What has been your experience with male roommates who aren’t family nor your partner?
What has been your experience with male roommates who aren’t family nor your partner?
r/AskWomen
What has been your experience with male roommates who aren’t family nor your partner?
Comments
one is still my best friend! one i hooked up with a couple of times (terrible decision), and he stalked me after i moved out. YMMV 🙃
I’ve had some great male roommates that turned into great friendships. My early twenties I had tonnes of roommates both male and female and we always had great fun. Your roommates kind of become your family which is nice when you’re just starting out on our own.
They expect you to clean up after them. I lived with my gay guy friend and he never cleaned anything (the kitchen, the floors, the shower, NOTHING). Then had to audacity to get upset with me when things weren’t spotless. At the end of the day he was still a man.
NOT GOOD. He moved out with 1 days notice a week before next month’s rent was due and stole all my weed on the way out which was stored in my nightstand in my bedroom along with other personal items. Made me wonder what else he looked through before finding what he was after.
It really depends. I’ve had male roommates that really sucked and the living arrangement didn’t last long. The last male roommates I had were awesome. They were both my friends and we all got along great, our house was the hangout spot for our social circle, there were never any disagreements, and it worked out well until we were renovicted.
I had three male roommates, but each at separate times. It was fine. We got along, they weren’t gross. One had a really annoying girlfriend who used to eat my food, but the roommate himself was fine. One was very much not fine, but it wasn’t because he was male. It’s because he was a low-level criminal and not bright at all, so I didn’t feel safe having him in the house. I had no roommates, male or female, who would clean the bathroom or bring in the trashcan from the curb on pickup day.
I will say that a lot of people assumed there was “something going on” between me and the male roommates, but there absolutely was not.
I’ve only had one male roommate and we aren’t close friends, but we’re friendly. I lucked that he’s really nice and clean! But when I move out, I think I want to change to female roommates or by myself, it’s just not the same as having a male roommate.
it was fine except he was stealing my baby oil and I’m literally just this second realizing he is gay and was probably not using it to moisturize his skin
I’m married, 10/10 do not recommend 😂
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Awful. Don’t do it. When I was in college I shared a house with 3 other people (2 women 2 men). Those dudes never cleaned anything. They just figured us girls would do it. Finally we got fed up and left. We moved in with another woman and left the guys to be pigs on their own. It was soooo much better
Not great. It’s a miracle he’s my oldest friend or that our friendship survived the screaming/yelling fights we had as roommates.
However, I am someone who does much better living alone. I’m not even thrilled about neighbours so potentially the issue could have had a lot to do with me.
They’ve been miles better than females. More fun to love with. Less drama. Tidier.
I prefer a male roommate to female.
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I had a good experience. Since I was older by 6 years there was a mutual respect. He was respectful and we both aligned with each other’s boundaries.
Awful. I lived in a house with two guys and my best friend at the time. One was a sort of a family friend of my aunt’s who I had met a couple times. We had our own “sides” of the house (guys and gals), but we shared a kitchen. Which was fine most of the time, but they never did their dishes. Then when they’d run out, they start using our dishes and hoarding them on their side. It smelled like beer and stale farts over there. They constantly had a bazillion people over to party and they’d spill over into our space (which we said was off limits). Wouldn’t turn their music down or have any sense of communal living. I moved out about 5 months into the lease.
I lived with a male coworker for two years. We were both neat freaks and liked being left alone. Although we never really connected, we always greeted each other, picked up random groceries, and share food. I personally prefer living alone and in the past girl roommates, but he was the neatest person I’ve ever lived with and no drama. He’s like a distant brother to me. Also, felt safer living with a guy.
Really good for the most part.
If they are your current friend, observe how they treat their mother. Have they been moved out for years, and still drop off their laundry at their mom’s? Do they tend to ‘not do things cause they’re not good at it? Like the dishes?
How are YOU with boundaries? With being assertive? If you make an agreement with them, something like you’ll cook if they do all of the cleaning (properly, don’t put the goddamn cast iron in the dishwasher), and they ‘want to soak it til morning’, nope. Before bed.
Be firm in your agreements.
Good luck.
I’ve had one roommate that was a platonic male friend. I loved him as a roommate because nothing he did had anything to do with me. I got to enjoy him as a companion without any pressure or expectations.
I paid him rent, he kept the common areas clean after his use (his room was a catastrophe though), we would watch movies and hang out after work and have beers.
I knew he was an infuriating friend though because his buddies would text me asking me if he was actually on his way like he said he was. And I’d say “no he just put a load in the dryer and he’s sitting on the couch”.
So the distance made everything just fine for me.
My boyfriend lived with two male roommates for a few years, and I became friends with them. When one roommate moved out, I took that spot. (Everyone was cool with this.) So I knew what I was getting into, in terms of personalities and cleanliness.
I was the only one who cleaned… but my boyfriend and our roommate were thankful that I did. (They were both really swamped with finishing their PhDs, and I was unemployed. My boyfriend was helping to financially support me. It was complicated.)
One time the roommate did something stupid and made a huge sticky mess, which he did a poor job at cleaning up. So I got out the spin mop and supervised while I taught them how to mop. They were very receptive. It seemed like they just hadn’t ever been taught how to clean anything. (In fairness, neither was I. I learned via YouTube.)
In terms of safety and feeling comfortable, that was never a problem.
I’ve had three male roommates. I’m married, gay, a woman. We had a series of roommates for a five years. Three men and a two women. It was a college town so a lot of turnover. We said up front that this is a roomie situation. Everyone does their own dishes. No petty bullshit. Pick up after yourself. I was in my 40s, they were all grad students. It worked out really well. At least for me. I hope it worked out well for them too.
Just the one, and he was excellent. Left me alone, did his fair share of housework (minimal for both of us, truthfully). Polite and brought his nice girlfriend around occasionally. Really positive experience.