When I was a teenager I was a unknowing cuckold to my crush

I grew up and used to know a girl I’ll call “Amayrani.” From a young age we were best friends even though I was a boy. We both were raised by single moms who were best friends. She was also friends with my sisters. Amayrani was an only child, we were same age, went to same classes. Rode bus together. We’d spend so much time together.

When we were younger it was a lot of bike riding, soccer, video games. But when we started to get up to junior high I started noticing girls and noticed she started noticing boys.

She started dating this kid named “Jose.” When I first found out they slept together I was jealous but didn’t know why. I did know Jose had a bunch of friends, all guys, and Amayrani started hanging around them and we saw each other less.

Sometime later I found out they were all having sex with her. They made videos and uploaded pics of it to MySpace. It went all over our school. I found out Amayrani had an abortion.

At this time her mom pulled her out of our school and had her move in with her family in Texas.

Knowing she was having sex with them but I never got to have sex with her made me jealous. I didn’t understand how I felt.

But it wasn’t until years later I realized that I always loved her and she was my first true love. And I’ve always mourned the loss of never getting to be with her.

Now we are late 30’s and I haven’t spoke to her since 2007. I want to call her but heard she has become married with kids. I’m single now. I wish it could have worked out.gy