I am 23F my partner is 21M, we’ve been together just over two years. My brother (who was 21M) and my best friend (also 21M) both passed away very suddenly and tragically just over a month ago.
Lately things have been so difficult. Not difficult like, we’re done for. If anything, I feel so much more secure than I ever did before. We talked about getting engaged last night & how we’re ready.
Its just, lately he’s been picking up on allll my slack. I feel very guilty. I feel he deserves to have a better partner. And by that I don’t mean leaving me.
I want to open our relationship for him, we can be poly and he could have another partner to support him through this grieving process. And then we can still get married and have our babies like we planned.
The thing is. We’ve been open-ish in the past and it’s always been very difficult for me personally. I think him having another partner would eat me alive.. but he deserves it, I feel this way so strongly. I feel like if he doesn’t find another person to make better memories with, the guilt is just gonna eat me alive.
I’m just not sure what to do right now. Any thoughts on this?
Also, if anyone’s been through a grieving process and stayed together, I would love any tips or advice you can extend. We are so young. I’m not worried about us not working out, the way we’ve been functioning lately just confirms to me he’s my life partner. But any ideas on some things I/we can do to make this process more manageable?
I tried to post this in r/relationship_advice but was unable to due to flags
TL;DR : my brother & my best friend passed away, I am wanting to open my relationship for my partners sake and having complicated feelings on it
Comments
What are your boyfriend’s thoughts on opening the relationship? Is this your idea or his?