For context, I (26m) and my father (55m) work a the same company, he is an executive at this company, I am a “lower level” employee. We have a hunting trip coming up soon that we have been planning since March of this year. Today my father told me that the President of our company will be joining us for the 2 week hunt. I told him im no longer interested in going on the trip if our pres will be there.
Here’s my dilemma, I smoke cannabis for pain and sleep aid, we are not allowed thc at this company. I also would like to drink a little bit while im out there relaxing, how am I supposed to enjoy being away from work with my President/Owner in the mix of our trip? The whole point of going out hunting for 2 weeks, is so we can escape from work, and those we work with. I dont want to have to walk on eggshells during a trip I’ve been waiting 6 months for. My father is pissed that I dont want to go, but he’s not seeing it from my POV. AITA?
I guess I need to add, I dont want this “networking opportunity”.
I’ll also add, I can go without alcohol and weed, still doesn’t mean I want to spend 2 weeks with my pres
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For context, I (26m) and my father (55m) work a the same company, he is an executive at this company, I am a “lower level” employee. We have a hunting trip coming up soon that we have been planning since March of this year. Today my father told me that the President of our company will be joining us for the 2 week hunt. I told him im no longer interested in going on the trip if our pres will be there.
Here’s my dilemma, I smoke cannabis for pain and sleep aid, we are not allowed thc at this company. I also would like to drink a little bit while im out there relaxing, how am I supposed to enjoy being away from work with my President/Owner in the mix of our trip? The whole point of going out hunting for 2 weeks, is so we can escape from work, and those we work with. I dont want to have to walk on eggshells during a trip I’ve been waiting 6 months for. My father is pissed that I dont want to go, but he’s not seeing it from my POV. AITA?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> I may be the asshole because im backing out of a teip thats been planned for 6 months
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
Nta
But understand that this is a career opportunity. Maybe it doesn’t matter to you because you already have an in, but you will essentially be missing an opportunity that might not come again.
NAH
Look, you do you, and your father has done nothing wrong either.
My 2¢
You should go. Your father invited the president to help you advance in the company. He’s doing you a favor and is pissed at you, because you can’t see what a HUGE opportunity this is.
This is how the world works. You advance by networking and based on who you know.
An addition 2¢
> I smoke cannabis for pain and sleep aid
If this is self-medicating, see a fucking doctor. Multiple if you need to, one for the pain, one for a sleep study.
NTA; you had me at smoking cannabis. Your father’s turned this into a quasi-business trip; you need to be away from corporate’s prying eyes.
“My father is pissed that I dont want to go, but he’s not seeing it from my POV. AITA?”
Kind of, yes, YTA. You are not an asshole for backing out of a trip that is not the trip you had planned – but for the reasons behind your decision.
YTA because you want to get drunk hunting, perhaps quite so, but do not want to make a bad impression on the boss with your drinking habit.
YTA because you are in violation of your employment requirements and, absent any legitimate medical basis for doing so, you are hiding this from your family and your employer. If there is a “no thc” policy in place one may assume vehicles, heavy equipment, or machinery is involved in your day to day tasks. You’d be fucked if you made a mistake, someone got hurt, and you failed a pee test. I don’t know if your dad’s position at work but I imagine his reputation would take a hit if you were found to be in violation of the drugs policy and he would definitely suffer in the latter scenario. You’re an adult but your decision making seems not to be.
I don’t know if marijuana is legal where you live, or whether medical exemptions are available, or any of the finer details, and those might be helpful to know… but right now this post reads like “I want to get high every day but the boss man won’t let me, ugh!”
NTA, your father has ruined this trip. No way in hell would I spend two weeks living with the company president, when you’re supposed to be on vacation. As in, away from work. As for your cannabis consumption, gummies exist.
Perhaps you could try to substitute gummies during the trip. It’d be worth a try since this inevitably you will have another travel situation where smoking won’t be allowed. Also, understand that the president will probably be drinking just as much as everyone else, as it is a common social activity after a day spent outside hunting.
NAH. This could be a great networking opportunity but you are like “Oh no, I won’t be able to smoke weed”😆😆You don’t sound too clever to me, but no one here is an ah.
NTA-there is no way I would be taking 2 weeks of my time off to spend with someone from work.
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NAH. Go hear his POV and then really decide if you don’t wanna. It may be worth 2 wks.
Yta
It’s a massive opportunity, suck it up
YTA
Your father has scored a big opportunity for you, to bond socially with the head of your company. If you’re more interested in smoking weed than advancing your career, please tell that to your father immediately and spare him the humiliation of watching you screw up after he set the kick up for you.
You need some help. Medical, for that pain and sleep problem. And a counsellor to help to see past immediate gratification and a very narrow focus. Your POV is flawed.
Couldn’t you have a fever just in time for the trip or something? You know one of those white lies where (at least in theory) no one is at fault and they can go to their merry way while you stay at home?
Not an AH in sight. You’re blowing an opportunity and your dad’s pissed about it.
NTA just stupid. This is an excellent networking opportunity your father set up for you.
You’re not the villain here, but you’re overlooking a big opportunity. Consider your father’s perspective and the potential benefits of networking. You could find better ways to manage your relaxation without compromising career advancement. Think it through clearly.
Most higher up people I’ve known are the worst offenders
NTA People need rest.
Tbh the owner of the company probably smokes too bro. You’d be surprised as someone who works in the cannabis industry I always find it funny seeing who uses cannabis. Yall are to fragile, it’s weed not heroin. You can have a drink after work and it’s fine but weed oh no that’s the devils lettuce my mommy told me about that one lol. 😂
Honestly you should go and see it as an opportunity. I know where you’re coming from bro just want to chill smokes some good bud and go hunting but honestly that’s always going to be there and if you are at a low level this may be a chance to get to a higher level (no pun intended). If it’s cus you don’t like the job then shit try getting into the cannabis industry if it’s that important to you. I work with hash all day and I do our marketing. It’s not for the feint of heart tho I will say.
NAH
Why don’t you want the networking opportunity, may I ask? You’re a low level employee going to go out with an executive and the president. Your Dad seems to be doing well, he wants his son to be doing well, he’s trying to help you establish important work relationships.
On the other hand I absolutely understand your desire for a regular vacation.
NTA and it feels bananas pants that everyone is saying oh what a good networking opportunity to take a two week vacation with your BOSS. It would be 100% different if you were going and your dad said hey, I invited CEO Steve for the Saturday of our trip, he’ll take off by Sunday morning and we’re back to business (this one of fun.) It also sounds (with all the described structure) that this is likely a pretty corporate job which is just absolute layers of not a freaking chance.
I don’t even like going to work parties (off the clock anyway) because I have my own friends and life and I don’t need to split some 7 layer dip with my boss to get face time with the CEO.
YTA. Your dad’s an executive at a company and you’re basically the nepo-baby who got a “lower level” job while all you want to do is smoke pot and not have to be a professional. Harsh? That’s what your post sounds like. By all means, make sure your dad knows that smoking pot and drinking is more important to you than an incredibly networking opportunity. Bet you won’t have to worry about being a “lower level” employee for long after that.
NAH. You should look for a new job, though
NTA. Not wanting to spend vacation time with people you work with is perfectly acceptable. Not wanting to spend vacation time with people who have the ability to fire you is not only acceptable, it should be the default. If I were you, I’d tell Dad that you would love to go on a trip with him like you had planned, but since he added extra people to it without telling you, it is no longer that trip, it’s a trip that he and the company president are taking and have invited you on. You are declining that invitation.
NTA…weed aside most ppl would not want to spend 2 weeks on vacation with their boss be damned the opportunity, that sounds like the first level of hell to me.
NTA but your dad seems to be looking out for you and sadly life is all about connections. This could be huge for your life so you really should go kn the trip. Probably not the ideal trip you had planned but these two weeks could change your life in a very positive way.
NTA. If it was just a weekend, then doable but two weeks? Geez. Hell no. How about you show up for the first three days and make an excuse that you had plans with your friends?
Get some gummies, drink your beer and enjoy
NTA. Vacation is supposed to be a break from work and life to unwind. Knowing the president of your company is there is not helping you relax. I could see trying to make at least part of the trip if this is a career you’re interested in long term but that’s up to you
No way. I don’t even understand why the company pres would be into this. Let these two dudes hang out and your dad can spend meaningful time with his son later when he gets his head on straight.
Nta
Just go . It will be ok
All of you who think a company president taking a two week vacation with father and son employee is a valid and normal “networking opportunity” need to stop giving voice to your opinions until you’ve actually worked in corporate. This is NOT ok. Play golf. Go to dinner. Travel to a conference. Do NOT share personal time off time with your boss that is the kind of thing HR would girding themselves for layers of fallout. Absolutely not.
Generational differences getting in the way here. Your dad has the Boomer/Gen-X “It’s not what you know, it’s who you blow” mentality and is probably legitimately trying to get you a bonus leg up in the company. The problem is he didn’t bother to talk to you about it, and with it originally being a family trip he should have respected your thoughts enough to do that.
Unfortunately, your dad probably won’t see this through your eyes, so you may just have to absorb his bad attitude about it. At least tell him “you know, I was looking forward to this when it was just US, because it would have been good family time for us. I’m not happy you turned this into a business trip, but I’m actually kind of angry that you did it without even TALKING to me about changing plans. It makes me think you don’t have any respect for me or my wishes.” Air it out. Might not do any good, but at least it’s out on the table.
NTA
Going on vacation with your boss is weird.
Who want to spend 2 weeks with their boss NO ONE that’s who! NTA
President of the company more than likely will be cutting loose a little too. Relax have some fun take a camera. Enjoy the scenery. I wouldn’t be surprised if he brings a bottle of bourbon with him the president or he drinks a case of beer and falls down drunk into the campfire.