Looking to re-connect more with my brothers after some time of distance, not due to conflict or geographic separation, life just gets busy as we get older and more effort needs to be made. I’m the sister, and would like more perspective on how men view the importance of their sibling relationships in adulthood.
Adult men 30+, how do you approach, manage, and continue relationships with your adult siblings? Are these relationships beneficial in your life, and why if so (or not?)
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It’s not easy. I’ve got 3 surviving siblings and myself. One has utterly estranged himself from the rest of us over issues related to the passing of our parents and the handling of their (modest) estate. The 3 of us however are on good terms despite geographic distance and other pulls on one’s time. You’ve just got to make that phone call, send the email or text. Remember birthdays and occasions, holidays and reach out. Then when you can get together it’s less awkward. Get some lunch, just drop by and shoot the breeze, whatever. My sibs are useful to me in my life, and I am to them, which is helpful. Ironically the one who is least useful is now the odd one out lol.
One of my sisters and I have always been close and call / text each other naturally. When I visit home, we hang out like we never missed a beat
The other sister and I connect deeply in person but hardly ever talk or text. I asked her this year to set up a monthly call with me. I can tell it’s difficult for her to make time for it, but I feel like I’m doing what I can to show that I want to connect more often. I think it’s helping us grow closer.
I’m 73, male. My brother is 80. We hated each other for 50 years but 22 years ago I wrote to him to see if we could be friends for the remainder of our lives. I then told him why I hated him. He wrote back a long letter, and told me why he hated me. Ever since, we’ve been close and in each others’ lives. We both have adult kids, and we’ve gotten to know each others children. It’s been a blessing.