you could appreciate the fact you don’t need to maintain any relationship and spend that time to invest yourself as getting good in a hobby or developing a new skill. At least that’s what I do. I may not have any friends but I am able to make really good dishes for myself to enjoy
Put away your phone, your computer games, Reddit, and spend time thinking and feeling.
If that’s not enough, if thinking about it brings anxiety and difficulty, if time with your own feelings isn’t enough, consider working with a therapist around building up your own identity. Figuring out who you are and what you want out of life are an important part of identity formation. The struggle to figure it out is a typical part of being a young adult.
Finding direction in life feels like walking through a dense fog when you’re feeling utterly alone. Start by grabbing some old magazines, scissors and a big ol’ piece of cardboard. Cut out pics that make your heart race with excitement, words that resonate deep inside, this is gonna be YOUR vision for the life you wanna lead. Stick ’em all up there and stare at it every day, because the more you focus on what you truly desire, the clearer a path will start to emerge
Find your ikigai, it is the intersection of what you are good at, what you can be paid for, what you love to do and what the world needs. Find your passion and you will find people to share it with. Good luck.
I’d stay off the internet because I think when you are given so many different ways of thinking you will start to over think every different way on looking at things
Set habits and pretend to be the person you want to be. The habits will be maybe boring but make sure they’re progressing you in some way mentally or physically don’t go out acting like some cocky know it all just do some soul searching within yourself it will be boring or hard or uninteresting at first but you’ll rewire your rain and those habits will become you and your character and will no longer be uninteresting your brain truly is an amazing
Thing that can be shifted and morphed to your liking but like any muscle you have to be repetitive with the behaviors. It’s not a joke nor just something positive I’m saying it is piece factual science fake it till you make it look at yourself in the mirror and say aloud about how you’re going to do better for yourself you deserve to be strong and healthy and happy observe the thoughts that enter into your mind and if they are negative instead of focusing on that negative thought try to think why did your brain think of such a thing and just grow from there
If you don’t know what road to take, take any, but keep walking, eventually you will find it, just keep walking , and keep looking. If don’t like something , try a new thing, if it feels good, you are walking in a right direction
Volunteering and helping with community events helps. I used to volunteer a lot at a local community theater – it was so much fun and you meet a lot of different people from different walks of life.
You do something, anything. Do not lose momentum. Try new things and give them a chance; knowing more clearly what you do not want to do is still progress in finding what you are looking for.
Keep an open mind and try new things. You’ll find it… but it’s easier to steer than it is to start moving from a complete stop. Keep moving.
There’s a system. Do some major fucking up. Develop a multi year opiate addiction, rack up some medical debt, burn a bunch of bridges and wreck a car somebody foolishly let’s you borrow. Once you get a feel for things you can start freestyling but the trick is coming as close as you can to being written off as a lost cause, really stick your dick in the proverbial mashed potatoes and maybe even have a literal piss in somebody’s bowl of Cheerios.
Anyway, when you’re on the razors edge of social annulment pull a hail Mary and start gathering your shit into a pile. Not too fast! Just stop shitting the bed for a min and maybe dig upwards a tiny bit. Check into a rehab, switch from Newports to a vape and just settle in for about 6 months.
After a while people will realize you haven’t brought any unexpected bullshit into their lives for much longer than usual and think “maybe they’re not as full of shit as they sound”.
Start doing all that normal Jack off shit that squares do after you’ve stopped having dreams about getting high every night. Not doing it well, it’s gotta look like your really putting in an effort outside your comfort zone but your trying. Like, when Christmas comes get a sad little tree and some mismatched decorations at Goodwill for a few bucks. While you’re there grab a set of matching plates and a few framed pictures to put up at your place; act dismissive of it when anyone notices them, but let them catch you smiling at it. Go to Aunt Bea’s cookout for 10 minutes of BS, eat all the good food and bail unannounced. They’ll laugh and gossip about your eat&run, but they’ll remember you showed up. Call your dad out of the blue and see if he wants to get lunch. He’ll be waiting for the bad news or the favor request and when it never comes, he’ll act like you just got your masters and will definitely pick up the check. You don’t have to enjoy any of it, try just enough to see you’re putting in an effort to the shit you think normal people do.
Proceed like this in a gradual fashion with a few minor setbacks. Own the setback and say you’ll do better, just don’t make that same fuck up for a good while. If you pace it out, you can spend a decade working your way up to “functional member of society” while being celebrated way more than all your siblings and cousins who are accomplishing genuinely impressive things.🤠
Force yourself to get out there, try new things, meet new people. Join a gym, or a bowling league, or a meetup group or two. Find out what other people your age are doing w their lives. And keep a journal of what you learned abt yourself each day. Make entries like: I hung out w a new friend and he suggested I take a class at the local college; or, I met a girl in meetup group today, and it felt good that she gave me some attention. Stuff like that. It will improve your self esteem and help you figure out what your next step in life should be.
Invest in yourself. Take workout classes (CrossFit), take night classes. Friends are great to have but as you get older the harder it is to maintain them.
Older we get the harder it is to find friends. I recommend finding a hobby/organization that you really enjoy and then find friends by joining a local community around the hobby.
Thats when I joined the Navy. It was the best move I ever made. I retired in ’05 and not only did I see the world I made lifetime friends and I’m now financially set for life.
Everyone is different but that worked out great for me and even if you dont stay in, its a great place to start. You get a free college education and free healthcare for life.
There are a lot of good answers here, but as a 29 year old who took good amount of time to get where I am now (and still feel behind!):
When you don’t know your direction in life, focus on your health and wellness. Work on YOU, focus on YOU, and allow the rest to fall into place. Find things you enjoy doing by trying a bunch of different hobbies and do the ones you like the most. Even if you’re bad at it.
Time and willingness to try things. I didn’t start getting my shit together until I was 25, it took 4 more years to find a viable career path, and I didn’t really get where I wanted to be until my 40s.
For a lot of us, the answer really is time and trying. I envy people in their 20s who have a clear goal and plan, because I had no fucking clue. A friend urged me to try a new job field, and that changed my life!
Comments
You won’t find it here, I can tell ya that…
you could appreciate the fact you don’t need to maintain any relationship and spend that time to invest yourself as getting good in a hobby or developing a new skill. At least that’s what I do. I may not have any friends but I am able to make really good dishes for myself to enjoy
Soul searching, meaning time with your thoughts.
Put away your phone, your computer games, Reddit, and spend time thinking and feeling.
If that’s not enough, if thinking about it brings anxiety and difficulty, if time with your own feelings isn’t enough, consider working with a therapist around building up your own identity. Figuring out who you are and what you want out of life are an important part of identity formation. The struggle to figure it out is a typical part of being a young adult.
Finding direction in life feels like walking through a dense fog when you’re feeling utterly alone. Start by grabbing some old magazines, scissors and a big ol’ piece of cardboard. Cut out pics that make your heart race with excitement, words that resonate deep inside, this is gonna be YOUR vision for the life you wanna lead. Stick ’em all up there and stare at it every day, because the more you focus on what you truly desire, the clearer a path will start to emerge
Find your ikigai, it is the intersection of what you are good at, what you can be paid for, what you love to do and what the world needs. Find your passion and you will find people to share it with. Good luck.
I’d stay off the internet because I think when you are given so many different ways of thinking you will start to over think every different way on looking at things
I figured out what I want in life by trying and experiencing different things. Talking to people can help too.
Sometimes, to figure out what you like. You have to do a bunch of things you don’t like.
Set habits and pretend to be the person you want to be. The habits will be maybe boring but make sure they’re progressing you in some way mentally or physically don’t go out acting like some cocky know it all just do some soul searching within yourself it will be boring or hard or uninteresting at first but you’ll rewire your rain and those habits will become you and your character and will no longer be uninteresting your brain truly is an amazing
Thing that can be shifted and morphed to your liking but like any muscle you have to be repetitive with the behaviors. It’s not a joke nor just something positive I’m saying it is piece factual science fake it till you make it look at yourself in the mirror and say aloud about how you’re going to do better for yourself you deserve to be strong and healthy and happy observe the thoughts that enter into your mind and if they are negative instead of focusing on that negative thought try to think why did your brain think of such a thing and just grow from there
If you don’t know what road to take, take any, but keep walking, eventually you will find it, just keep walking , and keep looking. If don’t like something , try a new thing, if it feels good, you are walking in a right direction
Your 20s are the worst!
Volunteering and helping with community events helps. I used to volunteer a lot at a local community theater – it was so much fun and you meet a lot of different people from different walks of life.
You do something, anything. Do not lose momentum. Try new things and give them a chance; knowing more clearly what you do not want to do is still progress in finding what you are looking for.
Keep an open mind and try new things. You’ll find it… but it’s easier to steer than it is to start moving from a complete stop. Keep moving.
Psychedelics
But you gotta be careful with them. Have fun but be careful. And incorporate what they teach you into daily practice
try Warren Buffets 5/25 list
I actually find mind mapping goals and realistic future occurrences helps
If you can travel to another country it can help
I’m 48 and still don’t know what I want to be when I grow up.
There’s a system. Do some major fucking up. Develop a multi year opiate addiction, rack up some medical debt, burn a bunch of bridges and wreck a car somebody foolishly let’s you borrow. Once you get a feel for things you can start freestyling but the trick is coming as close as you can to being written off as a lost cause, really stick your dick in the proverbial mashed potatoes and maybe even have a literal piss in somebody’s bowl of Cheerios.
Anyway, when you’re on the razors edge of social annulment pull a hail Mary and start gathering your shit into a pile. Not too fast! Just stop shitting the bed for a min and maybe dig upwards a tiny bit. Check into a rehab, switch from Newports to a vape and just settle in for about 6 months.
After a while people will realize you haven’t brought any unexpected bullshit into their lives for much longer than usual and think “maybe they’re not as full of shit as they sound”.
Start doing all that normal Jack off shit that squares do after you’ve stopped having dreams about getting high every night. Not doing it well, it’s gotta look like your really putting in an effort outside your comfort zone but your trying. Like, when Christmas comes get a sad little tree and some mismatched decorations at Goodwill for a few bucks. While you’re there grab a set of matching plates and a few framed pictures to put up at your place; act dismissive of it when anyone notices them, but let them catch you smiling at it. Go to Aunt Bea’s cookout for 10 minutes of BS, eat all the good food and bail unannounced. They’ll laugh and gossip about your eat&run, but they’ll remember you showed up. Call your dad out of the blue and see if he wants to get lunch. He’ll be waiting for the bad news or the favor request and when it never comes, he’ll act like you just got your masters and will definitely pick up the check. You don’t have to enjoy any of it, try just enough to see you’re putting in an effort to the shit you think normal people do.
Proceed like this in a gradual fashion with a few minor setbacks. Own the setback and say you’ll do better, just don’t make that same fuck up for a good while. If you pace it out, you can spend a decade working your way up to “functional member of society” while being celebrated way more than all your siblings and cousins who are accomplishing genuinely impressive things.🤠
Force yourself to get out there, try new things, meet new people. Join a gym, or a bowling league, or a meetup group or two. Find out what other people your age are doing w their lives. And keep a journal of what you learned abt yourself each day. Make entries like: I hung out w a new friend and he suggested I take a class at the local college; or, I met a girl in meetup group today, and it felt good that she gave me some attention. Stuff like that. It will improve your self esteem and help you figure out what your next step in life should be.
Invest in yourself. Take workout classes (CrossFit), take night classes. Friends are great to have but as you get older the harder it is to maintain them.
“Life is what happens when your busy making other plans”
Don’t stress about your life everything will happen in due time!
Older we get the harder it is to find friends. I recommend finding a hobby/organization that you really enjoy and then find friends by joining a local community around the hobby.
Thats when I joined the Navy. It was the best move I ever made. I retired in ’05 and not only did I see the world I made lifetime friends and I’m now financially set for life.
Everyone is different but that worked out great for me and even if you dont stay in, its a great place to start. You get a free college education and free healthcare for life.
There are a lot of good answers here, but as a 29 year old who took good amount of time to get where I am now (and still feel behind!):
When you don’t know your direction in life, focus on your health and wellness. Work on YOU, focus on YOU, and allow the rest to fall into place. Find things you enjoy doing by trying a bunch of different hobbies and do the ones you like the most. Even if you’re bad at it.
Time and willingness to try things. I didn’t start getting my shit together until I was 25, it took 4 more years to find a viable career path, and I didn’t really get where I wanted to be until my 40s.
For a lot of us, the answer really is time and trying. I envy people in their 20s who have a clear goal and plan, because I had no fucking clue. A friend urged me to try a new job field, and that changed my life!
Take it day by day.
None of us have the answer you are looking for. You’re 24, you have the rest of your life to figure it out. Just live