So we’ve been in a relationship for a little over a year now, and I (21M) recently found out by accident through the “discover people” on insta that they’ve refollowed their ex’s two accounts. They told me in the beginning of our relationship that they’ve been no contact ever since their breakup and unfollowed each other on social media. Ever since finding out, it’s been bothering me, not because they’re following him but rather due to the fact there was no need to do so to begin with and how it wasn’t just a single account. It would make me feel uncomfortable if they’ve began to get in contact again. I feel conflicted on whether I should bring this up because it feels like I’m overreacting/overthinking this whole thing, and I don’t want to seem insecure in what could just be nothing. I want to know their thoughts and their feelings before anything about what compelled them to do so, if I make sense. I’m not sure whether it would be a good idea to bring it up, or to just let it be ?
TLDR: partner refollowed their ex’s two account and I’m bothered by it. I’m not sure whether how to approach this or if I should.
Comments
>They told me in the beginning of our relationship that they’ve been no contact ever since their breakup and unfollowed each other on social media.
This is the main pivot of the problem. It was them that went out of their way to mention they were no contact with their ex. So the fact they no longer are is a big deal because they made it one.
So just be real: ‘I want to talk to you about your ex. Instagram listed them in discover people because you are following them and I remember you making it a point a year ago that you were not in contact with your ex. I wanted to get a sense of what has changed and why you felt the need to follow them after all this time.’
To me that is pretty reasonable. It does stand out as odd they’d do that now so it’s worth discussing before the anxiety you have about it has the opportunity to get worse.