A college friend of mine has a habit of borrowing money from me for silly reasons ( buying an iPhone , Starbucks, etc) and never giving it back on promised timeline.
She recently asked a big amount ( reason – she is in a big trouble ) from me stating she will return it within 7 days. But i am afraid she will not return it so i said no .. am i doing anything wrong ?
Edit – she is my college friend and also she was my roommate during that period for 4 years … the whole 4 years i don’t remember and cannot estimate that how much money i have let her borrow from me for her silly activities..
Also she back bitched about me and hurt me so bad in our final year .. after that i formed a boundary and decided i will never help those who bitch about me ..
After 2 years she texted me yesterday to lend her a big amount to which i said no !!
2nd edit – sorry guys , but i need to rant .. it just like those 4 years of my life is spiralling in-front of me and with the comments i am realising what a fool i was ..
She comes from a wealthy background so am i .. the only difference between us i like to preserve my money she likes to spend over her budget .. she once told in-front of everyone “that i am jealous of her money and how much she spends , just because i once advised her not to play with her daddy’s money which will lead to a bad addiction and god forbid a situation comes where she is in need she will cry”!!
I AM BLOCKING HER FOR LIFE !!!!!!!!!!
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A college friend of mine has a habit of borrowing money from me for silly reasons ( buying an iPhone , Starbucks, etc) and never giving it back on promised timeline.
She recently asked a big amount ( reason – she is a big trouble ) from me stating she will return it within 7 days. But i am afraid she will not return it so i said no .. am i doing anything wrong ?
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OP has offered the following explanation for why they think they might be the asshole:
> 1 – i said no to her for the first time and didn’t give her any money.
2 – she mentioned she is in a big trouble .. i didn’t ask her further that what happened .. i just denied giving money stating i don’t have that much in hand
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Contest mode is 1.5 hours long on this post.
NTA
Stop lending people money.
Don’t ever lend anyone money unless you’re comfortable not ever getting that money back
Real friends don’t put real friends on the spot by asking for money. They figure it out or go without
iPhone and Starbucks, like they are similar 😆
How much is it for?
Tbh the answer should always be no. If they need money then they aren’t good for it.
NTA. I loaned money to friends twice. Once I was paid back, the other time I had to take them to small claims courts. Now I would never loan money, unless I was ok with not getting it back.
An iphone….. No you are NTA for not lending her the money, even if she always returned the money on time you are not obligated to financially support anyone. Considering they never pay back the money when they say they will I am surprised this seems to have gone on for so long. I would also consider if this is a friendship which you want to continue, she clearly does not respect you or appreciate how supportive you have been in the past.
NTA. She’s used you before and disrespected you, you owe her nothing, especially money. Setting boundaries after being burned isn’t cruel, it’s smart.
NTA, and NoNoNo to the ‘loan’. This person is no friend. They are a user who sees you only as a purse from which she can take.
NTA. You are also enabling her though. Tell her you cannot continue providing money to her or she will continue asking.
You haven’t spoken to her in 2 years? OP be serious, that’s not your friend
I never lend people money, especially family and friends.
But if I can afford it, I will Give someone money but make it known that it’s a gift and that there is no expectation of repayment.
She’s not your friend, she sees you as her personal lender that she doesn’t have to pay back! Stop letting people take advantage of you.
nta. you don’t owe her anything! honestly i wonder if u can take her to small claims court for everything she owes you…
NTA. Simply say “when I have lent you money in the past you have taken a long time to pay it back and I need that money for myself”.
Hell no, don’t do it
NTA
Sounds like her problems are her own doing. Why should it be your responsibility to fix them?
You’re being used here.