I’m an ex-addict, clean for two almost three years.
But I’ve been struggling a lot recently with going back. I use to do ❄️ and recently my life has been very rocky. A bad breakup a few months ago, I lost my job and can’t seem to pull myself out of this depressive rut I find myself in.
The worst part is, is that I know exactly where I can get more. I know who to call, who to text and how much it is. And not really anyone can stop me from getting it other than me. How do you guys cope or stay away from it? I’m finding it harder and harder with every passing day.
Comments
talk to people you know. Express all that you can and want. You’re not alone in the struggle and relapsing will do the opposite of improving your situation long term, so keep that firmly in mind with any decisions you take. It takes a lot of work, but we can all manage to get out of the hole given enough effort
Because you already objectively know what the loop will look like and that it won’t make anything better.
It’s a path already travelled. Its boring. Its predictable. Its unproductive.
Time for a new path that offers change and excitement.
What are you doing on a daily, weekly, monthly basis for your physical, mental and spiritual health? If you are someone who has the disease of addiction and not just someone who was temporarily addicted to a substance, you need to actively work on those three things or you will regress. And regress. And regress until you convince yourself that the only thing that will make you feel better is a substance – “relapse before the relapse”.
I’m an addict. I don’t use any mood or mind altering substances anymore but I’m actively working on those three things. Even after 12 years of sobriety, if I slack off and start to regress, I get wavering thoughts that I should use.
Regardless of how you feel, do not relapse.
When things turn to shit, or feel like shit, or I find myself avoiding a problem (even if I think I have a good reason for the avoidance) I’ve learned to remind myself that this is trying to teach me something. And if I’m patient and keep doing my best, even if my “best” some days isn’t very much at all, eventually I’ll learn whatever it was that that situation was trying to teach me. If I fall back to shitty coping mechanisms that I know are actively hurting me, I’m just delaying the lesson and it’s gonna be that much more of a pain in the ass to deal with in the future.
hey man! i know it is tough and i wish you all the power in the world to get trough this
you already managed to do the hardest part when you quit
i only quit smoking and only not much more than a year ago but when i get the urge it always helps to take a mental note of the things that made me quit
try relying on your friends if any are available, just talk to them, tell them how life sucks ass right now and just hang out
alternatively you could try looking for a therapy with a psychologist
Go to a meeting, talk to your sponsor or do anything to get out of your own head. That is the worse place you can be.
Outside of having a good support group or going to a meeting or excommunicating myself from people who use, I learned how to reframe my struggle. Early recovery was difficult for me. The first couple years were spend trying to get my shit together, relationships, working a job, going to meetings, UAs for the PO, court dates, knowing that when I get sentenced, I’ll definitely do prison time, all the while I was dealing with unmanaged anxiety I knew little about. But, I stayed clean.
This relationship was the one that was most critical: going through rough times WITHOUT using. Learning how to get though it while you go through it. This is where lasting change happens. Discomfort and change or like best friends; you never see one without the other. I looked at all my problems and stress as an OPPORTUNITY to react in a healthy way instead of the way I always did before. Over time, I realized that life struggles started to become less stressful and more manageable.
Ex-alcoholic here.
For me, the answer was willpower. I’m not a strong or decisive person by any means, but the one thing that has kept me sober is the knowledge of how bad everything would be if I relapsed.
I’m truly sorry that you’re going through such a hard time, but deep down, you know what will happen if you go back. Whatever life throws at you, you’re infinitely more capable of overcoming it if you have a clear head. Do whatever it takes.
Best of luck!
90% will power, 8% friends and support. 1% mysterious ways of the universe.
Go to some meetings. Helping others is critical. Plug yourself into the recovery community. If NA isn’t your thing i know tons of ex dope fiends in AA. ✋
If you have a good idea, call your sponsor. If you have a great idea, go to their house.
Idleness is the devils workshop. Get something to do, get a goal, could be anything, jogging, woodworking, volunteer at the local cat shelter, literally anything, but do not sit idle. That moment you have nothing to do, its the moment you mind start to race. Stay strong!