Is not wanting to hear someone else’s issues right now that unreasonable? I’ve told him via text in person, more than a couple times . I love him and wish him well but at this moment in my life I can’t handle hearing peoples problems . For some reason he continues to call me and complain about his issues after a quick how’s my spouse then boom into his issues . My shoulders can’t handle his problems right now as when he lets me know them over and over . I’ve asked set boundaries and in one ear and out the other. Do I just block him at this point if he can’t accept that I can’t handle extra stress right now ? I wish I could be his ear as he does have some actual issues to deal with but I can’t be that guy right now .
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Sit him down one last time, make it clear that this is the last time, and if he does it again you will block him. Make it clear that there are no exceptions. Be angry, be upset, dont hide your feelings about this, because he needs to understand that you are not ok right now.
And make good on that threat, no more chances. If you have other family who understands tell them what you are doing so they can make sure he understands why hes been blocked, and can keep you updated if anything really serious happens.
I’m really sorry about your partner.
I’ve been in OP’s shoes.
‘If you can’t look after yourself, you are not in the position to look after anyone.’
This saying helped me put up boundaries to people like OP’s brother. Be blunt. Say it like it is. Don’t ‘beat around the bush’. If brother doesn’t get it or gets nasty- look into blocking/screening calls/let it go to voicemail.