I am overweight (150 lbs). I dislike being this way, and the only thing that’ll ever motivate me to stick to my weight loss goals is a Vyvanse prescription. I wish HAES never EVER existed. I know if I stay fat or drink alcohol excessively, I will 100% get diabetes because of a genetic risk.
I am afraid my therapist, if he finds out, may recommend body positivity crap and pre-emptively diagnose me as anorexic or body dysmorphic. This hatred towards my own obesity and body and genes is what makes me go into screaming fits of rage. I know therapy will help me develop coping strategies for these fits, but if I cannot come clean with a different therapist, I will never find peace.
Comments
It sounds like you’re carrying a lot of fear and frustration around your body and health. Wanting a therapist you can fully trust to hear your truth is completely valid. Therapy works best when you can be honest without judgment, so finding someone who respects your goals while helping you cope with the intense emotions might make all the difference.
and vyvense for what?
Whoa, there, darlin’!
First off, a “therapist” is not who you need to see about obesity, or diabetes, or Vyvanse; all those things have to go through a physician, some through a psychiatrist.
It’s not clear whether you mean that you are overweight at 150#, or overweight by 150# – which? And how tall are you? It makes a big difference as far as approach.
The rage thing, though, that’s definitely psychiatrist territory. Get your PCP to give you a referral, and stay the fuck away from speed, especially the brand-name kind.
Look me up if you pointers about ‘how not to.’