I don’t usually talk about this kind of stuff, but I need to get it off my chest.
There’s this girl I really like. Back then, me and my friends used to joke around and say who we’d wanna f**k, and we included her too. It felt like dumb teenage stuff at the time, but now I regret it. She’s not someone to joke about like that. She’s special. And I hate that I was ever part of something that disrespected her like that.
Now, I don’t just have a crush. I genuinely love her. I’ve dreamed about her, literally—she’s shown up in my sleep more than once. It’s like she’s stuck in my head and my heart. I think about her all the time, and not in a messed up way. I love her for who she is.
But if she’s not the one for me, if she’s not meant to be in my life like that… then I want God to take her out of my heart. Because this feeling hurts when you know you might never be with them. I don’t want to hold onto something that’s not meant to last. I just want peace.
Thanks for reading.
Comments
Two things – You say you love her. What is it about her that you love?
Listen to Garth Brooks Unanswered prayers on YouTube
Hugs big sister
Well, that’s a lot to process… It’s so brave of you to share this, honestly. Regret is a heavy thing to carry, and you’re right to feel it, those jokes, they hurt, didn’t they? It’s good that you recognize that now, at least. Unrequited love… it’s a tricky beast, always yearning for something you can’t have, a really painful situation. Maybe it’s time to let it go completely, to find some peace of mind. It’s okay to grieve the “what ifs,” isn’t it? I suspect you’ll find your way. REALLY
Do you spend time with her? Are you friends?
If not, then it may be more of an infatuation than anything else. It feels real but it’s not.
Damn honesty is key, especially when it comes to your own feelings and mistakes. It’s like that old saying goes: “you can’t build a relationship on lies”… or something like that anyway. I’m really impressed by how you’re owning up to your past crudeness towards this woman, it takes guts to admit when we’ve been total pricks and actually make amends for it. If you’re sincere about changing and being a better partner, then there’s at least hope, but don’t expect her to instantly forgive you either
Ask her out before it’s too late