I (22F) live with my parents currently.
At the moment my mom (52F) & my dad (51M) are fighting, for the past three days.
Let’s come to the reason :
On friday night last week, me and my mom went for a sleepover to meet my maternal grandparents who were living with my mom’s middle brother, as they were travelling to live with my mom’s youngest brother. My dad & my brother (15M) stayed back at home as my brother had an exam on sunday.
On Saturday, my brother and my dad came, to meet his in-laws, as well. Day went find and we 4 were supposed to come home together, and in the evening attend a cultural dance event in our society. But the thing was, my grandparents are old and sick, and even if my mom was getting one more day to spend with them, then why not. So me and my mom stayed back. My brother & dad went home, only reason was that my brother had an exam on sunday morning.
On Sunday morning, me and my mom were home by 8:30 AM. My brother was crying and saying that he’d leave the paper blank. That he would rather leave school and start selling peanuts by the road. Somehow we’ve sent him to give the exam. When he came back, he said that the paper was fine, but he was still upset about something.
Let’s talk about what he was upset about. On Saturday, when my brother & dad came back home, my dad wanted to go to the cultural event however, my brother is not much of a social person. Even I wasn’t, but with age, I’ve started liking it, music festivals, dance etc. Anyways, this turned into a huge fight between my brother & dad, where dad is telling him that he’s lethargic, lazy, lifeless, and my brother then asked him to go to the event alone. The way my brother told me, he was pretty rude to dad.
Since then, dad hasn’t spoken to anyone properly.
Now, the second part.
My dad blamed my mom of teaching us (their kids) to be disrespectful to him. No energy, lifeless, like my mom is (his words). This turned into a fight between my parents. Where he mentioned that he’s just a convenience to us for money, and that we are all gold diggers in his life.
I want to mention that he’s a serial cheater. Just putting it there, and my mom decided to forgive him.
This morning, my parents spoke to each other about something and apparently my dad has used words for my mother which she can’t tell me. All she knows is that, she can’t live here. She has already found a house to rent, and a hotel to stay at before the formalities for the rented house are complete. She is asking me and my brother to move with her.
I am starting a new job next week, which pays alright. I wanted to move closer to my office, but this whole situation won’t make me.
About my whole parent situation, I’m done, honestly. Plus I have no involvement. It’s their life, me and my brother just have to adjust / adapt to it.
So I’m asking, AITA for wanting to move in alone in a separate house when my parents are already in separation?
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I (22F) live with my parents currently.
At the moment my mom (52F) & my dad (51M) are fighting, for the past three days.
Let’s come to the reason :
On friday night last week, me and my mom went for a sleepover to meet my maternal grandparents who were living with my mom’s middle brother, as they were travelling to live with my mom’s youngest brother. My dad & my brother (15M) stayed back at home as my brother had an exam on sunday.
On Saturday, my brother and my dad came, to meet his in-laws, as well. Day went find and we 4 were supposed to come home together, and in the evening attend a cultural dance event in our society. But the thing was, my grandparents are old and sick, and even if my mom was getting one more day to spend with them, then why not. So me and my mom stayed back. My brother & dad went home, only reason was that my brother had an exam on sunday morning.
On Sunday morning, me and my mom were home by 8:30 AM. My brother was crying and saying that he’d leave the paper blank. That he would rather leave school and start selling peanuts by the road. Somehow we’ve sent him to give the exam. When he came back, he said that the paper was fine, but he was still upset about something.
Let’s talk about what he was upset about. On Saturday, when my brother & dad came back home, my dad wanted to go to the cultural event however, my brother is not much of a social person. Even I wasn’t, but with age, I’ve started liking it, music festivals, dance etc. Anyways, this turned into a huge fight between my brother & dad, where dad is telling him that he’s lethargic, lazy, lifeless, and my brother then asked him to go to the event alone. The way my brother told me, he was pretty rude to dad.
Since then, dad hasn’t spoken to anyone properly.
Now, the second part.
My dad blamed my mom of teaching us (their kids) to be disrespectful to him. No energy, lifeless, like my mom is (his words). This turned into a fight between my parents. Where he mentioned that he’s just a convenience to us for money, and that we are all gold diggers in his life.
I want to mention that he’s a serial cheater. Just putting it there, and my mom decided to forgive him.
This morning, my parents spoke to each other about something and apparently my dad has used words for my mother which she can’t tell me. All she knows is that, she can’t live here. She has already found a house to rent, and a hotel to stay at before the formalities for the rented house are complete. She is asking me and my brother to move with her.
I am starting a new job next week, which pays alright. I wanted to move closer to my office, but this whole situation won’t make me.
About my whole parent situation, I’m done, honestly. Plus I have no involvement. It’s their life, me and my brother just have to adjust / adapt to it.
So I’m asking, AITA for wanting to move in alone in a separate house when my parents are already in separation?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1. Action I took : Expressing to move in into a separate house. As my dad is going to be living separately and my mom and brother will be living together, without dad. I am supposed to live with mom, but I want to move in a place of my own.
2. What might make me the AH: Wanting to move when my mom is in a vulnerable state.
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA but I feel sorry for your brother
NTA: You moving out for work at your age is normal.
You’re 22. Who cares.
NTA
I truly don’t understand what any of the other family stuff has to do with it though. If I had to judge based on the whole story you’d get a y t a for writing down so much unnecessary extra bullshit.
NTA but I have the feeling that moving out is a much bigger deal in your culture than in some other cultures. Even so, I would still say it’s your best option for peace and quiet.
NTA. First off, you and your brother should not be involved with your parental discourse. 2nd you’re an adult, do what’s right for you, your brother will have to choose thou.
NTA! Get away from this circus and start your own life. You don’t owe your mother or father anything including supporting their own bad choices.
NTA.You have conflicted parents in an unhappy household. You want some peace and by looks of it you will only get that living on your own on your terms.
You are an adult now. Good for you to want to live on your own without depending on anyone else. As simple as that. You would be NTA regardless of whether your parents are getting divorced or not.
Not at all. Happy for your Mom and brother to get out of there as well.
NTA you’re an adult and if you want to live on your own and can afford it, you should do it. It sounds like your dad is extremely difficult, and like your mom can afford to live on her own too, so there’s no reason for you not to go off on your own.