I am a freshman in college with some of my friends. We know most colleges have an orientation program. Usually for most colleges is around 1 week or month and mine was literally the whole year (Although it only happens every Saturday).
I hate the orientation program they made for us. Only yelling, swearing, drills, and even sometimes humiliates my friends at the program. I felt enough which made me won’t join that program for almost everything.
One day, my friends messaged me saying some of the seniors are searching for me. I told them to just let it because I think it won’t escalate. Turns out I am wrong.
They told me that if I didn’t join the program, I am not only getting rejected by the organization my faculty made but also won’t letting the others to also get into the program. I am forced by my friends to do the assignments, but I replied “There is no academic sanctions, I don’t even want to join it. Why would I care?” My friends got absolutely pissed that they even forced me or even try to capture me so that they can “force” me into joining it even though that is not a requirement in my college nor department.
On short, my friends are now trying to force me to join the program they made even though I didn’t wanna join in the first place. I am quite confused if I am the asshole or they’re the ones in this situation
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I am a freshman in college with some of my friends. We know most colleges have an orientation program. Usually for most colleges is around 1 week or month and mine was literally the whole year (Although it only happens every Saturday).
I hate the orientation program they made for us. Only yelling, swearing, drills, and even sometimes humiliates my friends at the program. I felt enough which made me won’t join that program for almost everything.
One day, my friends messaged me saying some of the seniors are searching for me. I told them to just let it because I think it won’t escalate. Turns out I am wrong.
They told me that if I didn’t join the program, I am not only getting rejected by the organization my faculty made but also won’t letting the others to also get into the program. I am forced by my friends to do the assignments, but I replied “There is no academic sanctions, I don’t even want to join it. Why would I care?” My friends got absolutely pissed that they even forced me or even try to capture me so that they can “force” me into joining it even though that is not a requirement in my college nor department.
On short, my friends are now trying to force me to join the program they made even though I didn’t wanna join in the first place. I am quite confused if I am the asshole or they’re the ones in this situation
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> (1) Me not joining the Orientation program for weeks
(2) Because my friends kept blaming me because of it
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
What you’re describing isn’t “orientation,” it’s hazing. And hazing is toxic garbage. Good on you for not playing along.
nta- dude genuinely find new friends, its only the first few weeks of your freshman year you still have time to find better friends
NTA- First, find new friends. They can’t force you to do something even saying no. Them capturing you makes it worse.
Second, this isn’t orientation. It feels like hazing. Being yelled at for not doing things or doing them wrong feels so bad. Also, the fact the seniors were searching for you sounds scary. Hazing, depending on what they do, can be illegal, even. Good luck and be careful.
Talk to your adviser or another school official. As others have said, this sounds more like hazing than an official school orientation. Other students should not be allowed to yell at you or force you to do things you don’t want to do. Capturing you is literally kidnapping. Talk to someone in authority.
ETA: NTA
Sounds like being a pledge for some frat. While it has been a long time since my college days I don’t think they are a requirement today so just say no and stick to it. NTA