I’ll be 24 next month and I am a self proclaimed loser. I still live with my parents and I recently quit my job due to mental health. The longest I’ve stayed at a job is 3 years and it was a shitty fast food restaurant. I have no college education and I’m having a hard time finding another job… I just got back on my meds for anxiety and depression so I thought maybe I’d be able to hold a job now. I’m just lost… my sisters are all doing well… buying houses, having kids, law school, about to finish high school. And then there’s me. My life is so fucked up and so is my brain. I can’t talk to people or have friends or relationships because I always manage to self isolate… despite me being likable I’ve never felt good enough. I’m just lost and I’ve never been this depressed… I’m not posting this for any other reason other than advice so please don’t think I feel sorry for myself because I feel like I brought this on myself. I’m just alone and need advice. Please, no overly harsh comments as I’m already hard enough on myself.
23 and I’m a loser.
r/Advice
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Bro i just moved back in with my mom and im 25 life not easy. Both my sisters went to college i didnt , only in the military , but go at your own pace bro. I am a introvert so life was hard there but remember you can do anything. Try to talk to close people or friends it helps.
Are you working with a therapist? You would benefit from someone who really understands your challenges. Please find someone you can open up to.
I’m 43 and a loser. You get used to it after a while, I guess. Remember that life is not a competition, and even though we’re losers, we’re still probably better off than most of humanity ever has been. I have a brother that’s a senior director for a large company, and I have a brother that’s worse off than me. I wish both of them well.
As far as depression goes, do try to make a routine out of exercising. It’ll help a lot. Some research indicates it works as well, if not better than, antidepressants. You’re also not necessarily stuck being a loser. You can pull out of it. Even if you don’t, it’s not the end of the world.
You may want to consider therapy and see if you need a referral for a diagnosis. My son is on the autism spectrum and suffers many of the things you bring up. There are resources to help you if you know what you are dealing with. Do not lose hope. We all have problems.
25 turning 26.. first and foremost no you are not throwing your life away. You are just not following a typical game plan. You seem like a nice middle ground between me and my sister. For comparison-
She is 21 and refuses to get help when she clearly is struggling on the verge of homelessness, has more debt piled up than I do in retirement,drinks weekly and gets drunk and goes home with men like a local well you know. Caused me to have to unfriend my own sister. I mean I rebounded myself a bit of my history
18 to 19 I wasn’t able to afford anything I was in a bad place mentally like I ran out of the house with my go bag one night bad, I was struggling hard and loved in with family and slowly built up the start my life first it was at a factory them I became a heavy equipment operator but I realize that’s not what I want to do with my life based on how it drained me.. fast-forward a year and some and I’ve somehow grown from someone on the verge of being held back at school to applying to a European university in a month. You decide your path and I’m certain you have more potential.
We could talk privately if you wish , but I got faith you will realize all is not lost on your own time
Do you smoke weed? If you do, quit. 23 and living at home is not even bad in this current generation. Gone are the days of affordable housing. Don’t focus on that or how well others are doing and stick to what’s productive/will move you forward best you can
Getting down on yourself becomes self-fulfilling, don’t beat yourself up. I have some of the same issues and older than you, just trying to help. It’s you against you, you are not competing against anyone else. You become what you think about to a large extent
Got a couple of couches but, I sleep on the loveseat
i live with my mom for the majority of my life. i’m just 22 years old and i only had one job it barely even counts. i dropped out of high school.
You’re not a loser and life isn’t a contest. You just need to figure out what works for you. It’s not always obvious. Don’t beat yourself up. Try to figure out what your strengths are and play into them. I wasn’t happy with where my life was at your age so I went back to college, moved to a city where I knew nobody and started a new life. There are lots of other people you meet in college doing the same thing. Get a plan going, however vague and try to build on it.
Life sucks when you have no direction. Goals make a big difference, just like weekends are meaningless when you have no job to return to on Monday, goals give the weeks and months more definition.
Hi, I’m 29 and I’m a loser too. My girlfriend and our two kids live in my mom’s back yard because the economy is ass and I broke my back. So now I lost the only job I ever liked to a dumb ass back injury.
But that’s not the point.
We’re not ACTUALLY losers. We just need to stop comparing ourselves to others and take this as a sign to really crack down on our mental health. Because we deserve to be kind to ourselves. Everyone in life freaks out at some point. We had ours early. Yeah– there might be more. But take it for what it is. Let your emotions serve their purpose but don’t let them hold you back. Because a life lived in fear is a life not lived.
Much love, loser ❤️
Great chance your brain activity is being reduced by your depression. Get your meds sorted as perfectly as possible so your brain has the best chance to make the best choices
I know you are having hard times. Never put yourself down. Remember this will pass. I grew up in poverty. I was a child labor. I was able to graduate from High school. I was verbally abused from work (not in USA). I was away from my family. I worked as a server, cashier, dishwasher and crappy jobs. Then I applied to hotels and got hired. After COVID my current job found me on LinkedIn. Now I work as a manager in nyc. Making over 100k with high school degree. And my parents were living in another country did their paperwork and we are living together. Living with your parents is not a bad thing. They always love you and support you. Try to find some jobs that can suit you. For example it can be a military, waiter, Uber driver etc. Be optimistic. You got this.
I was in the exact same situation, except I was 25.
I was very suicidal, and so lost in depression that I just wanted out anyway possible.
I chose to go back to school and to see a therapist. The medication took away my depression after a lot of trial and error. And school gave me a goal to strive for which is so important.
Just pick a direction and go.
You’re not a loser. Live with your parents as long as you can and try to save your money.
You’re in the VERY early phases of your adulting journey. Don’t be so hard on yourself.
There’s a lot you can do. Look for apprenticeship programs that offer job placement. Try to Google what’s available in your area or go to https://www.apprenticeship.gov/
Focus on your own life journey, not others. Comparison is the theft of joy.
Maybe eat healthier can improve your emotions.
You’re still young man. I’m 24 living with my mom and I have a daughter who I get to see every other weekend while my gf and I live separately and cant see each other at all. I have no education and didnt even graduate high school, but it gets better. It only can. It’s great you got a job. Keep at it and save up as much as you can and invest in your future for everything you need first. Takes sacrifice. You got this homie
I wish my parents were alive to move back in with sometimes!
Any hobbies? Make friends through hobbies. Stay diligent in education if you wanna grind that out, have a degree and get a proper job that respects you more than fast food (because fast food doesn’t respect any of its workers)
25, living at home with low bills I’m sure, and low debt I’m sure too. Focus on that. Some people are 25 living the dream but are neck deep in debt. Some people are 25 going out to party every night knowing damn well they don’t get any girls but act like they do. Don’t fall for the illusion
Your generation has it the hardest. Raised glued to technology and hand fed your whole life. You need to get off meds, face life directly, grow up. Start learning, start growing, get to the gym. Otherwise you’re going to continue to feel this then health problems will surface. It’s not easy….but it sucks feeling like that doesn’t it? Wouldn’t tyou love to wake up feeling bright, happy, ready to kick some a$$?
Grind, fight, overcome. Stop numbing your brain. Get a pen and paper, write down things you’d like to do in life, what kind of jobs you’d love to do, how you can get there. I was also a late bloomer, decided to wake up, and have done some awesome things! Make more than most of my friends now. So many more awesome things to come! Keep leveling up in life, everything else is just noise
Holy shit. Get the fuck over yourself. The global economy is fucked who cares your living with your parents, most people are, your 24 not 40.
Take it one day at a time, stay on your meds, go back to the therapist, research job options, fuck go back to school.
I’m 29 as of yesterday & I felt the same at your age, multiple degree drop outs, working shit jobs.
What changed? I chose a career that had long term security, nursing & here I am now. 29, happily married with 2 beautiful daughters.
Will I make as much money as my two sisters? No never, my parents? Fuck no I won’t. And that’s fine.
I was a loser at 23 too. Now I make 30,000 every month. Give or take. U got this babe. U just gotta find your way. Love and prayers your way. I also dropped out of college. I was lost until I was 30. I’m 36 now. U will get through it. Don’t give up.
For background, I am a licensed therapist and someone who has struggled for most of my life with mental health. Not saying this makes me qualified to give advice or that I know what is best for you.
Anyways~
It is super easy to find “evidence” for a lie you keep telling yourself. “Loser” is a subjective term. What might be more realistic is to say that you aren’t satisfied with your current circumstances. That can be changed, and you’re already working on that. The next step is to stop saying you’re a loser. It isn’t easy, but if you can commit to that, I truly believe things become much easier. Self hatred / judgment is one of the heaviest things to carry, so try to lighten the load before you try to make an assessment of who you are.
Take care of yourself 🙂
The biggest theft of joy is comparing yourself to the people around you. At 24 there’s still so much ahead of you. Think of something you enjoy doing as a hobby or past time and invest your time into it. Even if it’s something as baking goods or making food people will enjoy you making for them.
Many of us were losers, too. The good thing about hitting rock bottom is realising almost any effort you put in will lead to an improvement.
Memorize how it feels to be at your absolute worst, and make it your goal to claw your way out.
It sounds like you’re going through a tough time, but acknowledging that is already a big deal! Just know that life isn’t a race; we all have our own timelines. Try to take small steps towards what you want, and don’t hesitate to lean on those who care about you.
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Wow, you’re awesome! You’ve had a job that last 3 years. I’m 25, and my longest job was only a year and a half.
Everyone is different. Don’t feel anxious about your differences. I’ve been through your situation. Don’t be afraid of losing, enjoy the experience. That’s my advice.
And I don’t know how good is enough. But I think you’re great for being willing to share your struggles.
If it’s because of health, you’re not a loser. We all face set backs. The only time one is a loser is when they let themself be one.
Not trying to be rude but it seems self pity has taken you over. You gotta keep your head up and think positive! Your are the only one that can pull yourself out of feeling that way. Many people without college degrees land good jobs and make good money. You’ll only get out of life what you put in it! Keep trying and don’t stop! Remain positive and things will work out for you.
23 is young. You’re a kid. Dont call yourself a loser, ever. Dont compare yourself to others. I’ve fallen on my face so many times I can’t list them all on this post.
Im 51, I got my, Bachelors in engineering at 28, I got married at 37, Im starting a masters program this year. I make 175k per year. I just got my black belt in judo. I have 3 kids.
But heres the “shit that binds” the story together: I got kicked out of school my first year, I got divorced, I’ve lost my job 3x, at 32 I was back in my parents house.
Never ever ever quit never give up
It’s hard to see others thriving while you’re struggling, but remember that everyone’s journey is different. Quitting a job for your mental health was a brave choice! Focus on what makes you happy and try to connect with people who understand what you’re going through.
Don’t label yourself like that.
Don’t slap words on yourself that you will become, like loser.
You’re a 24 year old who will work hard every day to find your purpose and happiness. Life is ahead of you.
You’re not a loser, you’re just in a rough patch. You’re back on meds, that’s already a step forward. Focus on small wins: routine, apply to one job a day, maybe try temp work or certs to build momentum. Everyone’s timeline is different, stop comparing yourself to your sisters. Keep pushing, you’re not stuck forever.
You’re still ten years from the peak. You have plenty of time to become whatever you aspire to be. One day at a time is good enough if every day brings you closer to your supreme self.
You have challenges nobody else besides yourself (and Jesus if your Christian) understand. Can I let you in on a little secret? It doesn’t matter how successful you are in life, how accomplished you are, how many kids you have, how much you make a year, or where you are living. Nobody is immune to feeling alone, isolated, and depressed. I’m a Dad who has been divorced and let me tell you I too at that time felt like the worlds biggest loser.
Suggestions: force yourself to get out. I had to do this. It was not fun. Whether with friends or being alone, you just need to go for a long drive to a place secluded and let your brain reset. I discovered I like to go fishing for this very reason. Give yourself a goal each day. If you ever have a day that is not productive it will be very hard to forgive yourself and think you are worthless. Whether it is changing a lightbulb or going for a walk, make at least one goal of completing at least one productive task each day and it will get easier to build your self worth.
Faith. I don’t want to go into details and have no intentions of offending your beliefs, but participating in any faith whether you believe in it or not is good for meditation and community involvement. These places are usually filled with people who only have a desire to lift you up and help you be a better you. If you ever feel like that place is not doing just that for you try a different one until you find a good fit.
And lastly, and this is the most important. Do not compare yourself to anyone else. That is not fair. Nobody has lived your exact same life, has the exact same mental health struggles, and grew up in the exact same conditions. Do not worry what your siblings are doing with their lives and compare yourself to their achievements. Only focus on improving you and becoming a better you.
Dude, I hope you know that people in Europe stay with their parents until their early 30s, also no one has a similar life to any other person, in any regard. No one has the same struggles the same way you do, no one focuses on the same things you do, no one frets the things that are always on your mind. Just try to center yourself and find a grounding in someway; make your bed every morning, and then you already started by accomplishing something. Build off that, start building skills in some way, enroll in community college classes, if you’re good at it then go to uni, if you aren’t then you have knowledge. Just don’t ever let off the pedal of improving yourself, please do not let yourself fall into the vacuum of being a failure and “missed the boat” mentality of not being soon enough to do anything to have a good life, because that’s not true. People our age are felons, jailed, or dead; you’re alive and (hopefully) healthy, you have the world at your feet and just need to lock in and just try to break the depression cycle. It sucks for a few weeks of just “pretending” to not be depressed, but eventually your body cracks out of it and you find yourself recognizing your progress and it is an insanely good feeling. Please DM me because I know how you feel.
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My Gordo is almost entirely black with some white patches in his fur. He has almost baby soft semi long fur. His fur feels like silk or mink and it feels as though he never lost his baby kitten fur.
He also blends into surprisingly well.
My Mattie has short white goldenish colored fur.
Both my babies are well fed and love each other, kind of I think.
Because I think he’s not very bright, Mattie has always wanted a friend a buddy and he has one in Gordo.
When Gordo was still a baby Mattie loved on him and his 5 sisters.
Mattie loved cleaning them napping with them playing with them, he was kitty hog heaven with those kittens.
He might not be very bright but I think because of that he has a very loving nature.
Go into a trade it sounds like you are better working with your hands(plummer is a good choice)
I feel like it’s impossible to be a loser at 24 unless you ended up in jail or something – you have your whole life ahead of you. If you’re 30+ and no job and in the same situation sure.
There is absolutely no reason to feel like a loser at 24. The job market is fd right now too.
Also having a job for 3 years straight at 24… dude you’re 24, most people haven’t worked for 2 years yet.
You do need to stop self sabotaging yourself and get motivated to do something.
I suggest working on your self image. Specifically working out daily, maybe doing some yoga or something relaxing outdoors like hiking.
Force yourself out the out of the house. Sitting around the house can be relaxing but you need to improve something about yourself everyday.
Once your habits daily habits are fixed and your motivated by something – working out, hiking whatever it’s an easier step to be at motivated to grind for a job.
It seems like you’re being too harsh on yourself. Especially since you keep comparing yourself to your sisters. My only advice is that you focus on yourself. Take it step by step. Celebrate your victorys no matter how small.
Comparison is joy killer. I can relate to this so much. Im 26 used to work at restaurants still do part time. Went back to uni at 23 finishing my bachelors soon. Got a corporate job and i realized how shitty it is to work at restaurants. You gotta find something you want to work towards to or maybe something that youre good at. Math, literature, biology, chemistry anything its never too late to go back to school and get a degree trust me
What I’ve done is find an outlet you can put your frustrations into like writing, art, singing/rapping, ect. It doesn’t matter if your completely awful at it but if you enjoy it and your able to share you negative thoughts in a positive way you’ll be fine
I’m 27 and still live with my mother. My brother is my only friend aswell.
All of these you can over come. They all start with you. You have to force yourself into a better position mentally. It’s the absolute hardest thing you will ever do. Speaking from experience.
One piece of advice my dad gave me is that you cannot judge your life and your progress based on others. I am 26 and I live at home with my parents still. My best friend is married and bought a house last year. My other best friends have children or are engaged, while I am still single. It’s always better to measure your life based on things you have done based on those you haven’t. For example, you recognized a problem and got back on your meds and quit a job that was affecting you negatively. You may have worked fast food, but 3 years is a commitment that you worked through! The job market is rough for everyone right now, so I would not be hard on yourself if you cannot find the perfect one or one at all. You’re so young and have so much more life to live! It really does get better on the other side (: You’ve got this!
Nah. Your sisters have extreme RESPONSIBILITIES coming their way.
You are young and still have family to help you as you figure things out.
You aren’t a loser.
Tap into your interests and passions. They say your calling is something that comes easy to you that is hard for others. Lean into that.
You don’t need a college degree to make tons of money. If I could do it all over again, I’d love back home, save money Start a little business from scratch on Etsy…
Keep dreaming, and don’t be too hard on yourself. Start jogging, working out, eating clean. Drop the meds and then you will inherently keep moving up from there.
Your lowest is the best place to be- why? Because you can only go up. You got this!
Just turned 23 and I can feel for you. Although, I would not call yourself a loser. The only reason you feel that way is because you are comparing yourself to others. Comparison is the thief of joy.
I still live at home as well and all I do is play video games and work. I had an apartment at one point but it was with someone else and I ended up having to move back home. Everyone lives their lives at a different pace, and everyone has different journeys pathed for them. There is no need to compare and make yourself feel less. Learn to be proud of the little things and know that everyone has their own battles in life.
This tough time of depression will pass, but take this time to focus on making yourself happy. Stop comparing your life to others. You cannot compare a peony to a tulip, to which both are beautiful in their own ways. Take things at your own pace and prioritize YOUR happiness. I am proud of you for stepping away from a job for your own mental health. That is something a lot of people struggle to do. Especially with the pressure society puts on us to work our lives away instead of living them.
Live your life how you want, be kind to others, and most importantly, be kind to yourself.
You are loved by Jesus Christ! Do not even speak that negativity over yourself. Find somewhere isolated and pray ceaselessly for what you want. Ask Jesus to guide you to a church where you can meet other Christians and fellowship. If you have social anxiety like me, ask God for comfort and mental strength and confidence. Watch God work it out, but remember that faith without works is dead. God can break this stronghold over you, but give him a reason to. Try to stop living in sin and aim to follow Jesus and his commandments (10 commandments). Read your Bible (King James version (a couple chapters)) and pray daily.
What I’ve done is find an outlet you can put your frustrations into like writing, art, singing/rapping, ect.
Being 23 and your longest job is 3 years is pretty good. And being fast food isn’t bad. I worked at fast food and was able to buy my first house. But it took tons of saving. And crying. I have mental health issues. But I always make work a priority because with no job I cant survive and living with my family isn’t an option.
I didn’t move out until I was 27 and right after I turned 30 I had to move back in…talk about loser LOL honestly don’t be so hard on yourself. I struggle with mental health a lot too and society and people really underestimate how much it affects you. I would suggest therapy and consider trying anti-depressants if you haven’t already. Whether you do or not, the intention of wanting to better yourself and taking steps to do that goes a long way to change your outlook. Listening to some audiobooks about life, finding the meaning of life, and stuff like that can also help. Also make sure you’re doing your regular physicals just to make sure there’s no underlying health issues going on either that you’re not aware of yet. The job market sucks right now, so just do whatever you can. Luckily you have your parents to lean on while you figure things out, your life happens on your timeline, no one else’s, so just live for yourself and take it one step at a time!
I am praying for you. I want you to find YOUR spark. Know that family is where you should be so don’t feel bad. Be in the midst if positive people and never loose sight of mental health . It’s so important.Do you have insurance? If so look into MDLive for therapy. You’re going to be okay.
I finally started improving and living my life at 25. Ones things start moving for you you’ll be making progress in ways you never thought possible.
Try not to be a loser at 30. Good luck.
You’re comparing yourself to those around you. Stop putting so much pressure on yourself dude, you still got so much time to figure out things. Life isn’t a competition, it’s a journey and unfortunately there are tough times, they’re inevitable but they don’t last forever.
Set yourself goals every day to improve your lifestyle, then set yourself goals every week, and every month. Within no time you’ll be back on track my guy. Can’t get in your head, I know it’s easier said than done as I know the mental health struggles all too well myself, but you gotta dig deep and start small with positive change. Don’t think long term with these opportunities for improvement, that is what can be discouraging. Little things each day will build your confidence, and once you get the ball rolling there will be no stopping you, I promise you that. Never hesitate to reach out to those who will support you, a support network is very helpful as well
It’s never too late to start again. I’ve read stories of people in their 50s or even older starting fresh and completely changing their lives. You’re only 23, you’ve got so much time ahead of you. It’s okay to feel envious when you see others doing well, but don’t ever ever let that weigh you down. Instead, use it as fuel to push yourself further.
Everyone’s path moves at a different pace, and just because you’re not where you want to be right now doesn’t mean you won’t get there. Small steps forward still count! and over time they add up.
If it makes you feel better I’m 21 and also living this same sort of life.
Your 24 so you still have your time to figure it out. That being said try going to the gym if you aren’t. Going to the gym and lifting weights.
Make it a full time job for you to find a a job. Between this and the gym you won’t have time to be stressed/depressed.
I’m 27 and still with my parents. If you’re in a situation where you can’t move out make the most of it:
Exercise, practice, study, invest, etc. If you’re not living on your own you can at least better yourself.
There was a time when we only cared about eating, making children and pooping in the grass.
Now we have to deal with insane amounts of pressure, anxiety and expectations even though we’re all bones and worms in the end. And that’s the starter it can even crazier if you choose to. Take your time and take care of yourself, not for the others but for you. You might meet crazy success now, later or never. Some will be at the top and fall, some will stay at the top, some will never reach it. Your time here is too short for you to obsess over expectations. Try things you feel like trying, stay healthy and go on.
Its okay to be a loser in the first half of your twenties. If you make an effort to change your condition regularly, the later half would start to make sense and by the time you reach 30 you will blend right in with the people you now consider successful. It wont be easy and you have to make an effort for it.
But if you sit arround doing nothing you will grow up to be a 30 year old baby with no experience, no knowledge acquired from own mistakes and nobody will want you to be arround them. Everyone except your parents will love you or judge you based on your abilities and what you bring on to the table.
Your twenties is the most vital decade to experiment, fail and learn to be a true adult with sufficient knowledge, skill and experience to survive today’s wild society.
Everyone blooms at a different time and age.
Just work on yourself. Work out, Pick up a hobby, Establish a system of repetition, Fill the vessel instead of being empty.
Reading classic literature helps because what has been repeats and occurs again.
Bro im literally 24 no college at all 5 years of high school and finally just finding what i migjt want to do at least for a while til im ready to move on which is in the trade field. Ask a union and get apprenticeship for free and paid while i learn. We are young i live with my grandma right now but i look at it like this, some people dont find what they want in life til like 50s and thats fine as long as you enjoy and learn from the ride along the way.
Putting yourself down doesnt achieve anything and as someone who thought it was corny, telling yourself aspirations and good things really does change how you view the world and yourself. The mind is a crazy thing the more you tell yourself something or hear something the more you believe it and exhibit those traits…. so why not rewire your mind to exhibit good traits by telling yourself you are worth it, you are not a loser, you arent beneath anyone just as no one is beneath you, you may have struggles but we all do, you have time, of course you dont want to take your time and wait too long but you also dont need to rush right now.
Also as someone who attempted a few times, self isolating may seem helpful right now but trust me in the long run youll wish you hadnt so much…. just communicate your struggles with people you care about and people who care about you and im sure theyll understand. I lost friendships due to isolation and i dont blame them. We are social creatures, isolation is only good to a small degree.
You’re barely 23, when I was 23 (30 now) I felt the same way when I was your age, the beautiful thing is that you are in control of your future and it’s not too late to make a difference you just need to have and pursue your goals, what you want to accomplish and make it happen, obviously take baby steps so you don’t feel overwhelmed and before you know it you’ll cross that bridge.
You’re not a loser at 23, you’re still finding your way. I was in the same boat at 23 — couldn’t hold a job, had lots of issues with anxiety and depression, terrible social skills and never dated etc. I didn’t really find myself at all till about 27 and it’s still a process. You’re incredibly young, and you seem self aware — use this to work on yourself. And for god sakes have some compassion and patience with yourself — you’ve definitely got time.
I lived with family till 28, I paid rent and thought it was me helping lowering their mortgage. Moved out to grow since I thought it was time. So even if you live with your parents, try to contribute not just for them but for yourself worth.
First you have to look at yourself, where you at, what you’d like to do. Focusing on other people will throw you off, you’ll find yourself jumping from one thing to another not realizing it is what they like not you.
23 is pretty young, am 100% sure there are people over 50 yo and doing worse than you and some change for the better.
Even when you lose your job and busy looking, find time to run or just walk outside. It helps releasing anxiety.
Bruh, im 36 and live with my parents. And I make 40+ an hour.
If you’re likable and you know it then you’re way ahead of a lot of us!
I may have a good (enough) job, but I’m horrible and barely tolerated! You can’t have everything in life.
Here is another mindset I can give you :
You have the chance of having supporting parents…
Tell them you are discouraged and feel helpless and tell them you love them and wants to improve.
Then work and find a career while you live at home with parents ! You are living the dream and you do not see it !!
Many people dont have this luxury, they run hopelesa jobs and cannot change career or its very difficult.
It sure will be difficult for you too but home and parents help and love is gold.
Find something to career in ! Tell you parents about it !
growing up is the greatest thing a person can do. I lived with my folks on and off until my mid 30s, so I can totally relate.
Mental health crippled my desire to try, because all my peers seemed to just hop and skip and jump towards successes.
Be kind and graceful to yourself and don’t adapt to anyone else’s pace
Only up from here
Find what you love to do and do that. Period
Money is not everyones key. But its different than forty yrs ago. So my words may not fit your desires.
When I was 23 I had a major disaster in my professional life. It’s worse than anything on this list tbh but I’m now very successful in my education ( MD PhD). You’re at the age where you have a choice to pick yourself up and do better than ever or put yourself down. Things you don’t have that are not holding you back
You’re Not doing Bad you just haven’t got where you want to be yet.
Comfort doesn’t motivate. Comfort kills ambition. The fact that you are not comfortable means you have ambition. You have desire.
Here’s what you do.
One step in front of the other; repeat.
You got this. You have a supporting family where you can base out of as you make moves to advance.
Junior college might be a good option to get some basic courses out of the way, if you want to earn a degree.
Or you can look into a trade and take the courses, apprentice and learn a trade.
Plenty of options.
Do not judge yourself or compare yourself with others! Focus on yourself and if you wish to be better — then be better tomorrow than you were today.
You got this OP, even if you’re singing that Beck song with all your gusto … and you have the ability to make it.
I believe in you!!
Take a walk, find a new outdoor hobby.
Have you looked into temp agencies? Sometimes easier to get your foot in the door and less pressure since everyone knows it’s temporary to start.
Your sisters are on totally different timelines. Some people figure it out at 18, others at 30. Doesn’t make you a loser, just means you’re taking a different path
Try to get a government job. Public works, library or school etc. You will not be rich but can live a good life and be proud of yourself. Do not compare yourself to others. Just manage your own life. You are young make good choices and things will change for you.
“You’re perfect just the way you are, but there’s always room for improvement”
Society puts this idea in our heads that we have to tick a bunch of boxes in order to be worthy, to hit some imaginary goal posts. But, it’s just an idea. You entered this world as something truly precious, as you will continue to be when you depart. You never stopped being precious, you just don’t recognise it.
You’re never a fixed thing, in fact, we’re all constantly changing, moment by moment. It’s hard work, but you have the power within you to continuously grow and discover a fulfilling path through life. It begins with developing self-compassion and self-belief. As others have mentioned therapy is a great place to start.
Having an introvert is your strength because it helps you find your interest and niche easily.
And when you know about yourself you can make your life easier.
In short just find out your interest and passion that is always with you even if you are an introvert.
Remember this – your God and your ability is always with you. Every successful man feels alone at a point of life.
You’ll be fine mate. I’m 32 and college educated and still working a dead end job that I hate. I have mental health issues and I’m an alcoholic. My relationship is based on a fantasy that might not work out in the end. I’m incredibly anxious and awkward in social situations including with my own family and friends if I haven’t been drinking. At the end of the day some of us are just wired differently. I’d give my left nut to be 23 again. Embrace the weird and dive into the things you’re actually interested in. Life is too short to give a fuck what other people think to be honest.
I think you need to remember 24 is still young and that most people struggle in their twenties as they’re figuring themselves out. You’re not a loser you’re just in a difficult spot. Be nicer to yourself. Not everyone grows at the same pace, remember this and have a little patience.
You’re still very young, a lot can happen in the next few years or maybe longer. Like a lot of other people said, life is a marathon not a race so you might as well go at your own pace because a lot of people that you see successful / winning at life can burn out just as fast. While you’re with your parents it would be best to take the time and find yourself and find a career path that you can find joy in at least enough that you don’t hate going to work everyday. Be grateful for what you have now because it’s a lot better than a surprising amount of people have. It does get better.
i am 22 and a loser. been abused by mom, dad and stepdad ever since i was a child plus divorce trauma at the age of 7. i am not trying to put the blame on this event for my shitty life but my family still continues to abuse me mentally. they always make me feel like i never do anything right and if i do it seems like they only care if i do something that benefits them, if i do something for myself its a crime. for example in june i got a loan and bought marshall headphones and my stepdad went apeshit saying stuff like i only care about my own well being and even hit me. being raised in the abusive family it is very hard to defend myself, even verbally. i have ptsd from childhood and cant do shit to protect myself. all this caused me to fall into depression and i have been dealing with it for years now. i do have a job, i am a warehouse supervisor at Dunkin but i hate it because my coworkers are bitchy and the job doesnt pay me, plus its not my dream job, my dream job is to become a writer, i am very talented and ambitious but publishing companies ignore my mails and requests because apparently i actually use my fantasy and write books about something other than gay rights and holocaust. i have always had sial thoughts but during the last few months i started having anger issues. the only thing i feel is anger and hatred towards everyone. i used to be a devoted christian but my depression caused me to become an atheist or believe that if god he exists he is a piece of shit sadist. i do not see any other way than to end my life. i hope i dont make it till 2026
Self worth should not be tied to how clever you are at playing the capitalist game. We all must play it, but it doesn’t need to define our value. Don’t think of yourself as a loser. Be yourself.
Pick a direction (choose carefully) and work hard at it.
Nothing is guaranteed but once you find the path you will know that you’re on it and the striving toward that goal makes you a winner.
You don’t have to go to college, but you need to get a marketable skill, that will get you a good job. Take an aptitude test, it will point you the direction that has good jobs to look for.
I live with my family. I am 32 and second in command in a company with 50+ employees
I’m also a loser but I was once a winner so that means it’s possible to return to it.
Things that can help uplift your mood:
Sitting in sunsine every morning and through the day. Avoid sunburns.
Healthy eating. Have plenty salads, vegetable, fish, eggs.
Supplement with high grade fish oil and natural B vitamin complex. The biggest dose reccomended.
Listen to uplifting songs. Sing along or at least humm.
Watch self improving videos or read such books.
Get a new haircut, clothes.
Clean your room. Learn to fix things around the house.
Offer help to your parents.
Good luck!
Don’t compare yourself to others. You are completely different people with different strengths and weaknesses.
When I was your age I was stuck in a mail room job earning $18 an hour.
Now I’m 40, earning $28 an hour doing a security job with no prospects of home ownership living with my wife, no kids. Not the best job but has its positives.
Life is not a race, life is not measured by success or what you have.
What you see from others is probably 2% of their life.
Be kind to yourself. You’re not a loser.
Get away from social media, start pushing yourself to some form of workout everyday, sit and meditate and start to write your thoughts on a notepad daily-very basic journaling. But do these things each day every day- see it as the process of someone you can be proud of.
Keep thinking and trying things, keep failing. Think of things you would like to learn and then try them even if you think you are terrible at it.
24 in nothing in the grand scheme of things, think of life in more long term. It must to hard to see siblings seemingly do so well and compare but remember your story is different to theirs so your path will look different.
If you do minor small things differently every day, they will compound heavily and you can change your reality very fast.
Once you start actioning on it and just facing tough things, you will gain respect for yourself and be able to work with the low self worth issue.
Discuss with close friends and family how you are feeling, many times their experiences can help you learn a lot to implement as well.
Hope this helps.
I’m 25. I couldn’t hold a job for longer than 6 months before I turned 21 and went into EMS. I’ve lived with my mom and still do. I’m about to finish paramedic school, and then I’ll probably move out. You’re not a loser, you’re still just searching for what you want to do with your life and sometimes it takes time. Something I struggle with and still do is I feel like I’m way behind in life when I’m actually doing okay. Sure, other people my age are buying houses or doing this or doing that. Most of those people come from families with money, or they’re in a shit load of debt.
Hi! I would begin by exercising and reading or learning something or even starting a hobby that requires you to develop a skill (I like to play pool). I would say starting here will help you build self confidence and learn to work towards a goal. I’d say focus on discipline.
Sorry man, I was in your place around that age also.
My friend in his mid 30s still live with his parents. In this economy it’s tough.
If you like concerts and stuff, I recommend try joining an AV tech company. You can find many at hotels and event centers. They’ll hire anyone as long as they’re willing to work. I did it for 7 years and then moved on to becoming a camera op, video specialist, camera director.
You got this man, just have to find a job that suits you
Hey 🤍 dont talk down on yourself like that, words are very powerful. You are NOT a lover.. life is extremely challenging at the best of times we are all just doing the best we can, sometimes even when we think we are stagnant we are right where we’re meant to be. Don’t be so hard on yourself, you are very young and things can change at anytime be kind to yourself, your on your own timeline nobody else’s.
Im 31 and still living with my parents. No way to get out of here. As far as depression goes, animals really help me. Maybe you can find a dog in the neighbourhood you can walk every day at a set time. This way you need to get out and gives you some routine. Also the dog will cheer you up 100%.
2 words .
David goggins.
1 audio book. And a pair of sneakers.
Cant Hurt Me.
Comparison is the thief of all joy.
But self hatred isn’t the answer but it can be the start.
List everything you don’t like about yourself and also write down where you want to be, it’s okay if you don’t have all the answers right away… you feel like you’re at rock bottom which is actually a great thing because you can’t get any lower!
When you have that list write out how you’re going to change it and give yourself a time line etc:
.I don’t like the fact I don’t have friends- I will join one of those meet app groups or join a fb group to meet new people (I will aim to meet one new person each month)
.i don’t like the way I talk so negatively about myself- I will talk about the things i do like each day infront of a mirror
.i don’t like the fact I don’t have a job- I will apply for a new job every other day for the next 6 months and inbetween that time I will help with housework to keep myself busy.
These are a few examples I would give you based on what you wrote out.
Your self worth is really low and it’s heartbreaking to hear someone talk about themselves like that because you are good enough and everyone has different walks of lives plus you’re still young and have so much to offer.
So start small start meditating so that these thoughts are background for you and it helps keep you feeling good.
For a daily plan I would give you something like this:
.start the day with a meditation that keeps you out of your mind.
.move your body, be it yoga or a quick 15/30 minute workout it helps start your day and also helps with depression and anxiety.
.get a good breakfast down you, food heals.
.get showered and do some self care.
.brush your teeth and afterwards speak to yourself in the mirror, tell yourself 3 things you like/love about yourself.
.apply for 1 job
.deep clean one room in the house.
.get yourself out on a walk and smile at people as you walk past and make it a mission to ask one person about their day.
.talk to family members.
.drink lots of water.
. Feeling bad then either meditate again or yoga.
.go to sleep at a good time
Let me start by directly saying that you are NOT a loser. Your life as an adult has barely begun! I know you feel tempted to compare yourself to others, especially when you see all the highlights but that is very damaging.
At 24 I was studying and living at home. I had a hard time getting my footing as an adult and it took me a while to find a job I really enjoyed. That only happened 8 years ago (I‘m almost 40 btw). I also lived with my parents for a long time, on one hand because I liked it but on the other to save money for an apartment.
You can and will get there but you need to detach your mind from seeing life as a constant list of achievements you need to have by a certain age.
I’m sure you have tons of things to be proud of. Take it easy and take one step at a time.
Healthiest thing you can do for yourself is to stop comparing yours to others.
Do your on thing at your own pace and set goals fitting to your currently avaliable options.
Bro you’re going through something really tough, and the fact that you’re aware of it and reaching out for advice shows a lot of strength. Getting back on your meds is a huge step in the right direction, and healing takes time. Please don’t compare your journey to your sisters’, everyone’s timeline is different, and where you are right now doesn’t define where you’ll be in the future. Start small, be gentle with yourself, and focus on little wins each day. You’re not alone, and things can get better.
I’m 32 & still live with my mother .
But also to add we shouldn’t call ourselves losers or our ourselves down , it only makes matters worse
Join a gym!
Rotting in your room won’t help
We all do jobs we don’t like (95%+)
If nothing changes then how can anything change
Your brain isn’t broken, it’s just tired of faking normal for free.
Maybe this will help. Your mentality is everything. Don’t call yourself a loser because you are feeling down. You’re not a losers. You are figuring it out.
You’re not a loser. Swear. You’re just young. Everyone is their 20s are finding themselves. Trying to figure out what the want and who they are.
Don’t ever give up on yourself. Life has bumps like this and you’re not alone in those bumps.
I’m the same way at 44. Don’t be too hard on yourself, you get what you’re given in life and adapt it the best you can – and unfortunately some others got a different set of potentials that they can use “better”. I’m also ADHD / Depression / Anxiety, prone to “burnout” from stress, and that really limits productivity. Start to think what you’d like to do with YOUR life, you don’t owe anybody anything, it can be small, it can be different, if it helps many people who were on the brink of hopelessness made some great startups and made huge wealth in a short time. Many “on the spectrum” people make games and tech and really complex things – who were isolated, who were socially awkward, but smart. Set yourself something and learn about it, see if that helps.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with living with your parents. I stayed with my parents until I was 28. I used to see my friends move out into apartments and feel like I was lagging behind. I wasn’t, and neither are you. I got on my feet by 30 and have never looked back. 20s are a time to find your way and gain skills. Dont be so hard on yourself. Be kind to yourself, if you can find a way to pursue a trade, degree etc – do so and focus on that and give it your best. Join a community or volunteer organization. Volunteering does help you gain perspective, too. It does get better, dont despair. I’m rooting for you. 🙏🏻
You’re not a loser, man. You’re going through a tough season, and the fact that you’re self-aware and reaching out already shows strength.
Mental health struggles are real, and it’s okay to need time to stabilize. Start with small wins, even part-time or volunteer work, just something to build structure and confidence again.
Don’t compare your path to your sisters, everyone’s timeline is different.
You’re not stuck forever, just in a chapter that will pass. Keep going, one small step at a time.
Job, education and where you live doesn’t make you a loser. Society wants you to think that so you can work your ass off and keep the economy going until you die. But being a decent person, grateful enough to enjoy little things in life and being a good friend/ partner to someone makes you a winner in life. And it’s so underrated nowadays because of all the fake happiness you see all around social media.
The truth is most young people live like you. Jobs and money will come and go, if you’re smart enough to put it to good use, and focus on your health on your personal development, your vibe will change, you keep your eyes open and stay around people, at least one occasion will appear to change the game 💪🏻
If it helps i went back to uni at the age of 26. Never too late to get an education and a better job
The good news is the person who can make the difference is staring back at you in the mirror. In terms of a career, start by learning a skill. You’ll be surprised about how easy some jobs are easy to get into with qualifications that can be done online. You don’t need a degree, but start off small and learn as you go. Also, as you aren’t working now, there will never be a better time to start.
Stop thinking you need to be somewhere in life already. If you were, you’d have these hidden issues present anyways. Never compare yourself with others, that leads to anxiety. Concentrate on yourself. Figure out what you like to door would like to do. Sleep right, eat right, go for a walk, or a run. Make it a habit. Take a break from social media, read a book. Pic a sport. Don’t like the idea of college? Pic a trade, usually 1 year or less then hour off.
Mate, I’ve lived with my parents, didn’t go uni but locked in at your age and moved into a new flat with my gf, and working my dream job.
The first step is the hardest but gets easier after that
Learn a trade, ull make friends there… and that anxiety and depression shit will all go away when ur working 12 hour days
You probably need professional help, like a therapist or something. Talk therapy can help a lot, but u get what u put in. Very rarely do people just simply have a chemical imbalance… That almost always comes from being treated like trash by someone
Been there done that. Somehow it was easier then even if it felt like shit. But getting my own place and starting to build a network professionally really drove me. College is great and all, but only if you are driven and know what you want. Focus on getting a new job, something you actually like doing. And your own place. Life will happen to you from there.
I’m mostly writing this because I wish my future self where telling me it’s all going to be all right. I’m 41 now and in the process of separation, life really sucks. But it can be beyond wonderful as well. I have two beautiful daughters. So what ever happens, I have two beautiful daughter.
Hey mate it’s definitely hard becoming an adult and feels bad when you see others your age or younger achieving more than you, but that’s the thing, we need to learn not to compare ourselves with others. You can look at them and learn from them, but no point in comparing and getting our feelings hurt. You say living with your parents make you feel like a loser, but you’re actually lucky to still have shelter and family to rely on. Only move out when you know you are ready, or feel like you’re ready to take the challenge. As for feeling lost, I’ve been in that spot myself about 2 years ago. I found a life coach who also coached me in boxing and gym workouts. Using basics of boxing to guide me and compare with life situations. Right now you feeling lost means your life is not in balance, you gotta find that balance whether it’s finding job, working out, making friends, anything, you just gotta find a goal for something that can slowly build yourself up. Learn to love yourself, respect yourself, value yourself, know your own worth and stop comparing yourself to others. Believe in yourself
It takes time to work through these things my friend. I’d be willing to help you look at career and training options that might help.
Working on learning a trade… Master it.
Shit happens mate. You’ll figure it out. Most people feel like losers these days because of the looming recession.
I moved back in with my nana at the age of 26. I’m 30 now, still here. My brother is 28, married, house, dogs, baby on the way. My family compares me to him, often. I started doing it myself.
Turns out my timeline is just different than his. I’m not a loser, I’m just following my own path.
You are what you think about… remember that
I am 31! I call myself a looser too. Haven’t figured out life yet. You just defined my life in the post. Try to figure out things asap. If you want someone to talk I am here.
Do a trade like electrician
I failed in everything i did in the area i once lived in. my food business made no money, my college education was crap, couldnt join the military, my fiancee left me. I learned from everything i failed, left the area i lived in, went to the other side of the planet to teach English. I am now an academic coach, i am learning two languages, in the process of becoming a boxer, have my own apartment, and relaxing in life. sometimes, the home you grew up in has too much shit to move or people who dont value you. You got to pack your stuff and go somewhere. take arisk to do and find better. ot worked for me, maybe it can work for you. Good luck
hey dude, I’m the same age and my birthday is next month too. i finished college last year and work retail stuck in my college town. don’t be so hard on yourself
Join the military or peace corps, what you need is self confidence. No one is a looser we all have the ability to know right from wrong good vs evil. Start walking clear your mind remember you have a meaning you just need to find it!
I recently moved back in with my parents at 25, shit happens, life is tough financially in today’s world. There’s a lot more people living with their parents now than there ever was, do not feel bad or like a burden. I was in the worst place mentally last year and my mother was the one that pulled me out. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for her. Don’t be afraid to talk to them, I’m sure they want what’s best for you as well no matter how long that takes.
Oh and most importantly IT’S NEVER TOO LATE TO GO TO SCHOOL. I recently dropped out of pharmacy school after a year and a half. I’ve been in school since I was 18. I have so much regret for not slowing down and really thinking about what I wanted for my future. 5 and a half years I put into a degree including my bachelors and now I’m on step 1 again. Never feel rushed through life, comparison if the thief of joy.
Good news your only 23 and you have your life ahead of you. Try a trade that matched something that interests you. Save save save!! Really important because financial freedom will relieve your anxiety
I’m 32 ,and im just getting started. Longest job is my current job of a year n a half. (I struggled with addiction)
I now have my own place (rent but its a start) money in the bank, bought my furniture, a car, 401k, roth ira.
You have plenty of time my man!!! Oh yeah, and I did all that with just a wearhouse job in just under 2 yrs.
Best of luck to you and God bless 🙌
I hear you, im the same , just getting through life bit by bit, things will eventually change as life never stays the same from year to year, you might be posting on here in a year or 2 with a totally different outlook on life, keep strong and remember your not alone
I mean sitting there with that victim mentality feeling sorry for yourself ain’t gonna change shit. Might sound harsh but it’s reality. Reality is everyone feels stress and everyone feels depressed at times. It’s life. Everyday life is going to try beat you down. Go get a construction job, use your hands. You don’t need a college education. As hard as it is to get your ass up at 5am every morning, force yourself to do it until it becomes routine. Start working out, make sure your diet is on point, and most of all change your thought patterns. Instead of feeling sorry for yourself and focusing on everything you feel is wrong in your life, begin to be grateful for the things you do. Be happy you have parents who have the means for you to live with then, be thankful you have life and health, be thankful your have the means to make this post. Life is perspective, and you’d be surprised how much changes when you start to appreciate the small things. Keep your head up. You’ll be okay.
Comparison is the thief of joy, if you spend all your time worrying about “falling behind” then you’re not going to focus on and enjoy your own journey. Depression and anxiety are not easy, but putting effort into finding those little pockets of joy in life can make it easier. I know this probably isn’t going to solve everything for you but a lot of this helped me when I was in your shoes.
Learn to love yourself. You aren’t the material world, you are your will and actions and memories. Loving yourself leads to confidence, confidence to charisma, charisma to socialization, and socialization to connection. Most of finding a path is being connected, even if youre already in a chosen field.
Same goes for love and friendship, confidence and loving yourself is the first step. Find gratitude in what you have, acknowledge the parts of you you want to grow.
You’re being mean to yourself, but in thr same breath, acknowledging what you dont like is the only way to begin change.
Don’t feel bad, I didn’t move out till I was 32. Love yourself, fuk those haters. Be a genuine and a good person. Its tough, I would know. Just hang loose.
You are too young to call yourself a loser. Work on yourself now and revisit that word in 10 or 20 years 🤣 you have your whole life ahead of you. Don’t compare yourself to anyone.
Deep breath. You’re ok. Firstly, millions of Americans are challenged by mental health struggles at one point in their lives. Everyone takes medication for everything nowadays. Only in our country do people not support, intergenerational living. It’s common all over the globe mainly for good feelings of community and financial decisions. If your siblings chose another route, I am happy they found what works for them. You’ve given them a gift. You are now living with and supporting aging parents – even if it’s you are doing household chores.
As far as socializing, be kind to yourself. The BEST thing to do is remember 3 things. 1. exercise. This is a non negotiable. If you’re broke, go running every day. First week, start for running for five minutes and each week add one more minute. Buy a cheap jump rope. Look on youtube for jump rope exercises. Laugh with the videos on how silly it all is. Join your local YMCA as soon as you have money. They have all kinds of community classes. 2. Sleep for 8 hours every night. No more. No less. 3. Cut out bread and processed foods. What you eat directly effects your fluctuation in moods.
You did not bring this on yourself. If that was the case, we could ask anyone suffering for a disability or illness if they brought cancer onto themselves. It’s just the cards we are dealt and how we manage them. Remember Winston Churchill – Never Never Give up.
Not everyone is cut out to be a lawyer and the world wouldn’t function if they were. We need a variety of people to make a beautiful world, and you just have to find out where you would fit best. Think about how you would like to spend time if there were no pressure. Would you be indoors or outdoors? Would you be working with your hands or your mind? Do you like to work in concentrated bursts or have a routine that doesn’t change much every day? Do you like to work with a lot of new faces, the same small familiar team, a partner, or solo? These kinds of considerations will help narrow down what will make you happy and find what you’ll be good at.
Remember that getting good at things (even life) usually involves going through being bad at them, first.
Be kind to yourself.
I moved back with my mom after my ex tried to end me, we were living with my dad and after that I could not even go home without a panic attack on the driveway. I also had a very serious spinal injury that made living together a bad decision.
I often felt like a loser despite making a lot of money because it felt like it was only because dad was an important figure in the government and mom’s family is very famous that I got where I am.
But recently I realize I am very beloved, genuinely so, by so many people it feels almost like a joke. People who were willing to throw themselves in hell for me. People who I foolishly took for granted and even so stood by me.
I was a loser for failing to recognize that.
Sometimes you need to look inward. A man’s value doesn’t come from money or anything else but how much good he can do and his legacy will always be the sum of it. Money and diamonds will eventually vanish, but the lives you touch are forever changed and will change others in turn.
We should always strive for greatness and we.may never reach it. But not being the best you can, doesn’t mean you are not great as long as you keep trying to be better today than you were yesterday. Each step you take will be easier than the last and before you realize you are gonna be proud of yourself.
i’m 35 just got off drugs and am in the same boat. feeling nothing but emptiness and loneliness. life is hard for everyone.
I see two topics here.
I lived with my parents until I was 34 but I paid the bills, ran their errands for them and maintain the property for them by cutting the lawn, raking the leaves, shoveling the snow, watering the garden, taking them to the store, doctor, etc
I’m 36 and just started my career all over. I had no idea what I was doing at 24. I was fresh out of the military with my first big boy job. Took at step back from manufacturing to earn my degree at 32. My advice. You’ll learn about yourself in your 20s. You’ll figured yourself out in your 30s.
You’re not a “loser,” you’re just in a rough patch, and that doesn’t define your whole life. Starting with small steps, like keeping up with your meds, trying part-time work, or setting tiny daily goals, can slowly rebuild your confidence. It’s okay to move at your own pace and focus on yourself without comparing to your siblings. You’re already doing something important by reaching out, don’t underestimate that. Keep going, even if it’s baby steps.
Im sorry are people not allowed to feel sorry for themselves or something? I feel like all the “you’re in control of your own destiny“ people are the ones who it just worked out for. Anyone that’s been through it isn’t going to tell someone it’s all their fault. That’s just how it is for some people, others do not even understand how fortunate they are to have fallen upwards into a decent life. They will leave out tremendous details like “my parents left me 2 million dollars“ or “oh I’ve never actually had a job my husband pays for everything(his parents left him 2 million dollars)” kind of shit. I already know I’m going to delete this comment later but I’ll give y’all a little bit to berate me on how you got it out the mud building your own business that made zero dollars for 8 years while you lived in your parents second home like it was yours.
Get your ass into the gym.
Download a workout app. Get some headphones and listen to motivational speeches.
Change your brain chemistry, it sounds like you need a hard reset.
Bro. Let me give you stright and nsfw fashion way.
You are not doing good. That depression os fucking you up. You know that. But that is a good thing. That shows you are STILL sane and have good brain up there.
I was under heavy meds for depression. I know what, how , and when that basterd fuck you.
That shit kill WILL POWER. i said having depression is good, And i mean it. This mean you can fight.
My man. Look up. This life is shit. But you can handel it. This post that you drop there is screaming you can fight.
Man, “just take one step at time.” My doctors said and added ” if week you take an step, you will turn yourself into another person at end of year”
I have some suggestion, this works for me:
1- sun. Walk under son atleast 10 min a day if you can not leave house( cuse i didnt leave for 6 months )
2- gym. Hit the gym not for building a great figur. Just to do some thing that show results soon. First day the maximum dumble i could pick up was 5 kg. But two month later, 10 kg was easy peasy.
3- if you are religious, seek help from your god. This do great for mental support.
4- books. Wayne Dyer books are real deals.
I recommend Glasser’s choice theory. Nice book. Very nice.
5- volunteer jobs, helping out others is good feeling.
And for work, learn a professin, anything barbering, bakery, reparing hardware etc. If you become good enough, no body care about your collage degree and if you becane great in it, they will pay extra for you.
I say again. This depression shit is killing will power but you can stop it.
We belive in you.
I’ll pray for you
As someone who also has depression I just try to take it one day at a time. Doing something for myself every day kinda helps and i use journals to keep my thoughts down. I believe in you
Hey man I have started my life over several different times with nothing but the cloths on my back you are fine im 26 now and have my first kid on the way
I think you should look into driving a semi truck let me start off with its not great money but the things you are having issues with I think it would be an ideal job start out over the road see how you like being alone if you cant Handel that do it for a year get on a local route you can be home more offten or double down with a team driver
Get outside a bit dude. Eat better. Get good sleep. Not so much screen time. The works.
I would say job wise you can shoot for vocational or military at this point. You would have to commit to it pretty hard either way tho.
Dude I’m 36 and the biggest loser I know. You have so much time to grow and become the person you want to be. Anxiety and depression suck I know. Feeling lost and feeling your falling behind is very normal. I have had 10 jobs in the last 15 years, so trust me it’s not abnormal. I’ve only just started to feel like my true self.
You’ve got it buddy – even when you don’t think you have it – even if it takes time – it’ll be worth it
In a way, I kinda know how ya feel, finding your self worth, your own confidence is a struggle, especially when dealing with depression and other issues.
I just keep myself busy with things I enjoy while not working, music, games, whatever keeps my mind occupied.
Communication with people is difficult, but I’ve managed to make a few friends I’m comfortable enough with to hang around, just have to find those who encourage you in the right way.
My lot, we don’t hang out all the time, but we do consistently get together on Wednesdays.
Comparison is the thief of joy. Get off of social media and don’t worry about anyone else. You live with your parents ? You have the opportunity some dont get. Take advantage. Find a hobby or something you really enjoy ? Get into sales if you’re a like able person and give it everything you got. You can change your life trajectory in 6 months. My older sister was in this position at 34. She came and lived with me for 6 months. Ended up joining the airforce and became an officer. She now has fixed her credit and purchased her first home at 35. Has found passion in what she’s doing and it seems her success has just slingshoted. Everything will fall into place. The sooner you pick yourself up and dont accept no for an answer the sooner things will change. Grab the bull of life by the horns and make it happen !
Hey dear,
I felt compelled to comment. Do not be hard on yourself you are still young -you have your whole life ahead of you. I understand how you feel, truly I do.
I pray for a purpose filled job for you by the end of this year. Keep your head up, this world can feel harsh sometimes but you are already victorious. You are not a loser.
I think you should write down all your skills and talents and apply for a job to pay the bills. Once you saved a little perhaps look into getting a coach to help you with getting your dream job, or an apprenticeship work programme to build up your experience.
Take one day at a time. God bless you.
Hugs from London🙏
Hit the gym, sleep more, eat well
I was 23 as-well and felt like a loser, seeing so many people make money and have good jobs. I read so many self help books and they’re all honestly a copy and paste of the same things. However, I listened to an old Jordan Peterson lecture and he said something along the lines of, “if you do not choose to do something in life, then life will choose it for you. Pick something to do, you can’t just sit by doing nothing your whole life while time flies by, pick something”. That stuck with me. Long story short, I’ve been in a great job almost a year now after the applying and I am past feeling lost, confused and like a loser. Once you do something, more doors open for you. Just don’t throw your hands up and give up on yourself and; DO SOMETHING, EVEN IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO!
I was 23 as-well and felt like a loser, seeing so many people make money and have good jobs. I read so many self help books and they’re all honestly a copy and paste of the same things. However, I listened to an old Jordan Peterson lecture and he said something along the lines of, “if you do not choose to do something in life, then life will choose it for you. Pick something to do, you can’t just sit by doing nothing your whole life while time flies by, pick something”. That stuck with me. Long story short, I’ve been in a great job almost a year now after the applying and I am past feeling lost, confused and like a loser. Once you do something, more doors open for you. Just don’t throw your hands up and give up on yourself and; DO SOMETHING, EVEN IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHAT TO DO!