So this guy and I have been talking for a bit over 3 months now, and so far, things have been great. Over the past few weeks, I’ve come to the conclusion that I’d like the be with him and make things official, but I’m worried I’m starting to get cold feet. This is something I’ve struggled with in the past and would like to overcome.
Asking for a bit of grace here because I’m already hard on myself about this, but usually, just as I feel things getting serious there’s a voice in my head that says, “Yeah but this won’t be a forever thing. They’ll be more people to experience these things with in the future. This isn’t your person.” I hate that I start to think that because I do really like this person. This feels a lot different from other connections I’ve had in the best way possible, and just a few weeks ago, I was relieved I hadn’t had that thought…but here we are. TL;DR When this does come up, I ask myself “Do I think this because I actually know in my gut that this isn’t my person? Or am I just scared of committing because I associate relationships with feeling trapped.” I should also note that I’ve never been in love before and I’m used to having situationships that come with a certain amount of emotional distance. I really want to push myself to take a chance on a deep connection with someone, but I’m so used to this thought pattern, that it’s hard to differentiate whether or not it deserves so much of my attention. Any thoughts or advice would be appreciated!