I won’t forgive my mom for leaving me in a hot car as a kid

r/

It was always across from a liquor store and some stupid bar they went to. My mom and her bf would go in there and leave me in the car with no a/c on. I remember was really young still in some sort of car seat. I wasn’t old enough to really understand why they left but old enough to be scared and feel abandoned. It was so damn hot in that car and there was no relief. I remember getting so tired sometimes but wanting to stay awake so I could see them come back. I don’t know how long it was, but it felt like forever and it happened multiple times throughout my childhood and always on a warm sunny day. One time this person came up to the window, and I got really scared cause I thought they were trying to kidnap me. As an adult, I realize maybe they were trying to make sure that I was ok because I was a young child in a car that wasn’t on and windows weren’t cracked either. Once i grew up more and learned how dangerous that is and how deadly it can be I felt shock, horror, anger, confusion on why the hell they would do that?? I still feel horrified thinking how I could have died. What if I had fallen asleep and couldn’t wake up. It’s so irresponsible it’s enraging. I’ve never confronted her about this, I’m still trying to process everything.

Comments

  1. 619OG Avatar

    Wtf?
    Why is this an issue today? How old are you now?

  2. Silly_Recording2806 Avatar

    Therapy for abandonment issues.

  3. Godsin1969 Avatar

    Before I was born i remember going to party with my dad and leaving with my mom…

  4. spatulacitymanager Avatar

    [ Removed by Reddit ]

  5. Profession_Mobile Avatar

    That’s awful. We never hear from the people who lived through that scary experience.

  6. ricoxoxo Avatar

    You don’t ever get over it, but you remember and move forward.

  7. DeadrthanDead Avatar

    When I was baby my dad came home from shopping and left me in the car forgetting that I was in there, and just went inside until my mom came home and found me in there and started yelling. Parents are not perfect.

  8. ignorance-on-fire Avatar

    Real or not IDC, it happens and in a case like this yeah, unforgivable.

  9. --Saavy-- Avatar

    When I was elementary school age I remember going to my aunts house and being told to stay in one room and her and my dad go to another together and then being aggressively questioned about it when I got home by my mom

  10. raelik777 Avatar

    You are literally lucky to be alive.

  11. EdenCapwell Avatar

    You don’t need to get over it or forgive them. But I think it would not only be healthy, but HEALING to speak openly about it to your mother (and the BF if he’s still in the picture.) They deserve to be called out for their poor decision-making that could have KILLED YOU TO DEATH, and you deserve the healing that comes from ripping a bandaid off and letting the wound breathe clean air. I’m so sorry that happened to you.

  12. Practical-Spell-3808 Avatar

    My first memory was waking up strapped in a car seat while my mom ran into the post office. I was screaming and trying to claw my way out. Guess who has BPD with major abandonment issues! Woohoo thanks mom.

  13. buffalo_Fart Avatar

    You got to confront her. It doesn’t matter when, you just have to say it at some point. I went after my mother a lot when she was older. Because she finally accepted responsibility after she got past a certain age. Before that she would just feel sorry for herself and start crying so there could never be any healing for either one of us.

    I used to get left in the car all the time when I was a boy while my mom would go shopping in the grocery store or department store for an hour. So I feel your pain but I wasn’t in a car seat I was just left in the car. So it’s a little different.

  14. stillbornangel Avatar

    im so sorry this happened to u 💔 leaving u in that dangerous situation so many times is awful

  15. melraelee Avatar

    Reading this made me so sad, for you and for myself. My mom was neglectful too, and as an adult with children I have remembered a handful of things she did when I was a child that are shocking and hurtful

    You’re not alone, and I’m sorry you have to sort this stuff out.

  16. UnfilteredSan Avatar

    Have you distanced yourself from your mom due to this?

    She needs to know what she did was horrible. Evil honestly.

  17. Delophosaur Avatar

    My mother is decent but I vividly remember her leaving me and the family dog in her hot car long enough for my vision to go blurry. I don’t know how your mother is but I know of if I tried to confront mine about this, she’d have no recollection of it and she’d get defensive, so just use your best judgement on if it’s worth it to talk to her.

  18. Visual-Sector6642 Avatar

    Had to ride on long trips in the back of an open bed truck inside a cardboard box during winter. The gas fumes were very bad. We thought it was fun but looking back I’m not sure it was appropriate.

  19. BlumpkinLord Avatar

    As hard as it may be, forgive and move on, but never trust the same or hold the same respect for said person. They don’t deserve that. It was straight up neglectful and irresponsible. But not moving on may hold you back on the future, and they don’t deserve to hold that power over you.

  20. mjornir Avatar

    Your mom fucking sucks.