So I (20F) have a brain condition that gives me bad migranes weekly. And these migranes can sometimes last 2 or 3 days. During my worst ones, I end up not being able to look at screens so that means no videos, no TV or games.
That’s where I turned to books, I have a pretty expansive library (grew up reading) and I have some juvenile series(Warrior cats, wings of fire, city of bones, Etc) that I save for my worst days because obviously, kids books means simpler plot and my head already hurts so I want easy entertainment. I have plenty of adult series and books too.
I had one of my friend’s over since she wanted to borrow a book. She went into my library for the book and asked about the kids books, assuming they was for my niece for when she got older(she’s 4) and I said no, they are for me. And she got weirdly quiet. A few minutes later, she said she forgot that she had to go to the store and said her goodbyes.
Like 30 minutes ago, I got a text from her saying that it was kinda concerning that me, an adult, has kids books like that and actually reads them. I asked why and she said that “It could be me trying to connect to kids” which is wild and makes me sound like a pedođź’€. But idk, is it really that weird??
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So I (20F) have a brain condition that gives me bad migranes weekly. And these migranes can sometimes last 2 or 3 days. During my worst ones, I end up not being able to look at screens so that means no videos, no TV or games.
That’s where I turned to books, I have a pretty expansive library (grew up reading) and I have some juvenile series(Warrior cats, wings of fire, city of bones, Etc) that I save for my worst days because obviously, kids books means simpler plot and my head already hurts so I want easy entertainment. I have plenty of adult series and books too.
I had one of my friend’s over since she wanted to borrow a book. She went into my library for the book and asked about the kids books, assuming they was for my niece for when she got older(she’s 4) and I said no, they are for me. And she got weirdly quiet. A few minutes later, she said she forgot that she had to go to the store and said her goodbyes.
Like 30 minutes ago, I got a text from her saying that it was kinda concerning that me, an adult, has kids books like that and actually reads them. I asked why and she said that “It could be me trying to connect to kids” which is wild. But idk, is it really that weird??
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> Idk if I’m the asshole but is it weird to own kids books like that? Like the plots are ok, I use it mainly for entertainment since pretty much anything else hurts my head.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA
You’re a grown adult and can read whatever you want.
It’s a weird thing to get bent out of shape about.
NTA, not weird at all. Sometimes I’m more in the mood for a light read, and I still have my Redwall and A Series of Unfortunate Events books for that, among others. I’m already in my 30s.
I feel your pain re: migraines, too. Sometimes even the white of paper can blind me in my worst attacks.
NTA. My go to answer in those situations: “Weird projection but ok”.
She didn’t ask why you enjoyed it. She said it would be weird if you enjoyed it for her first assumption. That’s not on you.
people read for comfort, especially during tough times. Your friend’s reaction says more about her than about you.
NTA I have a few books from I loved reading growing up and reread the from time to time. To me, it’s comfort reading. And as a fellow migraine sufferer, more power to you, nothing weird about nostalgia.
NTA
It’s not weird to read books targeted towards kids… IT IS weird to accuse someone of trying to “connect with kids” cuz they read books… people often watch children shows for simpler entertainment as well since these shows are more predictable and lighthearted. These are definitely not signs of “trying to connect with kids” it’s just people wanting lighthearted, easy-to-consume media.
Your “friend” is creepy if that is her first thought. Also, it doesn’t matter if you have a brain condition for you to have whatever books you want. I’m a grown woman and I have “Love You Forever” and “The Little Mermaid” on my shelf.
Freaking love warrior cats and mortal instuments. You do you, read stuff that you want to read, for literally whatever reason. When a friend was over and saw al my (woman in mid twenties) YA books in the bookcase, he told me ” you are an adult, I’m going to buy you some real literature, you should read adult books”. And I never did. I enjoy YA, so I read YA. You don’t need to explain in any scenario.
NTA OP, you’re an adult and you’re allowed to read whatever you want.
Your friend really has some issues to even suggest that you’re “trying to connect to kids”.
NTA my partner and I collect kids books that we loved growing up but never owned, partially for our potential kids and nieces/nephews one day, but also for our own benefit. They’re a much quicker read and can provide a nice break from reality. I also think that some juvenile fiction is more creative and thought-provoking than some adult fiction. BUT, like you, we also have an extensive collection of other books, too, but what kind of friend would imply something sinister over you owning books??
I’m 40 years old and have a colouring book and pens.. maybe I’m weird too..
Your friend is the weird one.
NTA your friend is the weird one to directly went to that train of thought….Â
Uh, no. That’s not weird. I have kids books tlo, some of them were my mothers when she was little. I’ve never thought twice about it.
Nta
NTA. I have books from my childhood too (that being A Little Princess and Little Woman) and books from series I liked as a kid, but didn’t get a chance to read/ buy those books from the Scholastic Book Fair (The Dear Canada series in particular). Heck, I almost bought a copy of Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark the other day, yet another classic from my childhood. And if I ever see The Secret Garden and have the money, I’ll buy that too.
Your friend is the only strange one here.
You shouldn’t have just said “why”. You should’ve explained your condition. I get migraines too, I would explain it to them if they asked – the 1st time
NTA. Your “friend” is being a weirdo. Books are books. Who cares. Those are some fun books.
NTA
Have just ordered Warrior Cats from the library on the basis of a Tumblr recommendation. And if you were “trying to connect with kids” – why would that be a bad thing? Why would your friend’s mind go straight to sex vs connecting with kids because they are (or at least some of them are) interesting small humans.
Clear NTA. Your friend needs to calm down on the “everyone is a kiddy-fiddler!” mentality. I have several kids books for nostalgia and collector reasons, as they were massive influences on my own childhood and I like having them as reminders of that even if it has been decades since I read them. One of the series that I collect is normally found in the kid’s section of the charity shops (because it is gaming-related and thus no adult would admit to being a gamer?! I guess?).
I have some sentimental and artsy picture books around despite being far from the age when reading them posed an effort. Now I more fully appreciate the art. NTA.
WTF? NTA, there are plenty of people (myself included) who enjoy children’s media. Not everyone wants to constantly consume media that’s either complex and deep, grimdark and gorey, and/or sexual/romantic. Whenever I want to put something on to enjoy the sounds and aesthetics of some sort of media I’ll put on Winnie the Pooh or some old Disney movie. It’s actually concerning that’s immediately what she jumped to. I’m not saying she is herself a sexual predator, but maybe she has someone else in her life she’s more concerned about whose shown more serious behaviors, or she herself had a bad experience either as a child or an adult. I don’t think this has anything to do with you and you can sleep soundly (migraines not included) knowing it’s perfectly fine to have children’s books on your shelf.
Damn she might have called police on me if she saw my manga collection the friend is creepy I’d cut contact if they think like this about you after knowing you for so long they really aren’t friendÂ
I have a couple of young children’s books that I think art is beautiful and story is pure and heartwarming. Makes me appreciate simple things.
I’d be seriously shocked if someone thinks I have inappropriate interests in toddlers because of these books.
No, your friend is kinda weird for thinking that.
Your friend is the sick one if that’s the first thing that came into her mind. NTA, ages on books is about when you can begin to read them, not about when you have to stop to
NTA, but your friend is.Â
NTA.
I am in my sixties and have had a lifelong fondness for children’s books.
I was well into adulthood when I discovered I’m far from alone. There are many, many people like you and me.
I even joined an online book group where we discussed children’s books, and traded them. Our group members included at least four university professors whose field of expertise is children’s literature. I dropped out of that group after a few years when it was taking up too much of my leisure time, but for all I know the group may be still going. And there are probably many other such groups.
One of the particular pleasures of still enjoying children’s books as an adult is that you get to read books that didn’t exist when you were a child.
In addition to simply liking these books, they have therapeutic value for me too. I’ve lived with anxiety since early childhood, and one of the strategies I have for calming myself is to read the same books that comforted me as a child.
Your friend is the weird one, not you.
Enjoy your books, and get better friends.
UPDATED TO ADD:
If you STILL have any lingering doubts, OP, despite the many NTA verdicts from commenters here, I encourage you to seek out an online book group such as the one I described above.
Even if you only join it briefly, I think you’ll be greatly reassured to discover: (a) there’s lots of us, (b) we’re perfectly normal people, and (c) there’s nothing remotely creepy in the discussions about our favorite books.
Just knowing that you’re not alone, that there are thousands of people like you and me, may give you the confidence to display the contents of your bookshelf proudly and to push back against ignorant remarks like the one your friend made.
NTA
I have literal picture books on my shelves. That I bought for me.
Your friend needs to grow up.
NTA
”When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty, I read them openly. When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up.”
C. S. Lewis
NTA I’m 41 and have kids books on my shelves, they are nice easy reads when I am not in the mood for a complicated made for adults storyline and some I read in my teens and still enjoy a reread.
Young adult and children’s literature are perfectly acceptable genres for adults to read. (I’m teaching a university course that considers immigration through young adult and children’s lit.) You are NTA, but your friend is. Your friend is also super weird.
No. I have my childhood favorites on my bookshelf and read them to my grandkids.
NTA. There are a million reasons for having those books, and just liking to read those books sometimes is as valid of a reason than anything. Children’s literature is literature, and people can enjoy reading whatever they’d like.
NTA. This isn’t an asshole thing at all from your end, but it’s weird for people to crap on someone’s bookshelf.
I’m 41, and I still read the Anne of Green Gables series and the Little Women series fairly regularly, even though I know them cold. They’re comfort reading. I also have quite a few books I reread on a fairly regular basis just because the people and society in them are good to be around.
Comfort books, comfort shows, whatever, enjoy them and let them help distract you from pain.
NTA, some people collect their favorite series from when they were kids, some people genuinely enjoy a less convoluted/violent story that is often found in media meant for kids, and some people might see it as a way to connect to their inner child. Why is that her first thought? Also, if you are hanging out with younger kids like your niece, what would be wrong with keeping up with a few of their interest?!?!! Sounds like you weren’t being creepy, and it also sounds like a stretch to think someone reading a kids’ book is being a creep. Personally, I’d probably distance myself from someone who thinks like that. They might have something they need to work through, and it seems like they may have taken it out on you, NTA.
Your friend is being a creepy weirdo. I keep a handful of children’s books myself because I enjoy them. Your friend would leave my house crying if they tried to talk shit about collection especially while trying to borrow a book.
Have you read The Little Prince by Antoine de Saint-Exupéry? Its devastatingly beautiful.
Read what you want.
(Edited because I accidentally post early)
NTA, not even close.
FWIW, my son is 27, and he still has so many of his childhood favorites. The Warriors (such a great series, I read them along with him), Rangers Apprentice series, Gallagher Girls (which I also loved), and a few others.
It’s totally normal. Hope your migraines get better.
nta
tell her it’s relaxing during migranes and she’s offensiveÂ
I am 45 and would still read those books. Your friend is weird AF.
NTA
As the others have said, read whatever you want.
If you’d like to get an excuse, tell that you’ve planned to write a children’s fantasy book of your own. In order to do that, you’ve done research on what’s already on the market.
NTA
Plenty of adults read children’s or young adult books either for comfort, nostalgia, or just because they enjoy them. You also have a medical reason for choosing easier reads during migraines which makes your choice even more understandable. Your friend’s reaction was unfair and based on an inaccurate and harmful assumption. Having and enjoying juvenile fiction does not mean anything inappropriate about your character.
The ethical issue here is not about what you read but about your friend jumping to an extreme conclusion without cause. It is normal and healthy to enjoy different genres including ones targeted at younger readers. Many well respected adults openly read and discuss series like Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, or Wings of Fire.
You are not wrong for keeping and reading those books. If your friend cannot separate her assumptions from reality you may want to distance yourself or clarify firmly that her comment was out of line. What matters is that you find comfort and relief in them during difficult times and that is completely valid.
NTA your friend needs to touch grass as they say. Shes fallen into the “everything is a danger” paranoia community who take the good advice of being cautious to such extremes that they see threats everywhere.
NTA I LOVE my pop up books and have tons of other kids books too and no kids. Your friend’s attitude is the weird creepy thing in this situation.
NTA. I listen to YA (young adult) fiction series audiobooks when I’m trying to fall asleep because they’re interesting stories and there’s a minimum of sex and violence.
NTA
NTA. I’m 42 and I love YA fiction. It’s honestly better written than most adult fiction, much of which relies heavily on murder and/or sex. I also have an entire shelf of picture books. Why shouldn’t I enjoy a Caldecott winner every now and then?
NTA I’m pushing 29 and pretty much 99% of my book shelves/drawers/boxes/whatever are kids books. There are some genuinely brilliant authors out there who just…make really good stories, regardless of target audience. A good book is a good book. Enjoy them and tell anyone who doesn’t like it to screw off. They’ve probably never even read a good adult fiction novel anyway that isn’t romance or thriller.
NTA and I’d be more concerned about the friend seeing as that’s where there mind went.
NTA, at my age, my grandma was already a grandma and I find the deepest connection with the “The very hungry Caterpillar” book. I have it digital, but point stands. Also kids books are wonderfully illustrated and they’re great for people who want to learn a new language.
NTA. Having kids books on your shelf is perfectly normal.
Her immediately jumping to that particular conclusion? Not normal. I certainly now have my doubts about someone’s mentality in this situation and it’s not you.
NTA
Nearly 50. Still have my Trixie Belden books, famous five, adventure stories for boys/girls and more.
My husband and I both enjoy the Rangers Apprentice/Brotherband series. They’re the books that got my husband into reading.
Books are books.
NTA. My understanding is that middle aged ladies make up a huge percentage of YA readers. Comfort reading of old favorites when you feel like crap is also incredibly common. Your friend is being absurd.
NTA your friend is a huge weirdo and a little creepy if that’s where her mind went
NTA
Your friend is the weirdo for jumping to that conclusion. Also they could have asked while still there with you instead of a text message.
NTA and your friend isn’t really that good of a friend.
NTA… your friend is an AH, my sister has a collection of kids books (she works with kids with special needs) and got me educated about them… there’s a whole world in kids literature, on base level they are easy and have beautiful illustrations but there so much study and pedagogy in them (I even learnt that there are books specially studied for babies a few months old!); it is a interesting world and they are very enjoyable.
What a loser. While YA and teen books are predominately “for” teens and young adults, anyone can read them. I read heaps of YA and really enjoy a lot of it. (I am 40)
NTA WTF I’m in my 40s and still read kids books. Books are for everyone and if that’s the genre you enjoy who cares. Go look at warrior cats fandoms and most are adults not children
NTA. I am 50 and still enjoy kids books, if I’m tired or stressed, then a simpler book is easier to absorb, and they’re often funnier than adult books. I’ve just found and ordered one of my favourites from childhood.
NTA. I reread some old favorites from my childhood from time to time myself. It’s like comfort food, but literature.
Your friend either needs to touch grass, because she’s seeing threats everywhere, or she’s projecting. Given her immediate reaction, I’d be concerned about being her friend. She will try to ruin your life to prove that she’s right, and not care about the consequences.
No you’re not TAH
Your friend is being weird about this. I have several books/ book series from my childhood that I treasure and display on my shelves. Books don’t become inaccessible once you age out of the target demographic. “When you read a book as a child, it becomes a part of your identity in a way that no other reading in your whole life does,” is a fantastic quote from the movie “You’ve Got Mail” that is so true.
Nta and your friend has serious problems. I would set them straight and be very clear that a) they should probably get therapy for whatever tf happened to them to make them immediately think that is the reason you have those books and not one of hundreds of other possible explanations (including the fact that only 3 years ago you were not an adult yourself) and b) not to bother coming back as why would you ever want to talk to someone again who would think you capable of that?
NTA. Who doesn’t keep books they loved and still love? Your friend is tilting at windmills.
NTA it’s not weird at all, I have The Giving Tree and A Light in the Attic among others on my bookshelves. I love rereading books from when I was a kid, it’s soothing and you can look at things from a new angle. Migraines suck so much and I’m sorry you have to deal with them.
Side note, if you adopt a skittish kitten or cat, reading books like these out loud to them can help them adjust to your voice.
NTA read what you want
NTA
Gosh, if she saw my bookshelf she’d have a fit. I have picture books as well as young fiction and young adult fiction. As an artist, I absolutely adore picture books with fabulous illustrations.
I also have books such as Moby D*ck (apparently I can’t say that word here), Sylvia Plath, Wordsworth, Dickens, Shakespeare.
Get the books you love and anyone who has a problem with it can bugger off.
Nah I read all kinds of heavy, thinky grown-up books, and I also still read YA and middle grade sometimes (Zachary Ying sequel WHEN). Middle grade might be easier to read and aimed at a younger audience, but that doesn’t mean a middle grade work can’t be full of interesting ideas, compelling characters, and thought-provoking themes.
NTA, clearly your friend just has some deeper trust issues going on and should probably talk to somebody about that. The fact that that is her first assumption is WILD. Also the fact that she decided to uo and leave with no explanation… Did she even attempt to communicate her thoughts in that half an hour or did she just let it sit in the air?
NTA
OP, I’m 33 an I’ll be damned if someone is gonna tell me I’m too old for the Warriors series. It is STILL coming out with new books!! I’ve been with this series since like the 8th grade and I refuse to give it up.
My dad (70s) actually supports me reading those books cause he knows they make me happy.
Im in my 60’s and still read my Enid Blytons and Little house books. There’s nothing wrong with that, my reason is escapism when life gets a bit too much its nice to bury myself in something nicer and simpler. Oh, and my absolute favourite is Winnie the Pooh love the films too. Don’t think there’s something wrong with you because you have a very strange “friend”. Your so called friend has the problem not you. You enjoy being you and never apologise or feel bad about being yourself. Im sorry for you having the migraines, i suffered for many years with them as well. Have you had your vision tested? Maybe you need glasses? Just a thought but bad eyesight is known to cause headaches. Good luck with it and maybe rethink your friendship.
Ask her who does she think write most of kids books? Freaking adult authors. Your friend is dumb and you are NTA.
Did you explain to your friend why you have those books the way you did for us? Why don’t you do her a favor and send her a link to this post and say it is yours. It might go a long way to put this whole thing to bed. (Under the circumstances, that was probably a bad analogy.)
NTA. Her jumping to that really wild conclusion says more about her than you.Â
NTA. The books you read are none of her business.
I am 46 and I read the “Chronicles of Narnia” every year (have done so every year since I was ten). I also have most of my books from childhood and occasionally read them. I love rereading “Where the Sidewalk Ends”, “Anne of Green Gables”, “Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark”, and so many others. I am not always in the mood for books like “Crime and Punishment” or “The Canterbury Tales”.
OP, you are definitely NTA and your friend really needs to take a break from whatever she’s consuming giving her those kind of ideas.
i read a lot of Teen/young adult fantasy/Sc-fi.
i also have a ton of my books from my childhood. some for nostalgia, some in case friends kids come over.
your friend is weird.