Someone served you food that you don’t eat, and for some reason you think that makes you rude? You should be wondering why your current bf was annoyed with you, and whether or not this is the way you want to be treated.
She is a horrible woman. She’s doing this deliberately. Do not cave to her. I’d stop going over for dinner just because of this. Or sit in another room on my phone.
NTA they’re not nice, they’re intentionally trying to get you to eat meat. Don’t do it – dump them. I’m an omnivore that hunts – they’re being being jerks not “nice”
It’s very simple: if you don’t want to eat meat, you don’t eat it. Your bf knows, she knows, everyone knows, no need for anyone to make a fuss about it.
Now for the most important matter: how serious are you and your partner about your relationship regarding the future, and what place will meat have in it? If he seemed annoyed by what happened, he is definately not supporting your choice.
You really should want to have that conversation now, and not after a couple of years when the both of you will have invested so much more time and effort in the relationship just for the drama to explode when planning the menu options for the wedding.
It’s so awful they treated you and your ethics like a problem. Me being me I would have dove in and made dinner even worse if they treated me that way for not wanting to eat someone who didn’t want to die. You’re always welcome at a vegan table.
NTA
NTA – if she’s serving you meat, she’s not trying to include you in dinner, she’s trying to force you to eat what you don’t want to eat.
Trying to include you means serving food that meets your dietary requirements, whatever that may be.
Don’t let her gaslight you.
I don’t understand why people have to make a big deal about it. Just grab a plate and put what you want on. It doesn’t have to be oh I don’t eat meat. Just just put what you want on your plate and eat. Why do people have to call attention to it?
Why TF would you think you’re the asshole!?
They know that you’re vegetarian, it’s downright rude on their part to try and force you to eat meat!
TBH you’re still quite young, ditch this guy and his (what sound like) awful family and you will find someone significantly better in no time!
NTA. This is not a family you want to be a part of. And I include your boyfriend as part of that family if he’s annoyed at you for this.
NTA I have been asked to eat less animal protein for medical issues. It’s not hard to make a vegetarian meal once a week. Meatless Monday has been a thing for years.
NTA. You don’t eat meat. It’s very simple.
My parents are meat and potatoes kinda people. They would’ve made sure there was something there for you to eat. She’s a bad host and your bf should’ve had your back.
If you’re getting someone, you either ask what they are comfortable eating and do your best to accommodate, or you’re an asshole.
You were the one being fed. You are not the asshole.
It doesn’t (or shouldn’t) even matter (to normal people) that you didn’t want to eat because you’re a veggie. You don’t have to give a reason! Who are these people that a polite “no thank you” isn’t enough, regardless of why?
Absolutely NTA.
Have you been a vegetarian for a few months or has she only know for a few months? My guess, if it’s because you have only been a vegetarian for a few months, she thinks it is a phase or that if you are meat before you can now. Rude. If you have been a vegetarian forever and she has only known for a few months- and still served you meat- that is also rude.
Nowhere in this were you YTA. And your boyfriend behavior was no better. I suspect she is getting a vibe from him on how he feels about you being a vegetarian. No way would she pull this stunt if he was going to tell her to stop and to respect your choices.
You are not. I never understood why people got so freaked out about someone who chooses to not eat flesh. And I eat chicken and fish so there’s that.
NTA and your BF is being shitty. Either he’s still too much a mama’s boy that he feels embarrassed that you, a vegetarian, declined meat his dear mommy cooked (when he should be going “what the heck mom, why did you make meat, you know she’s vegetarian”), or he doesn’t take your vegetarianism seriously as a real thing you’re doing and is embarrassed/annoyed that you have the absolute temerity to not put aside your silly diet restriction and just eat the meat.
I have a son in college. If he brought home his vegetarian girlfriend, part of me being hospitable would be serving her a meal she can eat. If your boyfriend doesn’t even see why his mom’s behavior is a problem, he is not the guy for you. I married a momma’s boy and it was a big mistake. Get out of that relationship and find someone with nice parents!
So she only cooks meat? No veggies at all? No bread or anything except meat? Stop going to her house.
My bf’s Mom always makes sure there is something I can eat at dinner (I am pescatarian, no dairy), and she is gluten free so we do the same for her the other way around. She even will sometimes politely decline what we have prepared because she is afraid of cooking tools/ cross contamination, and I’ve never taken any offense to that. You never fully know someone’s reasons for food restrictions. Food restrictions aren’t rude, but people who disrespect them sure are.
Nta, she is for serving meat to a vegetarian. Your bf should have backed you up. you can do better.