Wake up early and go outside for a walk with no headphones or anything just before sun is going up. I know it’s hard but doing this a couple times a week will def help getting your mind straight
You might feel isolated – but it’s not that you’re a burden to society, you are burdened with opportunity to show your worth.
It’s not 0 to 100 overnight right now. Pick 3 or 4 things over the next few days you can achieve to feel better. Clean up? Brush teeth? Go for a walk, and spend the rest of that time in things that make you feel good. Adding this slowly will help.
You’re not at big life decisions right now. We’re just doing basics. And that’s all you can ask of yourself, and that is great! Once the basics are in place, you can ask more for yourself. But as of right now, you’ll be kind to yourself and try get the basics right.
Once the basics are in place you will redeem self confidence. Truth be told, people are attracted to confident people. But that is down the line. You’ve acknowledged there is a problem so you’re not ignorant. You’re just on a journey. Baby steps and honestly it might be one day at a time.
Check your vitamin D levels. I was deficient and had the same issue. It will change your mood completely. Then get out there in the world. Take up hobbies and group activities and your life will shift.
Somebody once told me that the problem when one is stuck in a rut like this its because one is consuming much and producing little.
In other words – you’re laying around CONSUMING life and doing nothing production wise, as in DOING anything.
Get up and fucking move.
Do something.
It’s your life and do you not even care enough about it that you can’t get up and move, do something productive for yourself or has your whole life turned into being a little dopey kid sitting in bed playing video games and eating shit all day?
Hormones and mindset work! Hormones give energy – imbalance sadness and low mood/motivation (avoidance of unsafe). Strong mindset wind over all, including the situation
You need to want to actually make a change. Like deep within yourself, you know what to do, it’s just a matter of defeating your demons within and changing your thought patterns.
The difference between you and people who “live normally in society” is we just do. Like we all could decide to just sit depressed, stressed and anxious but we don’t, because we are able to push to the side our negativity, and just get into life and do it.
Start small. Join a gym, go every day, cook food, play music, try and connect with people, anyone, get on dating apps and shit, like put yourself out there in world, get a pet, change careers, give yourself a reason to do life.
Read books about depression and how to overcome it.
understand your trauma and where it comes from.
Insert gratitude into your habits, i like writing it everyday in a journal.
Journal – get your thoughts out on paper and see a pattern. Challenge your perspective on life, yourself, life itself. Get loose with it.
Start mindful practices like yoga, meditation, mindful movement or daily activities.
Re-parent yourself and become your best friend by practicing the above, together with self care activities like hobbies or gaining more knowledge.
Listen and seek out other peoples perspectives.
Make a new friend either online or irl, and be able to vent to, seek advice from and count on. Theres plenty of groups on discord or here, its pretty easy online.
Thats all that i implemented in my life to overcome my depression. Also lots of spirituality and their practices.
And most importantly be kind to yourself, never make yourself feel guilty, but push yourself enough to do at least 1 things from your to do list. Take it easy, treat yourself like you would a close friend.
I recommend a book ‘being you, changing the world’ Very inspiring when youre in a bad space mentally. Also depression isnt the end, Its your spirit trying to let you know some things arent how theyre supposed to be, you wanna do better, thats a lot.
‘’Physical reality is a reflection of whats happening in our belief system and our energy’’ — Bashar
I keep strict waking and sleeping times. I ban myself from sitting on my bed during daytime because I know if I sit there even for a minute it will suddenly be much more tempting to lay down and nap.
When I feel sleepy sitting at my desk or whatever I stand up and move (find some chore to do or doing stretches or walking on the spot). The point is moving your body gets your blood flowing quicker and makes you feel more wakeful.
I’m still depressed but these things help me feel more positive and feel like I’m fighting it instead of being stuck in a trap as you put it.
Jesus,Sunlight, diet, exercise, hobbies, call your mom lots and update her on your progress you need someone to brag to about all your new accomplishments and how good your starting to feel. litterally 3 weeks of routine like that will have you feeling way better bro good luck!!
It’s really hard and I can relate to your struggle.
Start by just doing one thing, for example have a shower, or brush your teeth, sit in the sun. Anything and it only has to be one thing however if you feel up to it do keep going but yeh don’t push yourself too much especially at first.
Also speak to your GP about how you are feeling and go from there.
Very simple … not easy… exercise… seriously, get up every day and get your heart rate up. I do a version of the 5 Tibetan Rites. You don’t have to go to a gym or have any equipment. Just find a space where you won’t get hurt and you don’t care if you look silly and do the work. If your heart and lungs are healthy everything else will follow. You got this!
Balance your sleep schedule using 3am as a tipping point: try to get more hours of sleep before 3am than after. If you need to be up by 7, make sure you’re asleep before 11.
I recommend trying “time blocking” as a goal for yourself. Paid premium tools like Motion help a lot, but they’re expensive. In the short term, just word vomit all of your tasks and their deadlines onto a word file, then feed it and your calendar into ChatGpT and ask it to help you with “time blocking” to organize your schedule in a mental-health and productivity enhancing way.
Set micro goals for yourself too. If you feel like you’re not being productive, try setting smaller goals! Make them so small it’s almost ridiculous, but STILL celebrate hitting them, even if it seems silly.
When I was depressed and writing my dissertation, it got to the point I gave my self a gold star for every paragraph I wrote, even if it was a shit paragraph that I ended up removing later. Just getting out of bed and greeting the day is worth celebrating, champ.
Oh, and balance hype music with calm music. Find a couple of songs that make you feel like attacking the day, and a couple of songs that make you feel sleepy and peaceful. Use those to help modulate your energy levels throughout the day. Rinse and repeat.
Edit:
Check out Loops too. They’re non-electronic earplugs that block 20-40% of sound from specific frequencies. Wearing them feels like you’re tuning out the “white and grey noise” in life. It’s possible you’re overstimulated more often than not and don’t realize it until you find a way to experience peacefulness for a bit.
Get your blood checked for Vitamin B, D, folate of phosphate deficiency. Get regular sun exposure or take supplements. Get sufficient sleep. Hygiene, regular showers, a bit of perfume help with self confidence and will give you more energy. Set timers on social media apps.
Easier said than done, I know. I’m in a similar situation and that’s what I’m trying to do.
Get a good primary care doctor and tell them what is going on. I downplayed my fatigue for a long time, because I was embarrassed to admit I couldn’t get out of the bed half the time. I thought the fatigue was normal and I just wasn’t able to push through it like everyone else. My PCP ran tests once I told her what all was going on and that led to me being diagnosed with an autoimmune disease.
Not having a support system is hard but it sounds like clinical depression. I was in the same state before and it still happens every now and then but having the right antidepressants saved my life. Putting my phone down, going out for walks, exercising, just doing something with the day became insanely more easier after that
You’re not lazy, you’re exhausted, depression kicks ass and it’s a chemical imbalance in your brain, and it’s not your fault it’s like that – but there are some things you can do to help it!
And it’s not normal feeling sleepy and tired all the time so maybe get some blood work to check on your iron and vitamin levels ? That might also explain why your energy levels are so low
There’s solace to be found on life, as mundane and solitary it might be, wishing you find it back soon!
Don’t go on your cellphone and avoid any “activity” that are too much “dopamine rewarding”. (Gaming, T.V, social media)
At first the boredom will be torturous for your brain. When you feel like doing something new out of boredom use that window to learn something you always wanted to do.
*Participate* twice a week in something that you genunely find fun. Silent book club over zoom, hike, board game day, pickleball, bocce, quilting circle.
Vitamin d, iron, healthy foods and movement everyday. Any active hobby will help a lot. I started taking creatine as well which helps with depression, reduces the time I need to sleep and helps me stay more focused when doing things, my mind is a lot clearer. When I’m active I can do more for longer too and less time recovering I put all that down to creatine. It really has been a game changer for me.
Making just one new habit! The minute your eyes pop open in the morning, do: ___. (Could be shower, brush teeth, walk outside for a moment.). Literally anything to break or pause the old habit. Do everyday until it’s a habit. Then add another. (Btw I am assuming you’re accessing professional help as well, which is vital. Counselor online (insurance, sliding scale, free) or in person (community centers, local Mental Health agencies). You’re depressed. This is what depression does. Find support to interrupt depressed thoughts and behaviors. It’s very doable.
Hey. First of all — I’m really sorry you’re feeling this way. That heavy, sleepy, stuck feeling can be so hard to fight, especially when you’re on your own and there’s no one around pulling you up or giving a reason to move. But the fact that you’re reaching out here shows strength — you want out of this, even if it feels impossible right now.
Here’s a starting point — think of it not as “fixing everything,” but just interrupting the cycle. A tiny crack of light into the dark room you’re in. Here’s what could help:
Start ridiculously small.
You’re not lazy — your body and brain are likely in a kind of shutdown mode. So instead of trying to “be productive,” try disrupting inertia. That might mean:
Sitting up in bed instead of lying down.
Splashing water on your face.
Drinking a glass of cold water.
Putting on a different shirt.
These are victories. Don’t underestimate them.
Get some natural light.
If you can, open a window or step outside, even for 5 minutes. Light affects your brain’s chemistry. Even cloudy daylight is better than none.
Low-effort movement.
No workouts, no expectations. Just:
Stand up and stretch your arms for 30 seconds.
Walk to the kitchen and back.
Shake your hands out.
Moving your body a little helps wake up your nervous system — and can make the sleepiness slightly better.
No shame in routine.
It might feel stupid to plan out your day when you’re not doing much — but even writing “10am: stand up” or “12pm: eat something” can anchor you.
Make one thing sacred.
Choose one thing — a ritual — that’s yours. Something small, gentle, and nice. A nightly tea. Listening to a certain song in the morning. Watching the same YouTuber before bed. A book or scent or shower.
It gives your brain a place to land when everything feels mushy.
And one more thing: you don’t need to earn rest or feel guilty for the tiredness. Depression makes rest feel like drowning instead of healing. But the very fact you want to break out of it means something deep inside you is still alive and fighting. That’s important.
If you’re open to it later, therapy (online, text-based, even peer support groups) can help a lot. You’re not broken — you’re just in a place where your mind needs real care.
Would you want me to help you come up with a 1-day mini-plan to gently disrupt the loop? Something very simple, just to start?
Look for a local club/class/group to join. Local councils often have a special website with a list and a map but you might need to call their social services branch to find it properly. I got a social worker recently and I didn’t know half of the stuff that’s actually available to me! You’ll meet people there and it’ll hopefully give you a bit of structure and something to look forward too
Hey, I won’t pretend to know your full situation, but if you’re living on your own and feeling stuck, the kindest thing you can do for yourself right now is to move your body a little every day. Start simple. Get up early, brush your teeth, and step outside. Take a few deep breaths, hold them at the top for a few seconds, exhale fully, and pause again at the bottom. Then do some light exercise. You don’t need to run or do anything intense. Just go for a brisk walk. If it feels okay, toss in a minute or two of light jogging here and there. Over time, you might find that jogging becomes more natural, and eventually you may even feel like running short bursts. It’s not about performance, it’s about showing up consistently. Aim for 30 minutes a day. It won’t fix everything, but it will get your blood moving and help you feel more awake and present.
Sleep is also a huge factor in how you feel, especially when depression is creeping in. Try to set a consistent bedtime. Even if you’re not sleepy, avoid screens for an hour before bed. Do something quiet and screen-free like reading, journaling, sketching, or knitting. Reading helps calm my mind and makes me feel sleepy. Journaling can help too, even if your day felt uneventful. Just note what you did, what crossed your mind, and what you want to do tomorrow. It clears your head and helps you feel a bit more grounded. Try to cut back on caffeine and alcohol if you can. Both mess with sleep. Once you’re exercising daily and sleeping better, you’ll probably notice you wake up feeling more refreshed.
Diet matters too. Try to cut down on processed foods and sugar. Start the day with something healthy like oatmeal with fruit or a boiled egg with rye toast. Snack on fruits and vegetables instead of chips or chocolate bars. Drink water instead of juice or soda. Eat slowly and stop before you’re full. Feeling full usually means you’ve eaten more than your body needs.
If you’re able to, check out community centers, libraries, local colleges, or rec facilities and see what classes or events are open to the public. I recently started pottery and a language class. Even if you don’t make friends right away, you’re putting yourself in social spaces, which helps chip away at the isolation. The Meetup app is another good way to find low-key group activities.
One more thing that doesn’t get talked about enough: a lot of people fall into the habit of using porn to deal with boredom or loneliness. It’s common, but it can feed depression. Try to masturbate without using porn. This may feel difficult if you’ve gotten used to it, but people managed just fine before streaming existed. Cutting it out can actually make you feel more motivated to talk to people you find attractive when you’re out in the world.
Finally, make a habit of going somewhere low-pressure like a cafe or a board game spot. Go at the same time, sit in the same seat, order the same thing. Become a regular. I used to go to the same coffee shop every day, get an Americano, and journal. After four months, I was chatting daily with the barista, doing crosswords with them, meeting their other regulars, and eventually joining a knitting circle and meeting a gym buddy. None of it happened overnight, but it started by just showing up.
Also don’t be afraid to approach a therapist to talk, or a doctor who can help you determine if a medication may help. Approach medication cautiously, and I personally would advise going into that with an attitude that its a temporary aid. Listen to your doctor though; and don’t be afraid to get a second opinion if you feel like your doctor is just lazily prescribing you drugs for any and every problem.
Just start moving. Start with a walk and maybe some stretching. Then you can start getting more into yoga, Pilates, other at-home workouts that you can find on YouTube. I promise you this will help!
Lot of great advices here but whatever you do…don’t start drinking alcohol or smoke weed (or any other drugs). This will make it worst! If you are already, stop! This will help tremendously.
Start a routine/schedule. Discipline doesn’t have to be boring, you just have to be there for yourself and be accountable to yourself. Take care of yourself because that’s what people who love themselves do. And when you are able to take care of yourself, it’ll be that much easier to care for your future friends. If you don’t believe you’ll have friends or a social circle one day, then you lack the most crucial thing that will give you that: faith. Faith is a choice and you deserve it.
Fitness start going to the gym. Get an actual workout routine purchase a program if you need to. It seems counterintuitive but being more active is what gives you energy. An object in motion stays in motion.
My biggest piece of advice; don’t keep food or drink in your room. Keep things in the fridge/ cupboards and go get things when you’re hungry/ thirsty. Then move things like entertainment outside of your bedroom. Try not to stay in PJ’s. If you can afford it, get some ‘house clothes’ like joggers and t shirts. When you leave your bedroom, put those on. Small steps but it can help you build up to being less attached to your bed
Just little baby steps. Start a new habit like doing excercises at a certain time in the day and once you’re comfortable with that, start adding in healthy eating habits. Before you know it you’re subconsciously being more healthy without really thinking too deeply into it.
Apart from all the good advice here, i would take a look at your diet too. If you’re heavy on sugars, processed foods and overall bad nutrition, that can definitely take a toll on you, not the main cause but it does matter. As always, if you’re gonna change your diet , look for a professional, never follow social media diets.
Comments
Wake up early and go outside for a walk with no headphones or anything just before sun is going up. I know it’s hard but doing this a couple times a week will def help getting your mind straight
Its a neat part, you dont
Block 👏 out 👏 the 👏 noise 👏.
You might feel isolated – but it’s not that you’re a burden to society, you are burdened with opportunity to show your worth.
It’s not 0 to 100 overnight right now. Pick 3 or 4 things over the next few days you can achieve to feel better. Clean up? Brush teeth? Go for a walk, and spend the rest of that time in things that make you feel good. Adding this slowly will help.
You’re not at big life decisions right now. We’re just doing basics. And that’s all you can ask of yourself, and that is great! Once the basics are in place, you can ask more for yourself. But as of right now, you’ll be kind to yourself and try get the basics right.
Once the basics are in place you will redeem self confidence. Truth be told, people are attracted to confident people. But that is down the line. You’ve acknowledged there is a problem so you’re not ignorant. You’re just on a journey. Baby steps and honestly it might be one day at a time.
Go lift some weights, one of the best cures for depression.
Are you in treatment?
Check your vitamin D levels. I was deficient and had the same issue. It will change your mood completely. Then get out there in the world. Take up hobbies and group activities and your life will shift.
Somebody once told me that the problem when one is stuck in a rut like this its because one is consuming much and producing little.
In other words – you’re laying around CONSUMING life and doing nothing production wise, as in DOING anything.
Get up and fucking move.
Do something.
It’s your life and do you not even care enough about it that you can’t get up and move, do something productive for yourself or has your whole life turned into being a little dopey kid sitting in bed playing video games and eating shit all day?
Ya gotta get moving.
Hormones and mindset work! Hormones give energy – imbalance sadness and low mood/motivation (avoidance of unsafe). Strong mindset wind over all, including the situation
You need to want to actually make a change. Like deep within yourself, you know what to do, it’s just a matter of defeating your demons within and changing your thought patterns.
The difference between you and people who “live normally in society” is we just do. Like we all could decide to just sit depressed, stressed and anxious but we don’t, because we are able to push to the side our negativity, and just get into life and do it.
Start small. Join a gym, go every day, cook food, play music, try and connect with people, anyone, get on dating apps and shit, like put yourself out there in world, get a pet, change careers, give yourself a reason to do life.
Read books about depression and how to overcome it.
understand your trauma and where it comes from.
Insert gratitude into your habits, i like writing it everyday in a journal.
Journal – get your thoughts out on paper and see a pattern. Challenge your perspective on life, yourself, life itself. Get loose with it.
Start mindful practices like yoga, meditation, mindful movement or daily activities.
Re-parent yourself and become your best friend by practicing the above, together with self care activities like hobbies or gaining more knowledge.
Listen and seek out other peoples perspectives.
Make a new friend either online or irl, and be able to vent to, seek advice from and count on. Theres plenty of groups on discord or here, its pretty easy online.
Thats all that i implemented in my life to overcome my depression. Also lots of spirituality and their practices.
And most importantly be kind to yourself, never make yourself feel guilty, but push yourself enough to do at least 1 things from your to do list. Take it easy, treat yourself like you would a close friend.
I recommend a book ‘being you, changing the world’ Very inspiring when youre in a bad space mentally. Also depression isnt the end, Its your spirit trying to let you know some things arent how theyre supposed to be, you wanna do better, thats a lot.
‘’Physical reality is a reflection of whats happening in our belief system and our energy’’ — Bashar
“Eat a banana and get sunlight.” -some persons mom
Limit phone usage
Go out every day even if its just a short walk
Find / engage in a hobby
Meditation morning and night
I know these things are hard to do when depression is involved but I promise it will make a difference and will get easier as the days go on .
Take a day at a time.
Consider seeing a doctor to discuss therapy and possible medication
Remember: some of your best days haven’t happened yet . Keep holding on
Good luck x
I keep strict waking and sleeping times. I ban myself from sitting on my bed during daytime because I know if I sit there even for a minute it will suddenly be much more tempting to lay down and nap.
When I feel sleepy sitting at my desk or whatever I stand up and move (find some chore to do or doing stretches or walking on the spot). The point is moving your body gets your blood flowing quicker and makes you feel more wakeful.
I’m still depressed but these things help me feel more positive and feel like I’m fighting it instead of being stuck in a trap as you put it.
Jesus,Sunlight, diet, exercise, hobbies, call your mom lots and update her on your progress you need someone to brag to about all your new accomplishments and how good your starting to feel. litterally 3 weeks of routine like that will have you feeling way better bro good luck!!
It’s really hard and I can relate to your struggle.
Start by just doing one thing, for example have a shower, or brush your teeth, sit in the sun. Anything and it only has to be one thing however if you feel up to it do keep going but yeh don’t push yourself too much especially at first.
Also speak to your GP about how you are feeling and go from there.
eat less sugar
Take some kratom or get on adhd meds!! Worked wonders for me!!
Very simple … not easy… exercise… seriously, get up every day and get your heart rate up. I do a version of the 5 Tibetan Rites. You don’t have to go to a gym or have any equipment. Just find a space where you won’t get hurt and you don’t care if you look silly and do the work. If your heart and lungs are healthy everything else will follow. You got this!
Get some air.
Balance your sleep schedule using 3am as a tipping point: try to get more hours of sleep before 3am than after. If you need to be up by 7, make sure you’re asleep before 11.
I recommend trying “time blocking” as a goal for yourself. Paid premium tools like Motion help a lot, but they’re expensive. In the short term, just word vomit all of your tasks and their deadlines onto a word file, then feed it and your calendar into ChatGpT and ask it to help you with “time blocking” to organize your schedule in a mental-health and productivity enhancing way.
Set micro goals for yourself too. If you feel like you’re not being productive, try setting smaller goals! Make them so small it’s almost ridiculous, but STILL celebrate hitting them, even if it seems silly.
When I was depressed and writing my dissertation, it got to the point I gave my self a gold star for every paragraph I wrote, even if it was a shit paragraph that I ended up removing later. Just getting out of bed and greeting the day is worth celebrating, champ.
Oh, and balance hype music with calm music. Find a couple of songs that make you feel like attacking the day, and a couple of songs that make you feel sleepy and peaceful. Use those to help modulate your energy levels throughout the day. Rinse and repeat.
Edit:
Check out Loops too. They’re non-electronic earplugs that block 20-40% of sound from specific frequencies. Wearing them feels like you’re tuning out the “white and grey noise” in life. It’s possible you’re overstimulated more often than not and don’t realize it until you find a way to experience peacefulness for a bit.
Get your blood checked for Vitamin B, D, folate of phosphate deficiency. Get regular sun exposure or take supplements. Get sufficient sleep. Hygiene, regular showers, a bit of perfume help with self confidence and will give you more energy. Set timers on social media apps.
Easier said than done, I know. I’m in a similar situation and that’s what I’m trying to do.
Try a therapeutic diet such as keto for 2-3 months. There is growing evidence that it can help cure things like depression.
Get a good primary care doctor and tell them what is going on. I downplayed my fatigue for a long time, because I was embarrassed to admit I couldn’t get out of the bed half the time. I thought the fatigue was normal and I just wasn’t able to push through it like everyone else. My PCP ran tests once I told her what all was going on and that led to me being diagnosed with an autoimmune disease.
Not having a support system is hard but it sounds like clinical depression. I was in the same state before and it still happens every now and then but having the right antidepressants saved my life. Putting my phone down, going out for walks, exercising, just doing something with the day became insanely more easier after that
You’re not lazy, you’re exhausted, depression kicks ass and it’s a chemical imbalance in your brain, and it’s not your fault it’s like that – but there are some things you can do to help it!
And it’s not normal feeling sleepy and tired all the time so maybe get some blood work to check on your iron and vitamin levels ? That might also explain why your energy levels are so low
There’s solace to be found on life, as mundane and solitary it might be, wishing you find it back soon!
Do healthy routines, wake up in the morning early to go for walk then eat healthy foods.
Don’t go on your cellphone and avoid any “activity” that are too much “dopamine rewarding”. (Gaming, T.V, social media)
At first the boredom will be torturous for your brain. When you feel like doing something new out of boredom use that window to learn something you always wanted to do.
*Participate* twice a week in something that you genunely find fun. Silent book club over zoom, hike, board game day, pickleball, bocce, quilting circle.
Join a gym that’s the best way to find friends
Depression but can be caused by many different things. Get tested for adult ADHD
Is your house moldy? Mold can cause all this and more for about 20% of the population.
Vitamin d, iron, healthy foods and movement everyday. Any active hobby will help a lot. I started taking creatine as well which helps with depression, reduces the time I need to sleep and helps me stay more focused when doing things, my mind is a lot clearer. When I’m active I can do more for longer too and less time recovering I put all that down to creatine. It really has been a game changer for me.
I make my bed first thing and stay out until bed time. Set small achievable goals and celebrate completion.
Making just one new habit! The minute your eyes pop open in the morning, do: ___. (Could be shower, brush teeth, walk outside for a moment.). Literally anything to break or pause the old habit. Do everyday until it’s a habit. Then add another. (Btw I am assuming you’re accessing professional help as well, which is vital. Counselor online (insurance, sliding scale, free) or in person (community centers, local Mental Health agencies). You’re depressed. This is what depression does. Find support to interrupt depressed thoughts and behaviors. It’s very doable.
Go do pushups. And stop eating anything with sugars , sweat … and all carbs –
No no …
Start eat stakes and you will
Be a different men !
Read about success stories to motivate you. See the life success can make. Believe in your capabilities that you can achieve.
Pick a friend to go to do some sport or activities with.
That did it for me 🙂
I wish you all the best <3
As a father, that doesn’t sound like depression. That sounds like relaxation and I only get that when I get sick.
Hey. First of all — I’m really sorry you’re feeling this way. That heavy, sleepy, stuck feeling can be so hard to fight, especially when you’re on your own and there’s no one around pulling you up or giving a reason to move. But the fact that you’re reaching out here shows strength — you want out of this, even if it feels impossible right now.
Here’s a starting point — think of it not as “fixing everything,” but just interrupting the cycle. A tiny crack of light into the dark room you’re in. Here’s what could help:
You’re not lazy — your body and brain are likely in a kind of shutdown mode. So instead of trying to “be productive,” try disrupting inertia. That might mean:
Sitting up in bed instead of lying down.
Splashing water on your face.
Drinking a glass of cold water.
Putting on a different shirt.
These are victories. Don’t underestimate them.
If you can, open a window or step outside, even for 5 minutes. Light affects your brain’s chemistry. Even cloudy daylight is better than none.
No workouts, no expectations. Just:
Stand up and stretch your arms for 30 seconds.
Walk to the kitchen and back.
Shake your hands out.
Moving your body a little helps wake up your nervous system — and can make the sleepiness slightly better.
It might feel stupid to plan out your day when you’re not doing much — but even writing “10am: stand up” or “12pm: eat something” can anchor you.
Choose one thing — a ritual — that’s yours. Something small, gentle, and nice. A nightly tea. Listening to a certain song in the morning. Watching the same YouTuber before bed. A book or scent or shower.
It gives your brain a place to land when everything feels mushy.
And one more thing: you don’t need to earn rest or feel guilty for the tiredness. Depression makes rest feel like drowning instead of healing. But the very fact you want to break out of it means something deep inside you is still alive and fighting. That’s important.
If you’re open to it later, therapy (online, text-based, even peer support groups) can help a lot. You’re not broken — you’re just in a place where your mind needs real care.
Would you want me to help you come up with a 1-day mini-plan to gently disrupt the loop? Something very simple, just to start?
Look for a local club/class/group to join. Local councils often have a special website with a list and a map but you might need to call their social services branch to find it properly. I got a social worker recently and I didn’t know half of the stuff that’s actually available to me! You’ll meet people there and it’ll hopefully give you a bit of structure and something to look forward too
Clean your diet up. Eat like a healthy adult and you’ll have energy out of your ass.
It sounds basic, but you get fucking tiger blood after 30/45 days of a good nutrition program.
Hey, I won’t pretend to know your full situation, but if you’re living on your own and feeling stuck, the kindest thing you can do for yourself right now is to move your body a little every day. Start simple. Get up early, brush your teeth, and step outside. Take a few deep breaths, hold them at the top for a few seconds, exhale fully, and pause again at the bottom. Then do some light exercise. You don’t need to run or do anything intense. Just go for a brisk walk. If it feels okay, toss in a minute or two of light jogging here and there. Over time, you might find that jogging becomes more natural, and eventually you may even feel like running short bursts. It’s not about performance, it’s about showing up consistently. Aim for 30 minutes a day. It won’t fix everything, but it will get your blood moving and help you feel more awake and present.
Sleep is also a huge factor in how you feel, especially when depression is creeping in. Try to set a consistent bedtime. Even if you’re not sleepy, avoid screens for an hour before bed. Do something quiet and screen-free like reading, journaling, sketching, or knitting. Reading helps calm my mind and makes me feel sleepy. Journaling can help too, even if your day felt uneventful. Just note what you did, what crossed your mind, and what you want to do tomorrow. It clears your head and helps you feel a bit more grounded. Try to cut back on caffeine and alcohol if you can. Both mess with sleep. Once you’re exercising daily and sleeping better, you’ll probably notice you wake up feeling more refreshed.
Diet matters too. Try to cut down on processed foods and sugar. Start the day with something healthy like oatmeal with fruit or a boiled egg with rye toast. Snack on fruits and vegetables instead of chips or chocolate bars. Drink water instead of juice or soda. Eat slowly and stop before you’re full. Feeling full usually means you’ve eaten more than your body needs.
If you’re able to, check out community centers, libraries, local colleges, or rec facilities and see what classes or events are open to the public. I recently started pottery and a language class. Even if you don’t make friends right away, you’re putting yourself in social spaces, which helps chip away at the isolation. The Meetup app is another good way to find low-key group activities.
One more thing that doesn’t get talked about enough: a lot of people fall into the habit of using porn to deal with boredom or loneliness. It’s common, but it can feed depression. Try to masturbate without using porn. This may feel difficult if you’ve gotten used to it, but people managed just fine before streaming existed. Cutting it out can actually make you feel more motivated to talk to people you find attractive when you’re out in the world.
Finally, make a habit of going somewhere low-pressure like a cafe or a board game spot. Go at the same time, sit in the same seat, order the same thing. Become a regular. I used to go to the same coffee shop every day, get an Americano, and journal. After four months, I was chatting daily with the barista, doing crosswords with them, meeting their other regulars, and eventually joining a knitting circle and meeting a gym buddy. None of it happened overnight, but it started by just showing up.
Also don’t be afraid to approach a therapist to talk, or a doctor who can help you determine if a medication may help. Approach medication cautiously, and I personally would advise going into that with an attitude that its a temporary aid. Listen to your doctor though; and don’t be afraid to get a second opinion if you feel like your doctor is just lazily prescribing you drugs for any and every problem.
Just start moving. Start with a walk and maybe some stretching. Then you can start getting more into yoga, Pilates, other at-home workouts that you can find on YouTube. I promise you this will help!
Lot of great advices here but whatever you do…don’t start drinking alcohol or smoke weed (or any other drugs). This will make it worst! If you are already, stop! This will help tremendously.
Start a routine/schedule. Discipline doesn’t have to be boring, you just have to be there for yourself and be accountable to yourself. Take care of yourself because that’s what people who love themselves do. And when you are able to take care of yourself, it’ll be that much easier to care for your future friends. If you don’t believe you’ll have friends or a social circle one day, then you lack the most crucial thing that will give you that: faith. Faith is a choice and you deserve it.
Fitness start going to the gym. Get an actual workout routine purchase a program if you need to. It seems counterintuitive but being more active is what gives you energy. An object in motion stays in motion.
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My biggest piece of advice; don’t keep food or drink in your room. Keep things in the fridge/ cupboards and go get things when you’re hungry/ thirsty. Then move things like entertainment outside of your bedroom. Try not to stay in PJ’s. If you can afford it, get some ‘house clothes’ like joggers and t shirts. When you leave your bedroom, put those on. Small steps but it can help you build up to being less attached to your bed
Check your thyroid
I like to rid my mtb in the Forrest and halfway in just stop at a beautiful scenery and watch, listen and breath. I love it
Just little baby steps. Start a new habit like doing excercises at a certain time in the day and once you’re comfortable with that, start adding in healthy eating habits. Before you know it you’re subconsciously being more healthy without really thinking too deeply into it.
Apart from all the good advice here, i would take a look at your diet too. If you’re heavy on sugars, processed foods and overall bad nutrition, that can definitely take a toll on you, not the main cause but it does matter. As always, if you’re gonna change your diet , look for a professional, never follow social media diets.