I was in an emotionally abusive relationship for two years. In month 4 of our relationship i found out he cheated and gave me chlamydia. I was going to break up with him until we found out we were pregnant the day after. Worst month of my life. I decided not to keep it. I then committed to moving my life across the country for him and quit both my jobs. 3 weeks before the move i found out he was still cheating on me. Why’d i stay?! Idk. I was in such a bad place and i felt like i needed him. Makes so much sense right?
My body shut down. I didn’t look at sex the same after that. I used to have a high sex drive, like really high. And since then it’s been nonexistent. And i mean NONexistent. I don’t even remember what it feels like to be in the mood anymore. So as you can probably guess, I never wanted to sleep with him. And he was awful in bed anyway.
My therapist says my body and mind are still recovering from a relationship where sex became tied to pain, betrayal, and emotional damage. Of course, I shut down. That was my brain protecting me from further harm.
But I’m still worried. I’m a few weeks out of the relationship completely and I’m so scared that I’m damaged in that way forever. Did the MA ruin my libido?
Anybody experience this or have advice?