I met her at the same time as my ex-wife, she was very pretty and I liked her a lot but she wasn’t clear at all, and I decided on my ex-wife, now I have a very good and pretty partner and I’m happy with her, but I can’t get that girl out of my head.
Any advice or comments, I don’t understand why I think about her so much.
Comments
Scarcity keeps someone on your mind. Love doesn’t do that.
You’re just with your partner to replace the one you can’t forget…be real.
“Not a therapist here, but it seems like you’re romanticizing and putting this girl on a pedestal—filling in the blanks about her with your own ideas of who she is
You can’t forget her, because she is the girl that got away. Probably when you met her, it wasn’t the right timing. Sometimes they say timing is everything kn regards with finding a partner.
I had met a girl and we dated long distance. I really loved her. She was really successful and confident and gorgeous…she would laugh ALL the time and it was so infectious.
However I broke up with her due to the distance. It started to get to me and while I never lead on, I was starting to feel insecure and that’s very unusual for me.
Like 9 months later I met another woman and eventually married her. All 9 months and the 3 years of our marriage I couldn’t get the first girl out of me head. I always found my self thinking “god I wish she was here” and sometimes she would pop into my head during sex.
Long story short I confessed all of this to me wife and we tried therapy but it didn’t take. We ended up getting divorced and the girl who was always on my mind is married to another man. This was 5 years ago and she still is on my mind sometimes.
My best advice to you is don’t let anything pass you by. Personally, how I felt…was that I kept this from my wife for THREE years which means she never really knew me or what I was going through. It’s not the worst idea in the world to be 100% honest because it will be better in the end.
That girl literally eats her own boogers
You didn’t get to know her well enough to learn that but she absolutely digs for ore in her nose gold mine and pans for that shit on her teeth
Think you might need closer to know she was nit the one?
Unlike people who you are/were actually in a relationship with – people you never dated didn’t have the chance to get on your nerves and show you their annoying sides. If you had chosen that other girl you would probably think the same way about the one who is now your ex-wife.
Joji – Glimpse of Us
(listen)
I think it’s the “what ifs” turning into intrusive thoughts. The more you try to not think about her the more you will. Be open and let the thoughts in and pass. Do you get intrusive thoughts about other things? Like thinking things you would never do and being disturbed by them? Or things you don’t want to think about or things you’re not supposed to think about?
Try to write it out on an online journal what you are experiencing. Sometimes when you see what you write down, your brain can process it better. When you’re ready, you can bring the topic up to your current partner. She will feel betrayed and jealous, but she will gain trust and appreciation for you if you are open about these taboo subjects.
Remember that true love is not infatuation or attraction.
Remember true love is steady and slow in the best way possible. There’s nothing wrong with you. I wish you all the best.
I didn’t choose her because she wasn’t clear at all, she told me that she had a boyfriend and yet we went out together, we kissed, I liked her a lot, she was cultured and very pretty, but it coincided that at the same time I met my ex, a pretty and direct Chinese woman and this convinced me, now I have a partner who meets all my expectations but she comes back to my head, I guess it was like a coitus interruptus, when we separated without explanations it is as if something had been left pending
Limerence. Totally know how you feel. I’m kinda right there with you. Can’t stop thinking about this person and it’s been a year. But they bread crumb. So it’s not entirely my fault? But it’s definitely my fault for not decking to move on.
Well, she not thinking about you 😂 get over it. You know, if your wife was having the same situation you wouldn’t be feeling that.
get her outta ye head before you lose everything lol if you do something stupid or just keep romanticizing and doing nothing but that’s not healthy for you and her actually. just life the good life you have people would kill for man.