WIBTAH if I asked a girl on my team not to be partners?

r/

I’m a 17 year old girl and I play on my schools JV soccer team. This year, a girl joined the team. Our school is super small and so are the soccer teams, so even though she’s never played soccer before she got on the team. She’s super nice and I’m glad I’m getting to know her, but she is very bad at soccer and not a very fast runner. Since we’ve talked a bit, every time we need partners for a drill, she asks to be my partner. This leads to drills that should be quick paced being very slow as she takes a long time to return the ball or just me chasing the ball half the time because she kicks it in the wrong direction. I would be fine being partners with her sometimes, but since it’s literally every single time I’m not getting a lot out of the drills. Also every time there’s some sort of competition with partners, we always lose. I’ve put up with it for about three weeks, but I don’t know if I can put up with it anymore. It’s getting to the point I’m starting to resent her for not being able to actually do drills correctly, and I don’t want to not like someone just because she can’t play soccer. WIBTAH if I told her I don’t want to be partners anymore because she’s not very good at soccer? I wouldn’t say it like that, but I don’t know if I should just put up with it since we don’t do only partner stuff or not, especially because she’s nice and I don’t want her to think I don’t like her.

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    I’m a 17 year old girl and I play on my schools JV soccer team. This year, a girl joined the team. Our school is super small and so are the soccer teams, so even though she’s never played soccer before she got on the team. She’s super nice and I’m glad I’m getting to know her, but she is very bad at soccer and not a very fast runner. Since we’ve talked a bit, every time we need partners for a drill, she asks to be my partner. This leads to drills that should be quick paced being very slow as she takes a long time to return the ball or just me chasing the ball half the time because she kicks it in the wrong direction. I would be fine being partners with her sometimes, but since it’s literally every single time I’m not getting a lot out of the drills. Also every time there’s some sort of competition with partners, we always lose. I’ve put up with it for about three weeks, but I don’t know if I can put up with it anymore. It’s getting to the point I’m starting to resent her for not being able to actually do drills correctly, and I don’t want to not like someone just because she can’t play soccer. WIBTAH if I told her I don’t want to be partners anymore because she’s not very good at soccer? I wouldn’t say it like that, but I don’t know if I should just put up with it since we don’t do only partner stuff or not, especially because she’s nice and I don’t want her to think I don’t like her.

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  3. sublime_369 Avatar

    NTA if you handle it gently.

    What you suggest seems fair – everyone on the team takes turns mentoring the newbie.. which is effectively what you’ve been doing.

    You shouldn’t have to be so tied to her that you can’t train and improve your game.

    Might be worth having a quiet word with the coach in the first instance. It would be better for them to direct that the pairings rotate.

  4. HodorTargaryen Avatar

    YWBTA. The point is learning teamwork and adapting to different skill levels, which you’ll be doing every day when you enter the workforce. Treat this as a chance to build communication and patience, those skills will take you much farther than shaving a few seconds off a drill.

  5. UpstairsWait483 Avatar

    “Hi friend!

    Glad I caught you before practice.

    I need to drill a lot harder to improve my skills.

    Let’s mix up the partners from now on so we can experience different levels of skill and advance our own personal skills.

    Awesome!

    See you at practice!”

    And keep on moving.

    She’ll be salty for a week and then, she’ll get over it.

    NTA

  6. Competitive_Test6697 Avatar

    Speak with your coach about changing teams.

    But also, try be a good team mate and help her get better. Start at the basics with her.

    But dont hurt her feelings and confidence. Youll feel better for it

  7. Cryptids_express Avatar

    Hello (28 F) I played sports in high school and I feel like I have been in both roles. She is probably shy and knows that she is not the greatest at soccer but she’s found a safe space as being your partner. This could be a really good opportunity for you to teach her the right skills to perform the drills. Then either she’ll find confidence to go practice with more people or you just make a good friend from the situation. I had a few chances to teach my friends things that they could not take away from coaches or teachers. However, you are not responsible to be her and you do not have to keep partnering with her. You could let her know a specific day you would like to practice with another friend. Talking to coach may let coach know they should probably work with her more but it could go either way involving coach.

    In short, you have a really good chance to help a peer get better at their performance which will be rewarding in its own way but you would absolutely not the be asshole if you respectfully decline.

  8. Ok-disaster2022 Avatar

    NTA but I would ask the coach to assign rotating partners for drills, and maybe ask the coach to give her extra practice since she’s new to the game. 

  9. Becalmandkind Avatar

    NTA. This is not your problem, this is your coach’s problem. Coach should be rotating all the practice roles to make sure you can adapt to all playing styles. If they’re not doing that, express your concern to your coach privately. YWNBTA for doing that.

  10. jackalopeswild Avatar

    I hope you don’t take this the wrong way but you’re 17 and JV. To me that says you’re not in line for a scholarship, or even to walk on a college team. If I’m wrong, ignore this, but if I’m right, maybe view the friendship making opportunity as more valuable than the sport?