Hi Reddit,
I’m writing this with a heavy heart. I never thought I’d be sharing something this personal, but I can’t carry it all inside anymore.
My father remarried in 2022, and since then, everything has changed — especially him.
My stepmother constantly manipulates him, filling his mind with negativity. He used to be someone I could at least talk to, but now… he drinks almost every night and lashes out at me. I get verbally abused for no reason — horrible things no daughter should ever hear from her own father.
Yes, he still pays my fees. But over the past year, he’s started acting like even our existence irritates him. One day while drunk, he told me, “I’ll give you 20 lakhs, just get married and get out of my life.”
It broke me. As if I’m just a burden. Just because I’m a girl?
He says things like “Why don’t you just die?” or accuses me of ruining his life. I’ve done nothing except try to survive in a house that no longer feels like home.
The worst part? When my younger sister was seriously ill with jaundice in February, he and my stepmother were secretly planning a mannat (a vow/prayer) for having a baby. We only found out because of a secret recording. In it, my father used a disgusting Telugu slang — “lanjakurthu” (meaning prostitute) — and blamed my sick sister for not being able to perform their religious ritual.
How can a father say something like that?
How do I live in a house where I’m constantly insulted, blamed, and told I don’t matter?
I don’t even feel like I can talk to him anymore. He switches between pretending to care when she’s not around, and turning completely against us when she is. It’s destroying me emotionally. I still love him, but I don’t recognize him anymore.
I just needed to get this out. If anyone out there has been through something like this… how did you cope? How did you survive?
Thank you for listening.
Comments
Four posts on four subreddits in four minutes? Why?
I’m sorry you’re going through this. Your experience reminds me of my senior year when my father kicked my mother out and tried to replace her with a whino. The sad thing I had to come to terms with (and admittedly, it took me 10-15 years to accept) is that the character your father is exhibiting now is probably who he’s always been, and that even if he divorces this woman, he’s not going to revert. This woman just gives him the excuse to be a POS, and I hope you have an exit plan in place or in progress before he fucks you up mentally for life.