So I’m a 21 year old student and I work in a bar too, if i’m not drowning in assignments i’m drowning in work. My sister in law (27) has been with my brother (31) for about 5 years now. They moved to a new town about 3 years ago where my SIL met her now best friend (32F)
Don’t get me wrong my SIL and I have a great relationship, we joke around, cook together generally have fun and have good conversations but there’s this ongoing thing that just really pisses me off. Her bestfriend who is 11 years older than me keep in mind is into me, like REALLY into me.. Whatever feelings she has she’s clearly told my SIL about saying she just needs to have some fun after having her kid (7) and ‘not getting any’ since then.
I’ve met her and she’s got a good personality but I’m not into her looks wise,I can’t help myself I’m sorry. Regardless of that, my SIL decided to take matters into her own hands and has been barking at me for a year that I should just go sleep with her friend.. that I’ll enjoy it, it’ll make her friend happy and to just give it a go for one night. Honestly makes me uncomfortable. When I do say no she gets all butthurt saying i’m leading her friend on when i’m just nice to her.. as I am to everyone.
Last week, my SIL invited me over for dinner and look behold her best friend was there all dressed up at the table. We greeted each other as normal and sat down to eat and her best friend starts making conversation with me and starts flirting real hard.. like to the point it makes me kind of cringe. As we’re getting up to leave (I was forced to drive her home because that’s gentlemanly and how are you gonna let a woman go home on her own this late at night?) So cool whatever we get to her apartment, I stop the car and say “Alright bye, get in safe” and I kid you not this woman jumps at me starts kissing me and grabbing my little friend for no apparent reason. I push away and ask her what she’s doing and she says “I thought you were feeling me as much I was feeling you” I said “I don’t wanna hurt your feelings but I would never be more than a friend to you I’m sorry”
Next morning I get calls from my SIL telling me I’m a jerk and a manipulator, that I don’t respect women and that ‘clearly I have no empathy for a woman who is suffering’ to which I just said ‘Suffering from what? Getting no d***? That’s not my problem’ and hung up. I’ve been getting loads of texts which I’m ignoring but now even my brother is getting involved saying I just sleep with her for one night and then leave it all alone. I told him no too.
All 3 of them are kind of coming at me calling me a jerk because I’m young and single and don’t have any commitments etc and I should at least give her a chance. I’m starting to feel bad because it messes up the vibe we’ve got with my brother and SIL but I won’t force myself to sleep with a compressed michelin mascot looking woman. Am I the asshole?
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So I’m a 21 year old student and I work in a bar too, if i’m not drowning in assignments i’m drowning in work. My sister in law (27) has been with my brother (31) for about 5 years now. They moved to a new town about 3 years ago where my SIL met her now best friend (32F)
Don’t get me wrong my SIL and I have a great relationship, we joke around, cook together generally have fun and have good conversations but there’s this ongoing thing that just really pisses me off. Her bestfriend who is 11 years older than me keep in mind is into me, like REALLY into me.. Whatever feelings she has she’s clearly told my SIL about saying she just needs to have some fun after having her kid (7) and ‘not getting any’ since then.
I’ve met her and she’s got a good personality but I’m not into her looks wise,I can’t help myself I’m sorry. Regardless of that, my SIL decided to take matters into her own hands and has been barking at me for a year that I should just go sleep with her friend.. that I’ll enjoy it, it’ll make her friend happy and to just give it a go for one night. Honestly makes me uncomfortable. When I do say no she gets all butthurt saying i’m leading her friend on when i’m just nice to her.. as I am to everyone.
Last week, my SIL invited me over for dinner and look behold her best friend was there all dressed up at the table. We greeted each other as normal and sat down to eat and her best friend starts making conversation with me and starts flirting real hard.. like to the point it makes me kind of cringe. As we’re getting up to leave (I was forced to drive her home because that’s gentlemanly and how are you gonna let a woman go home on her own this late at night?) So cool whatever we get to her apartment, I stop the car and say “Alright bye, get in safe” and I kid you not this woman jumps at me starts kissing me and grabbing my little friend for no apparent reason. I push away and ask her what she’s doing and she says “I thought you were feeling me as much I was feeling you” I said “I don’t wanna hurt your feelings but I would never be more than a friend to you I’m sorry”
Next morning I get calls from my SIL telling me I’m a jerk and a manipulator, that I don’t respect women and that ‘clearly I have no empathy for a woman who is suffering’ to which I just said ‘Suffering from what? Getting no d***? That’s not my problem’ and hung up. I’ve been getting loads of texts which I’m ignoring but now even my brother is getting involved saying I just sleep with her for one night and then leave it all alone. I told him no too.
All 3 of them are kind of coming at me calling me a jerk because I’m young and single and don’t have any commitments etc and I should at least give her a chance. I’m starting to feel bad because it messes up the vibe we’ve got with my brother and SIL but I won’t force myself to sleep with a compressed michelin mascot looking woman. Am I the asshole?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I feel like the asshole because my SIL told me the backstory of her friends life and the man she was with, who didn’t really give her anything to work with and kept cheating on her so essentially she wasted 10 years of her life on him, they broke up 3 years ago and since then she’s had no action because she now is a single mother who has to provide for her son and for her family. Maybe the way I acted and spoke to her wasn’t the best and I feel bad because she’s going through a lot.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
None of this happened.
Obviously NTA this is utterly unhinged
Honestly, this is fucking wild. Could you imagine if the genders were reversed? “just sleep with him for one night he’s so lonely” 🤢 gross behavior.
OP you are NTA and I would start publicly putting them on blast
You’re not the asshole. If the sexes were reversed, this would be discussed very differently.
That said, I’d hit it. Even if she wasn’t attractive. As long as she didn’t stink.
NTA, not in the least. Everyone else? Creepy as fuck. Holy shit dude. If the roles were reversed everyone would be calling this sexual harassment because that is clearly what it is.
I would go no contact with the lot of them. I mean block everyone.
I’m starting to wonder if this is a real post because obvious is obvious.
NTA you were sexually assaulted. Your SIL and brother are disgusting and have no respect for you or your boundaries.
Being single does not make you public property!
This is disgusting, predatory behavior. Your sister in law is not your friend. Does your brother know??