Me and my girlfriend, have been talking for about six months. Last night, things got pretty heated between us, and I’m feeling lost. We had plans to go hiking today. But then she told me she didn’t want to go hiking because her daughter, wasn’t feeling well. I was really looking forward to it, but I agreed to go on Sunday instead.
We started talking about me staying over on Saturday night and just pulling an all-nighter. At some point, expressed that I was happy her daughter was coming along too, but I wasn’t sure she had mentioned that to me earlier, so I got confused. I didn’t mean it in a bad way, but I think I upset her by questioning it.
As the conversation went on, I told her to call me I had fallen asleep by the time she did which wasn’t too long after about 30 minutes after.. she got super frustrated and said I was “sketchy” because I wasn’t answering her calls when she tried reaching me. I was exhausted from work.. 4 A.M. comes around.. I get a call answer it, but she kept saying that in the past, I would always answer her calls. She was really upset, and I felt like I couldn’t get through to her.
Eventually, she told me she was “done” and that she didn’t want to talk to me anymore. I tried explaining myself and sent her a screenshot of my call log, but it just made things worse. Now she’s saying that I’m lying and that she’s hurt, and I don’t know what to do. I feel like she doesn’t trust me, and I don’t know how to fix it.
I’ve been working a lot, and I just wanted to sleep early. it was around midnight, but now it feels like I’ve messed everything up. I just don’t know how to fix this. Is this a red flag, or is it just a misunderstanding? How do I rebuild trust after this?
Comments
From my point of view, the lack of communication is always a red flag, not to say the 4AM ultimatum, who does call someone so late at night?
Maybe it’s the best for you two.
You didn’t do anything wrong here necessarily, it looks like it’s just compounding misunderstandings. Maybe with some trust issues thrown in. Maybe it’s a lack of communication issue on your part, or maybe she is overreacting. Possibly a mixture of both. If the relationship just isn’t working then it would be best to move on. However if she comes back and says she wants to keep trying, then only do it if you both can agree to work on your trust/communication issues.
Sadly, this is kind of her problem. It sounds like maybe she was upset by somethings but didn’t voice or express it clearly or has some sort of trauma about being abandoned, so when you didn’t pick up her call she felt abandoned and neglected, enough for her to just say that she was done.
It seems like a red flag to me but perhaps with some time maybe a few days to a week things could resolve once her emotions calm down a bit more? I’m not exactly sure what the timeline was and there’s quite abit of context missing here.
Hey girl… Sometimes these relationship dramas can spiral into an intense mess. It’s clear both of you were feeling some deep frustration and betrayal. The key here is to have a real, honest talk about what went down, don’t just assume you know what the other person was thinking/feeling. Ground rules for future conversations could help too… but you gotta put in the effort to listen without jumping to conclusions, yeah? It ain’t gonna be easy, but if you both really want to make this work, it’s doable