I recently lost someone who meant the world to me. It’s been a few months now, and no matter how hard I try to focus on other things or distract myself, the sadness just doesn’t go away. I can’t stop thinking about all the moments we shared, and it feels like nothing will ever be as good as it was. I’m stuck in this rut where it feels like I’ll never find joy again.
How do you all cope when life feels like it’s lost its meaning? Is it possible to find happiness again after a loss like this, or do you just have to accept that things will never be the same? Would really appreciate hearing about any personal experiences.
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I’m almost 30. I’ve had these thoughts at least 3 times in my life. Let me tell you from experience, you do move on, life carries on and it gets better. Everything happens for a reason (ew cliche) and honestly let yourself be a bit messed up over it for a bit but then work on yourself. Focus on some hobbies or side projects. I turned to picking up a guitar again which helped me in my sadness, gaming and gym helped too. Getting out and about helps a load more than people give credit for. It does get easier, it does get better and you will find yourself passed these feelings in no time
Time. It’s cliche but time heals all wounds. Sometimes it is some months, sometimes it’s years. I had a loss in 2010 that was devastating. And you better believe if I ever drank too much in the ensuing years I’d break down into a sob fest.
Not to be callous, but I rarely think of that situation any longer and when I do it doesn’t cause an emotional breakdown.
Just give it time and don’t focus on “getting over it”. It will come.
It’s ok to have this feeling don’t worry and don’t think that u will not be happy again or u will be able to do so . Some things are not ment to be same forever . Just try to distract yourself try to engage yourself in new things and just spend your time with your friends and meet new people. Don’t think yourself alone people come and go I know it’s easy to say and difficult to believe but I have been in a same situation and trust me you will be fine after few weeks or months but for that the first thing is that you have to believe in yourself have to engage yourself . Try to change your environment just go for a vacation and meet new people in your life . Don’t feel like that person was your everything he was just a part of your life not a whole world if he wanted you to be her everything then would not be in this situation right now just say I deserve better and I will get better and move on enjoy your life sweetheart 💓
I lost my parent when I was 13, that was REALLY hard to cope with. And tbh it’s an ongoing thing. You never really get used to it. It’s something that permanently changed your life. There is good days where maybe you only think about them a few times and there are rough days where all you can think about is that person. I used to think it was unfortunate that I’d think about them everyday, but at the end of the day that’s just showing how much I love them. Missing someone can definitely feel painful but it shows how much you love them and nothing is wrong with that. Let yourself miss that person it’s ok. Rushing yourself to “get over it” isn’t going to help. This person mattered to you and it’s not going to be something so simple. Instead learn to adjust your life. Take breaks to think about that person if that is what you truly need. With time it really does get better. Some people can get over these types of things in a month others years. You can not compare the 2. Different people work in different ways and that’s ok. I know it’s frustrating because you wish time could pause while you process everything but unfortunately that’s not how life works. That’s why it’s important to make time to process this. What I’ve found helps for me is thinking differently about how I think about the person. Rather than “oh I’ll never get to experience this with this person” think about instead “this person would’ve loved this and wanted me to continue experiencing things that they loved”. After losing my parent I’d just sit in my dark room and cry literally all day. I know that’s not what my parent would’ve wanted tho. Whenever I miss them I like to do something they loved. Sometimes I put on their old CD and doing things like that can make you feel connected to them even if they aren’t there. I’m sure advice on this thread would will get repetitive saying “take your time” or “things will get better”. And that’s true. You never really get over it but that’s just a testament to how much love you had for them. Show that love by giving yourself the love they’d give to you.
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It’s pretty hard to cry really badddd, at a nice restaurant. Or being in your car with a friend and blasting happy music. Hell, it’s even hard to cry when you’re at the gym with motivated tunes in your headset. My point is, you are your biggest threat. Place yourself in places where sadness is difficult to be. Appreciate what you have and set short term goals. Take a moment before the start of your day and tell yourself words of affirmation.
Watch the movie “Harold and Maude”. It’s guided me for 50 years. Then go out and love some more!
Talk to a psychologist. Helps the healing 10 fold. The light is there you just may not be able to see it by yourself
I’m highly unqualified to answer this question some days will work for me it’s just getting outside some days unfortunately it’s hitting the bottle I don’t recommend that or drugs things may never be the same but you can find happiness in different ways it hurts it hurts bad sometimes I see something and I just start crying for no reason but it’s okay to cry I don’t care who you are and her some days where I just don’t get out of bed yougrieve however suits you don’t let anybody put a time limit on it for you I do recommend talking to a therapist it has helped me a great deal but sweetheart when you love somebody that much you’re always going to miss them I’m not going to lie and say it gets easier over time but remember God loves you and the sun will rise tomorrow
I’m highly unqualified to answer this question some days will work for me it’s just getting outside some days unfortunately it’s hitting the bottle I don’t recommend that or drugs things may never be the same but you can find happiness in different ways it hurts it hurts bad sometimes I see something and I just start crying for no reason but it’s okay to cry I don’t care who you are and her some days where I just don’t get out of bed yougrieve however suits you don’t let anybody put a time limit on it for you I do recommend talking to a therapist it has helped me a great deal but sweetheart when you love somebody that much you’re always going to miss them I’m not going to lie and say it gets easier over time but remember God loves you and the sun will rise tomorrow
I saw a pic of her with another man. That helped me move on 😂