Me and my wife have been married for a few months and we live in her parents downstairs apartments. Not because we can’t afford something but because her parents( who are loaded ) thinks it’s silly to buy a house now and wants us to wait until mortgage rates go down.
They have complained about the air purifier and water cooler I have and says it’s adding to electric bill. I told my wife please tell them to let us pay them something so I don’t have to hear the constant complaints.
So now in the middle of summer and currently they will turn AC on for a few hours and then shut it off for days at a time and not turn it on.
They have an old dog who the let pee and poop on wee wee pads and don’t clean them up for weeks at a time. You can imagine the smell! I told my wife please talk to your parents if they insist we stay here let us pay something so we can have the AC on.
I’m ready to leave but my wife is very comfortable there and is close to her parents and wants to eventually move but not yet.
AITA for telling her I’m moving back to my parents until we find a house or get this AC issue resolved? It’s crazy I have to walk around pouring sweat because they don’t want to turn on ac even when I’ve offered to pay half the electric bill or whatever they want. I didn’t ask to live there for free or at all. I want out of there like yesterday!
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Me and my wife have been married for a few months and we live in her parents downstairs apartments. Not because we can’t afford something but because her parents( who are loaded ) thinks it’s silly to buy a house now and wants us to wait until mortgage rates go down.
They have complained about the air purifier and water cooler I have and says it’s adding to electric bill. I told my wife please tell them to let us pay them something so I don’t have to hear the constant complaints.
So now in the middle of summer and currently they will turn AC on for a few hours and then shut it off for days at a time and not turn it on.
They have an old dog who the let pee and poop on wee wee pads and don’t clean them up for weeks at a time. You can imagine the smell! I told my wife please talk to your parents if they insist we stay here let us pay something so we can have the AC on.
I’m ready to leave but my wife is very comfortable there and is close to her parents and wants to eventually move but not yet.
AITA for telling her I’m moving back to my parents until we find a house or get this AC issue resolved? It’s crazy I have to walk around pouring sweat because they don’t want to turn on ac even when I’ve offered to pay half the electric bill or whatever they want. I didn’t ask to live there for free or at all. I want out of there like yesterday!
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> I got into a huge fight with my wife and told her I’m moving back to my parents and that we need to figure something else out asap because I’m not living like this anymore
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA. Current situation is ridiculous.
NTA. You’re being more than reasonable, offering to pay, and there’s really no compelling reason for you to be living there at all when you can afford your own place. Living amid excrement is disgusting and a health hazard. Totally justified to leave.
NTA. What you are describing is not a tenable living situation. You need to have a talk with your wife. She needs to decide between your marriage and living with her parents. If she puts living with her parents over your health and comfort then your marriage is doomed because her priorities are in the wrong place.
As someone who keeps their house at 68 degrees year round, NTA. Move out, with or without your wife, and refuse to move back in until you have discussed and set new rules about your comfort.
NTA if you are offering to pay what’s their problem.
Or, as you suggest, just move out.
If your wife won’t force the AC issue or move out with you then you’ve got bigger problems than the temperature.
NTA
That sounds frustrating and disgusting.
I would talk to your wife and flat out offer to pay the WHOLE electricity bill and say to them “it’s the least we can do for living here! Please keep the AC on because it gets really hot and because that’s our request, we understand we should pay for it”. So it’s more about you and not how cheap they are.
If your wife doesn’t want this to happen, then explain that the smell and living conditions aren’t ideal and it might be time to sign a lease somewhere until you two buy because this isn’t sustainable.
Me and my wife have been married for a few months and we live in her parents downstairs apartments. Not because we can’t afford something but because
her parents( who are loaded ) thinks it’s silly to buy a house now and wants us to wait until mortgage rates go down…. my wife likes it this way.There. Fixed it for you.
You have a wife problem, not an in-law problem. Good luck with that, but I’m not liking your chances here.
Move out, and see whether she follows.
You’re NTA, but I’m not sure that’s any comfort.
NTA. Your wife should be taking your concerns seriously. No AC and dog waste in the house for weeks? Your breathing is going to get back and you could possibly become ill. Move back to your parents and look for a place to rent.
Rent an apartment.
Time to move out! F the mortgage rates, buy what you can afford and refi later when the rates come down. As long as you are under their roof, you are in bondage. You need your financial freedom, and your air quality freedom! AND, your wife needs to prioritize you/your relationship over her parents. That’s called a marriage, it’s why you took vows.
Pack your things, put as much in storage as you need to, and go stay with your parents. Don’t belabor the point, just go.
NTA Please leave: it’s not safe nor sanitary to stay there.
Tell your wife, you are her family now. It is time to leave her mommy and daddy and support her husband.
NTA If purchasing a house isn’t in the cards right now, then go find yourself a nice reasonably priced apartment. Tell your wife you’re moving out and she can either help you find something that she’ll be comfortable with as well or you’re going to choose something on your own. Personally, I would make it a fair distance from her parents.
NTA – But I’m not sure 🤔 how good your chances are. Your best bet is to move out and put your foot down now! I know you don’t want to but you’re gonna have to do it and make a stand. As it was said earlier you don’t have an in-law problem you have a wife problem.
You don’t need her parents permission to purchase your own house. Adult up and move out.