Hi guys, I’m going to get straight to the point.
Two weeks ago, I (23f) had a one-night stand with a guy (21M) I’ve known since we were kids — let’s call him Todd. We both grew up in the same small town in England, and I genuinely thought I could trust him. I’d had a bit too much to drink, and one thing led to another. I didn’t think much of it afterward, just chalked it up to a messy night and moved on.
Today, I met up with my two older half-sisters (32F and 37F) for drinks. After a while, they told me their dad heard about what happened, and that Todd has been going around bragging to pretty much everyone in town. Not just bragging, but saying things like; “She’s the easiest girl to sleep with in town”, “She smells so bad down there but a hole’s a goal” and “She’s begging me to sleep with her again”
I haven’t even spoken to him since that night. I don’t have his number. I didn’t ask to see him again. I feel sick, but mostly angry, thinking about the way he’s talking about me — and even worse knowing people are probably laughing and judging me.
For context: I was in a committed relationship for 6 years, from high school through university. We broke up two years ago, and I haven’t been with anyone since. I’ve been taking my time to heal and wasn’t even planning on hooking up with anyone. This was the first time in years I let my guard down, and I regret it more than anything.
What hurts even more is how my sisters reacted. Instead of supporting me, I got a lecture about how I “need to be more careful” and shouldn’t be “sleeping around.” I spent the entire night trying to justify my actions to them, trying to explain that I’m not a (insert the S word for women). I’m just a women that trusted the wrong guy.
I feel so humiliated and disgusted with myself.
Edit: Now I’ve calmed down, I would love some advice on how to deal with this situation. What do I do if its brought up to me? I also I want to confront Todd and knock him for six but that’s probably not the best idea
Comments
Please don’t be hard/down on yourself. Any man (i use the term loosely here) who brags about/demeans (sic) a partner isn’t up to much. You don’t need to be careful, in my humble opinion. But your step sisters would benefit from supportive humility. You deserve better. And that’s in you.
If I were you I would start telling common friends that you regret hooking up with Todd, that it was your worst sexual experience because he has a small package and he doesn’t know how to use it. Or something around these lines.😄
I’m sorry you feel bad at all about anything. You shouldn’t. You didn’t do anything wrong. This guy, our “Todd” is an asshole for talking all over town about his event. People like him exist, and it sucks that they do. I’m sorry you had to find out the hard way that those types are out there.
I can’t relate to the small town experience and all those factors, but can imagine it must make this very hard. I’m sorry you’re going through that. Only advice is be kind to yourself. Since your two sisters aren’t giving you the support you need and deserve, look elsewhere to someone you can trust in real life to provide that support and in the meantime take solace from us internet strangers that you’ve done nothing wrong and in fact have been wronged by one or more assholes (Todd and sisters).
Hope you feel better and can heal.
Girl, he’s giving you the gift of returning the favor. He has the smallest dick you’ve ever seen (I don’t like body shaming, but he started it). He has this weird as kink he couldn’t get hard without. He came after a minute and then cried while apologizing profusely. Etc. Etc.
Let your imagination go wild and repeat ad nauseam. Two can play that game. Go have a little fun with it. If anyone deserves it, it’s him.
That sucks u had to go thru this. Some men are natural immature dick heads. It rlly sounds like something a high school boy would do 🤮 NOT a grown ah man
So here’s what you do. You mention to mutuals that you did something so embarrassing you can hardly believe it yourself. You got drunk and slept with Todd and you don’t want to talk bad about him, but it was just really messy and not good. Be sure to mention you haven’t spoken to him or seen him since, and you don’t even have his number to get in contact with him so you hope he’s not upset or anything (play dumb).
It’s owning the story in your own way, you’re admitting that yes, it happened, but it wasn’t like Todd said it was. He’ll look like an ass for bragging about something you’re calling embarrassing and sloppy and saying you don’t even have a way to contact him shuts down his claim you’re after him.