I’ve been with my boyfriend for 5 years, and I feel stuck in this cycle where every single disagreement turns into him insulting me. A few days ago, we got into a small disagreement and yet again before I knew it he was calling me names. This isn’t a one-time thing. In the past, he’s called me all sorts of names, tells me I’m fking annoying, or worse, pretty much any time we fight. No matter what the argument is about, it always ends with name calling or hurtful comments. I’ve tried telling him how much it hurts, but every time I do it’s always dismissed and somehow it’s my fault because my actions “made” him react like that. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t even bring up how badly what he said hurt me after an argument, because I know if I do he’ll either go back to being angry, or just blame me again. Every time we argue I end up feeling worthless and like I can’t stand up for myself without being torn down. I don’t even know what I’m asking here. Maybe I just need to know if I’m not crazy for thinking this is toxic. Has anyone else gone through this? How did you deal with it?
TL;DR: My boyfriend of several years calls me names in every argument. I’ve told him it hurts but he dismisses me and blames me. I feel worthless and don’t know if I’m overreacting