I don’t have a singular question more like several. How? Why? What the fuck? I wasn’t coerced or anything like that. I listened to my primal urges instead of logic. It was a first date! We’ve only been talking for a week! And by talking I mean primarily texting because we literally don’t speak the same language. Google translate was a necessary third wheel. I don’t even know what I feel now? It’s not so much regret, but I wasn’t mentally ready for sex. He kept asking and I just gave in? Just like that? What the fuck is wrong with me? I need therapy, holy fucking shit.
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If he kept asking and you gave in, that is coercion.
Are you safe and ok?
Just sounds like a one night stand to me.
Oh girl everyone needs hookups like this. Was it good? If so, way to go! Was he hot? Schedule another date! We all need a good primal lay these days.
Don’t let the demonization of women’s sexuality make you feel like there’s something inherently wrong with having felt horny and acting on it. You are allowed to want sex, yes even on the first date. You are allowed to have one night stands or sex with anyone you want to.
If you were truly doing something you wanted to do, there’s nothing wrong with that.
I’m not saying this to say don’t try to unpack things with your therapist, but I am saying that you might want to include thinking about why you think it’s wrong to do something you wanted to do and (hopefully) enjoyed.
I had a friend who felt like this after sex with someone she barely knew, it’s completely valid to feel how you feel I would too but remember that if you felt like it was right , it was right. You don’t have to feel like trash because it’s not common for women to do these things unless she’s labeled a slut literally don’t feel bad at all please.
I guess let’s pause and talk out why do you feel something is wrong with you, that you need therapy for hooking up on a first date? From the surface, it seems like judging yourself harshly based on “slut shaming” societal expectations. If it was truly something you wanted and enjoyed, it’s okay, but I understand how the knee jerk can be to feel guilty to want that.
I literally fucked my partner first night meeting. It just was the vibe. If we ended up just as FWBs as originally planned that would’ve still made sleeping with him fine. If it was a one night stand it still wouldn’t change the answer because it was something I enjoyed and wanted at that moment.
You may need therapy for overthinking it and judge yourself that way. You did what you wanted to do. Full stop.
You can have fun, you can explore your sexuality as you please.
There is really nothing wrong in having sex in the first date. Were you safe? Were you attracted to him? Did you have fun? Was the sex good? Was he a giving, enthusiastic partner? Do you want to have more sex with him? Do you want to know him more?
It doesn’t have to be a one night stand. You guys can take a pause on the sex front and focus on knowing each other more. Or you guys can continue the sex AND the dates.